Phrases

Occasionally I listen.  On these occasions I hear phrases. When these phrases are particularly weird, I write them down to share here. Without further ado:

• There's a lot of weather out there
• My mother taught me how to play Dungeons and Dragons
• They found their houses were not where they left them
• His unforgettable personality will never be forgotten
• I love Algebra. I have used Algebra in real life!
• You steal one car and all of the sudden, you're a car thief.
• You've got to slide up and down on the hard thing,
• Let me show you my jetpack.
• Uh oh, the electric company is here - the power is going to go out.
• Please bring ant spray.
• The backdoor front will lead south
• Let me ring up that Eeyore
• Life is a senseless moment
• When I speak about an insider, this guy was inside
• He's also a hermaphrodite
• a rousing, barbershop rendition of Rihanna’s “Bitch Better Have My Money.”
• Why don't the aliens abduct Kim Kardashian and shrink her ass?
• ..the only arm wrestling movie.
• I tried to touch you and my skin didn't crawl too badly.
• The steakhouse was caught serving up horse meat instead of zebra.
• It's a good thing the dog can smell in the dark.
• We were craving falafel.
• ..having backgammon parties
• I was listening to Luciano Pavoratti today...
• Bear Chili
• I like doing laundry
• When I lived in Arkansas
• Crispy fried tofu is delicious
• I'm so thankful I found a slumlord




more on the way....