Captivity - Day 88 You Can't Hang Yourself with the Curtains

Mrs lefty took advantage of the sun and good temperature and went shopping.
Fortunately the shoe stores aren't open yet.
Lowes looks like the aftermath of forecast snow. Shelves were almost picked clean of garden tools and the only bird feed they had was in 40lb bags, all of which were ripped open. You can't buy a shovel.

Speaking of helium, you can't find it. You can find balloons. The one place that had helium, had no balloons. And now the place with the balloons doesn't have balloons. It's the Helium Conspiracy, you know.  A theory hasn't been formed yet. Maybe the Illuminati are hoarding helium. They want to build an H bomb.

On the way out of Lowes, she saw a BMW with an elderly gentleman in the passenger seat. The car wasn't running, the windows weren't rolled down, and the temp had risen significantly. She went over and gestured 'can I open the door?' The poor old guy was uncomfortably hot. She asked if he'd like the windows down or the air conditioning on. The guy said he leaves it alone because his son's car is new and he doesn't know how to operate it. Mrs lefty would have none of this, especially as the ding dong who owns it left the keys in the ignition. She turned on the a/c, the gent was happy, and now he has a story he can tell.

We are told not to leave pets in the car with the windows up. Do we really have to warn people not to leave old persons in the car with the windows up? Wife's brother got a BMW. She asked him how long it will take til he drives like an asshole.


In other news, the Boeing 737 MAX continues to not be fixed.
Flying is aiming yourself at the ground and missing. The 737 fails to miss.
I think we've begun the age of the machines. AI is slowly getting rid of us. The 737 plummets, Teslas crash into things, and the Internet of insecure stuff is wide open for the hacking. Skynet has gone online.


BEST headline:  Man who shot himself in penis gets hard sentence


If you go to a protest or mass gathering, turn location OFF on your phone.  The BLM protests are being monitored, collecting your info for political parties or Flying AIDS monitoring. Or turn off your phone. There are no laws around this.


The FDA has canceled emergency use of Hydroxychloroquine, as unlikely to produce an antiviral effect. Again - they have NO. IDEA. What they're talking about.


Are we aghast about Seattle, where BLM/Antifa took over a few blocks and issued DEMANDS before they would leave? If their parents were there, they'd say, "If you're going to behave like an animal, you belong in a zoo."

We have a funny way of dealing with illegal activity.

We can all agree that the Floyd killing was completely unjustified and morally wrong. It appears the response to the rioting wasn't all that great. So far, nobody has said what IS a good response. Letting people illegally occupy multi-block neighborhoods seems less than optimal. I suspect this won't end well. At this point, the police are handicapped from above, and the illegal occupants are quite nasty and prepared for a skirmish.

In Philly, we deal with things differently: we bomb the house (and most of the block)


Walmart wants to get rid of all cashiers, instead using self-service lanes. Good old Walton family... squeezing every penny out of their employees and customers. Of course it's their right, as a business, but it's ugly. They can put the savings into more surveillance. You're already on tape at the checkout... maybe some drones to follow you around.  Time to not show up at Walmart. This disease is starting to affect other stores too.


SHOCKING:  More than 7 in 10 people won't use contact-tracing apps. We're starting to slowly understand privacy!

Elephants in Self-Driving Cars

iPeople: free email is being spied on. Regardless of platform, if it's free, your privacy is the cost.



Uber self-driving cars are allowed back on California roads, nearly 2 years after a fatal crash in Arizona.  Because gravity is different in California.

This, too, will fail, when Uber realizes you can't be robbed or raped without a driver.

• Tesla remotely disabled Autopilot on a used Model S after it was sold. Because buyer didn't pay for it.
• Because Tesla had access to it.  Yank the modems in your car. Your phones and e-book readers, along with iMusic devices, run like this too.

Third person in UK confirmed with coronavirus will be taken to a specialist NHS centre - in 3 weeks.

Speaking of which, China has a big problem. No, not that one.
Its people are wearing masks for coronavirus. But masks don't play well with facial recognition. What to do?    I don't know, but let's pretend we have coronavirus in the US.

• The latest Win 10 update problems and how to fix them

I need to get my eyes checked.
I can't see anything closer than 18" from my eyes.
This is a problem for many reasons, one of them being my great love for going to doctors (or much of anywhere else, but doctors are the worst). Mentally girding myself for the ride, I looked up optometrists in the area. Since I drive by them every day, I can't name one place in the vicinity. Among my search results were Sears Auto and a shoe store. I felt reasonable certain that Sears Auto had absolutely no glasses, because the chain closed, AND they only had auto glass (my head ain't that big).

Since we live in the 2000s, I could go to their websites and actually peruse frames. This is tremendous for me, as I can scratch off most, if not all, of the places because their frames are hideous, ugly, expensive, have designer names, and simply aren't what I want.

The last time I got the urge, I went online and found 34,473 frame 'stores'. And POOF - there were the frames I wanted. Glory be, you coulda knocked me over with an Abrams tank.  The really frightening part is that there were more than one pair!  The only problem is that I couldn't see the size, which was somewhat of a problem. Oh yeah, they were more than reasonably priced. I ran around the house, doing my impression of the Glasses Dance *(no I didn't) and showed it to the wife. Wife, Bringer of All Good News (and death), said they were very nice but it was stupid to buy them online because the stores would kill me with charges to make the lenses. Ah, what about if I send the rx to the online store? Nah, you don't know what you're getting and can't get them adjusted.

Wife could sink a very large cruise ship, with thousands aboard, that hadn't even gotten any coronavirus yet.  I was mad because that's my gig, and she bested me without so much as a pbthlllllllt.

I continued online, finding local places that weren't shoe stores or famous chain shutdowns. Someone needs to update their algorithms. The reason the shoe store appeared is that they have glasses in their ad. It turns out every department store has opticians, as well as their own personal selection of the most expensive and hideous frames possible. Macy's, that bastion of Cheap Stuff, advertised designer names before any pictures of frames. I looked and asked the non-obvious question: why are Sears Auto frames $79 and the exact pair, with a designer name printed on them, $399? Obviously, Very Snotty People (VSP) need to pay hundreds extra, literally for someone's name, scrawled upon their frame. It's the Frame Game!  I can afford to look down my nose at frames with some designer's name emblazoned where everybody can see (and think "Wow, that idiot has way too much money"). After all, I have a lot of guitars with the manufacturers' names on them, as well as a tall, black amplifier, named after my most loved dog. And shirts, hats, and a keychain I gave the wife. The difference here is that the name actually means something - better quality. Stamping Roy Smegma on frames doesn't take the quality up a notch or three.

Other 'recommended search results' were for carpet, women's buzzing relief aids, and tree surgeons (not covered by insurance).

To make a long story longer, I managed to rule out about 80% of what I saw. I'd have ruled out the other 20%, but the sites were cleverly designed so you couldn't actually see the frames (get it - see!). Something they teach you in Web Designer School is how to make the product visible on the front page, link it to a choice of product, and put in absolutely nothing whatsoever that will allow the viewer to actually see the products. Yes, I clicked Mens Frames, but it took me to Auto Glass. I clicked Womens Frames (no, I don't crossdress, most of the time), at which point it just sat there, mocking me. To make things more frustrating, student designers are taught how to make a spinning hourglass or circle, to make viewers think the page is going to actually do something. The students are peeing their pants by the end of this lesson.

Hang on - I just figured it out.... the pages that display the products are broken on purpose! You start to browse, can't find a single thing, then have to go to the store to look. Sheer genius. Nobody believes me when I tell them there's a conspiracy behind everything. Not even the doctors in the white uniforms.

So I have no idea whether I'm getting frames online or offline, and I'll have to leave the house, breaking my solemn vow as an amateur agoraphobe.

I haven't been on Twitter a lot, after that 58 year old woman sent me nudes.




Brain cells called microglia eat away mice's memories.
How do they get the mice to take those ridiculous memory tests?

• Boeing has identified yet another software problem on the 737 MAX.
• At this point, the fact that it has software seems to be the problem.
• In other news, Boeing has many new job openings for test pilots

Is it safe to for your ISP to use your router as a hotspot?
If you have Comcast, it likely uses your router as a wifi access point for people outside your house. While it's not immediately dangerous, hacks will emerge, plus you can't trust Comcast. The only immediate negative is congestion.

• Apple fined 25 million euro for deliberately slowing down old iPhones.
• Every day there's another reason to be sad I didn't buy an iDevice

The federal car safety agency approved a self-driving vehicle, waiving requirements for a windshield and mirrors. It's a tiny thing, intended for deliveries. Children's wagons will run it over. It will also be used at carnivals as the Ride of Death, because it's about that size.

• I have one gray eyebrow hair. If I had OCD, I'd be insane.

Since it was Sunday night, I went to bed early (2am) because I had work the next morning. I use my phone as a flashlight, so as not to wake anyone. And... there is no dog. This is a little weird, as she sleeps with her mommy always. I keep looking around. There was no dog downstairs and there would be no dog on the floor (she only sleeps on the couch or the bed - it's tough being a dog). The riddle was solved when the covers started to move, and little head popped out from under them. Well, you have to make yourself comfortable.....

The challenge is to link Sunday to something else.
Last Sunday we went out for dinner. We try to do this every month or so.
If you think I'm a little odd here, you should see me in retail establishments. Better yet, you shouldn't see me.
This one place requires you to order first, then go to your seat. Noticing they had blueberry cobbler for dessert, I ordered the heaviest, richest chocolate dessert. The cashier looked at me for a second, confused, and told me they only had the Blueberry Thing. I didn't do it to give the young lady a hard time - I did it as a request. They rotate desserts and they have chocolate about 2 days a year, first making sure I'm not in the restaurant before they put it out. This is why I don't go out a lot.


Today's best book titles:

• Pencils You Should Know
• How to Eat
• My Feet Are Killing Me

Best help solution: How to politely get a toddler to leave you alone



You don't have to believe anything typed here.

I listened to a radio show and heard this one...
A woman is beside herself with grief over her dog, who pretty much has to take the last trip to the vet. She and the dog are in the basement, she's crying and praying to heal the dog. The husband comes halfway down the steps, sees something wispy and gray, and loses time. When he 'returns,' the wife and dog are running around the room, with nothing wrong.

Hell of a story.
I wish whatever that thing was could have visited Marshall....

• Why are trucks getting bigger and cars getting smaller? I want my damn land yachts back!

Comcast is stroking itself publicly by stating a goal of 31k veterans hired.
You just know some wag will be running around yelling "INCOMING!"



Today I identify as   maple syrup

• Headline: Use Alexa to figure out what beer and wine to pair with your dinner
• We know Alexa is a bad word here, but if you want beer or wine with your dinner and have to ask Alexa, perhaps you shouldn't be drinking beer or wine with your dinner.
• Maybe you could call good old Uncle Bobby Jim and he could give you a beer suggestion. He's somewhat of an expert, having been drunk since 1955. 

Faceyspaces News

• As Sacha Baron Cohen criticizes Lord Zuck, Elon Musk tweets #DeleteFacespaces   -  some people are getting wise
• Faceyspaces loses control of its own Twitter account
• Faceyspaces encrypted messaging will 'create hiding places for child abuse'
• This is not helpful, even from child protection organizations. First of all, the criminals can simply go to a different encrypted messaging program. Second, privacy is going to hide Bad Stuff, but that's the price. Third, this could have come from a govt - the same bloody tired excuse: It's for the children. Fourth, cut the crap.

Storm Caira: since the storm started, my wife keeps looking through the windows.  If it gets worse, I'll have to let her in.      - @bf3ftw1888

• Scientists have discovered evidence of dream telepathy between humans
• This is interesting news. Many believed this to be true, long before Science.
• Science, having evidence, will convince some professionals to pursue it.
• I suspect we're getting closer and closer to understanding the nature of things, down at the quantum level.
• I predict that religion is going to have a Big Problem with this.

Starting in WWII, the top spying company, trusted by leaders the world over to spy on allies and enemies, was Crypto AG. We are all deeply shocked to learn that Crypto AG was owned by the CIA.




Heroes of the Stupid
Teen growing his hair for his sister (undergoing chemotherapy), withdraws from Texas high school after he was told to get a haircut.   There is a hair policy at this school!




SJW Support

Famous Faceyspaces Falsely Flags "hate speech" for reporting on Saira Rao's $2500 to have a dinner while getting scolded for being white fiasco.

We're all sick of Award Ceremony Whining (ACW), but this fellow is a rare gem: Taika Waititi slams Apple's MacBook keyboards after winning first Oscar




The Draconian Files

China takes wartime measures to stop coronavirus.
door-to-door home searches

US Government buys location data for millions of cellphones
It's for the children. No, wait, it's for illegal aliens.

Netflix gets takedown demands from govts
damn.. the Brazilian one looks pretty funny





SJW Slithering

She makes a hell of an argument..

The Elephants are Running the Car Washes!

In an event that no one saw coming, Elizabeth Hurley, model and part-time goddess, posed semi-topless in a British rag. Jee-bus, this woman is 54...

• Police surprise 4 yr old boy for xmas after mother's murder.
• Trying not to post stuff like this, but someone needed a Christmas miracle.

All of the space missions featured a small army of guys behind consoles. I thought they were all faking usefulness or watching adult entertainment. The Apollo control room has been resurrected, with each console explained. This cements a conspiracy theory: the Moon missions were faked because the controllers were watching pr0n.

• If you bought a live xmas tree, you paid a state-mandated $0.15 to the Christmas Tree Promotion Board. This is what we elect.

Be careful of Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwaanza and New Years themed malware. The initial version comes via snail mail, with a phrase like Merry Christmas on it. DO NOT OPEN IT. Later versions come in the form of email, with similar phrases on the subject line. Don't open these either. The most virulent, nasty malware is marked by subject lines with emojis on them. Never open these. Jonathan McAfree, from McAfree Antivirus Division (MAD) explains that if you delete them immediately, the authors will get frustrated and not send any more of them. 

• Speaking of dead musicians, I'm tuning around the bands and come across a guitar solo that jumps out and grabs my ear in the first half second. Sure enough it's UK, with then-guitarist Allan Holdsworth. RIP.

I don't know how many of you spent any time in mental hospitals, nor do I want to...  One facility, outside of Beijing, has set up a bakery where the patients do the baking.

Tremendous idea, in my completely uneducated opinion. I have driven by mental hospitals, so I feel qualified to comment.  It keeps the folks doing something productive, in addition to questionable conventional therapy, so you have happier, better adjusted patients.

There will be problems, of course.

• The insurance will demand all the proceeds, plus a per-cookie copay.
• Patients will have to get insurance precertification each time they put something in the oven
• There is great difficulty getting corporate sponsorship: "Buy Bob's Flour - the official flour of mental patients"

The workforce will be eager, for the most part, but not without its issues...

The addicts will eat all the cookies dough.
The bipolars work the fastest, except when they're crying under the table.
The depressed don't show up.
The schizophrenics refuse to work because the oven is talking about them.
The narcissists spend their time trying to make their face the official logo, and do no productive work. They make great leaders.
The multiples bake, then the kids come out and eat. COOKIES!!

"There ought to be limits to freedom." - George W. Bush

Today I identify as  the button you push to make the traffic light turn green

• Know what's sad? I'm listening to online radio and hear this really interesting song. It sounds very complex. It's King Crimson. It's called Improvisation. They play better improv than I play Real Songs.

Dennis Muilenburg, CEO of Boeing, has stepped down, effective immediately.
Either that, or he was fired, depending on who you ask.
It might have something to do with the 737 MAX's refusal to stay in the air and the 14 month Failure Dance around getting it cleared.

• Amazon had plans for driver safety training. 
• "We chose not to have onroad practical training because it was a bottleneck" to getting drivers on the road, a senior manager wrote.

88% of Americans use a second screen while watching tv.

Ouch. We've normalized A.D.D. have you seen her Instagram page? 

• London is using new electric buses. Because they have no incredibly loud diesel engine, the buses needed a noise to make people aware of their presence to avoid collisions (because a humongous 2 story vehicle is apparently not enough)
• I think they're going in the wrong direction. Make the buses more quiet. Think of it as Darwinism's hearing test.

A New Zealand electrician fired for declining to use a face-scan system was awarded $23,200. This is truly inspiring, but will disappear in smoke when he can't sue the New Zealand government for the same thing.....

It's the first holiday season without my father.

He wasn't a particularly tall guy, but his presence was huge.

I cannot accurately describe the non-presence. Like people sitting on a couch, but there's a large blank spot, with no actual couch there.

We're not exactly a big holiday family, but we had one day of celebration. He enjoyed being a patriarch, in his own way. He was a merry patriarch.

I didn't get to the party this year, but I can only imagine the large, unspoken hole in the room.

Regardless of anything else, we admire my mom's strength. I can't begin to imagine...  perhaps her mental decline is some sad sort of gift. 

Somebody said we're mourning two losses.....

We Need to Have a Talk. About Your Pancreas.

To my readers:
Happy Whatever
Put the Flying Spaghetti Monster back in Christmas

Be with family and friends.
Exchange good will.
Drink.
Eat.
Be merry. If you can't be merry, be miserable.
Get drunk.
Curse members of your family.
Remember: it's always darkest before the lights go out completely.
Don't forget, kids: xmas is one of the most depressing times of the year.


And if you're feeling particularly miserably depressed, reach out.





Why is there glitter on my keyboard?
I'm the only one who uses it.
I don't own any glitter.


As happens on most days, I'm sitting there, minding my own business at work, when a meeting pops up. This isn't anywhere near as bad as most places... my boss grew up as a tech, so meetings are short, informative, and to the point. However, and there's always a however, non-boss meetings do not conform to that style. They're virtual, so we have to sit there, nodding our heads, while the lights blink and we sing songs of loyalty to our employer.

No, wait, I mean we sit there, noting some sound is coming out of the speaker, and do something productive. Yeah, that's it - productive. Then we check the speaker again, to make sure no one said our name or we don't need to go THAT'S RIGHT, YEAH!

Naturally this was one of the second kind of meetings.
This job is just slightly weird. This is a grave improvement over most of my other jobs, especially the Twilight Zone<tm>, where each meeting existed solely to go over the last meeting, then schedule the next one. This place doesn't like meetings quite that much, but there are still too many; like flu shots or appendectomies.

Last month's meeting was to go over documentation. Did you know that there's a Format<tm> for documentation? Not only is there a format, there's a person. You put together the documentation, send it to her, she marks the incorrect bits in red and returns it to you to fix. So there I was, with a document all in red, even though I had followed the 234 page Style Guide. I thought it was some sort of test... I had the brilliant idea to document something for the next people to get hired, and they 'subtly' discouraged me by telling me it was all wrong. It turns out I was right. No matter how correct the document is, they like to bounce it back to you a few times.

Along those lines, this meeting was also about documentation, but not as specifically. This was about access for people with (visual?) difficulties. A Very Serious Lady talked for several hours (no, wait, it was just one hour that felt like several hours), with a Very Serious Voice, about how our documentation, emails, and anything else has to be for any possibly otherly-sighted coworkers. I'm looking around to see if anyone else is laughing with tears in their eyes because someone's pulling a joke, but alas, no. This place lacks a sense of humor.

The Serious Lady made points about type points, type fonts, graphics, and never publish in pencil- crayon is still the default. Most shocking was the list of things we shouldn't do: underline, fonts below 37.5 points, color, type while not sitting in an ergonomically correct chair, typing on a Monday, and the greatest sin of all: italics. I sat there, looking shocked, when it hit me: this total absurdity is actually part of the meeting format: say completely bizarre things and people will stop Faceyspaces surfing because they're filled with horror. They will actually tune IN because they can't believe what they just heard. Did she really say italics? Are my emails going to have to be in crayon too? What's the font we have to use on Monday, and what happens if there's a holiday on Monday?

Toward the end of the meeting, she was telling us why fonts are important and which bits of them give people trouble. An idea occurred to me.. there are fonts specifically for dyslexic people. I'm sure no one knows about them and they are not the required fonts for the other differently-abled people. If I asked the question, would the entire panel explode? Because I was in that mood.

• Ketamine is showing promise against depression. Sorta.

Dear lefty:

• Why does your wife do all the food shopping?
• Because she's tired of eating ice cream, soda, and candy bars every day.

There's this show that someone told me to watch. It's about aliens, so naturally it was on the History channel. I remember this in great detail, but of course I can't remember what it was called. No.. wait.. Alien Highway (I think).

At some point, there was a guy who might have had an experience with something in the past. They brought in a hypnotist, who put the guy under. Apparently this poor man took a ride with some short gray beings, which he filed away somewhere because it terrified him. While this is going on, the investigators are in the next room, asking if they should pull the guy out of hypno because he's really upset. Because these guys know better than the hypnotist, who does this for a living.

One of the main investigators was a young lady who was a Ghostbuster in her last show. When the men are out, in the cold, hunting aliens, she was in the basement, running around with her Ghostometer, asking if extraterrestrials where there. Fortunately she didn't have to learn too many lines, because on Ghostbusters, she ran around with her Ghostometer, asking if ghosts were there.  It was pretty funny when the guys were running around in the snow. They set up a trail cam and an alarm cam. When they went back to check them, the trail cam's strap had a huge twig in it and was missing a battery. The alarm cam was pointed in the other direction from where they left it. One guy looked puzzled and the other put on his best Serious Look.

The truth about this is that are all sorts of aliens: grays, reptilians, and congress. There are also the little known Joker Aliens. These guys are very smart and able to look just like any of the other aliens, humans, or the 1980s American Motors Pacer. Their thing is traveling around, messing with ufo investigators. It's about all they do after discovering free energy. All their needs are met, they got bored, and now they trawl the universe(s), messing with investigators and other aliens.  Earth is one of their favorite targets, with a population of paranoids, a dollop of deniers, and a government that wouldn't admit that it's light out during the day.

One of their favorite gags was cattle mutilation.
"Hey, I got it.. let's do weird shit to those cow-things. We'll exsanguinate, tear off random bits, and get this - core out their anus!" [mass laughter - especially the anus] "We'll turn off our invisibility shield and make sure they can see us, so they think it's the grays. For good measure, we'll put a cow in the tractor beam, so one poor farmhand, who speaks little English, gets to watch it rise. Then he'll try, desperately, to relate this to the farmer and the police."  [more laughter]

"Wait - I got another one..... we'll dress up as grays, abduct them from their bedrooms, then do silly things to them, under the guise of physical examinations. When we snatch them, we put everyone else in stasis, so no one believes they were abducted."

"Anus. Anus. ANUS. ANUS..." went the chant.

"Why is it always the anus with you guys?"

"Remember Clinton?"  [more laughter]

"Ok, anus. We'll probe their anus. With a special tool Bob made out of a wooden spoon and some tin foil. When they wake up, we start making bleeping noises and throw our voices so they think we're talking in their head. When we get them back, no one will believe them. And they'll blame the grays. That will teach those short little bastards to date our sisters."  [applause]

"Tell us about this Men in Black thing you were thinking about."

"Ok, well, after the 'abduction', the police show up. After the police, we send three dudes in black suits, all looking alike and official, to tell them to keep their mouths shut. Then we steal some silverware and get out. This way everybody blames the government, which couldn't possibly know who got taken or visited."

"Wasn't there more?"

"Oh yeah, we keep visible, so the jets and helicopters will chase us. Naturally we'll leave them in the dust, then disappear."  [applause]

"Remember the royal family - that was hysterical!" [crowd falls over]

"That was a good one. We took video of them and added a tiny little segment where they turned into reptilians. Of course WE were the reptilians." [standing ovation]

"I know everyone's off duty tonight, but you're all invited to the main deck, cuz we're gonna buzz the White House again. Anyone in?"  [all hands go up] "They spent 50 years denying it after the last time we did it. This time we're going to get the banner that says WE'RE ALIENS, STUPID and hang it from the tail of the ship."  [no more... we can't breathe!!!!]


[why do people think I have too much time on my hands?]



Today I identify as an old glove compartment key, way back when they were separate from the ignition key.

• Dear Mandarin Phone Spammers/Scammers: you might get more hits if you try English. My Mandarin is rusty.
• I'm about to go to a whitelist-only phone system, where all calls are rejected by default. Since about 7 people have my number, I won't ever have to worry about it ringing again.

How about those wacky feds?
They got a warrant for 1,500 phones within a certain area, to work on an arson case.  I'd be shocked, but the only shocking thing is that they got a warrant first. Google defends itself by saying it only gives out info when asked by law enforcement.  In the meantime, turn off your location services, and possibly your phone.

• Boeing is thinking about suspending production of its 737 Max, due to their propensity to stop flying in midair.
• On the positive side, Boeing will introduce the 738 Max.

Boeing 7378

A man from country X commits rape. The identitarian right blames all people from country X, and the identitarian left blames all men. Identity politics is poison  - twitter

Do you enjoy arguing with people on social media?
Of course you do - that's how everyone communicates on social media.
I've just spent a few weeks, on a few services, discussing Dissociative Identity Disorder (multiple personality disorder) with 'experts'. All of them told me DID doesn't exist. Alrighty then. They gave all sorts of scientific-sounding reasons why it didn't exist. Alrighty then again. One of my favorites is that the patients are faking it and/or attention-seeking. With the last estimate at about 1 million people with DID, that's an awful lot of attention seekers.

Another is that the therapists led the patients. It's possible that some did, maybe a long time ago, but let's be serious... It's been in the psych disorders manual (DSM) for the last 2 volumes. It's being treated all over the world. The CIA admitted it created Manchurian Candidates (multiples) for spying after they got caught and had to appear before Congress. There are entire facilities to treat DID (or there were - insurance is a bitch).

The 'experts' pelted me with their scientific proof.
I deliberately kept my mouth shut to see how far they'd go.

My wife has DID.
I know many people who have DID - there are at least 5 in my area of the city. There's still a lot of broken people running around the US and Toronto because that's where the CIA did their torture experiments. There are support groups for DID. There are support groups for significant others of DID.

Are you seriously going to tell me my wife's faking a disorder she had no knowledge of? Or that she's attention-seeking? Or that a number of docs who diagnosed her were wrong? That she's not losing time? That there aren't times when things get done that she didn't do? That random people don't 'pop out' and talk? Or that her main therapist was not only wrong, but she led my wife to have the disorder?  Ooh, sorry - I was there. She led nothing. Her first doc said he didn't believe in DID. He had to change his mind when she was getting better with DID therapy.

When I told my wife they didn't believe in DID, she suggested they spend a week at our house. This is one of the reasons I married her.

Speaking of the professionals, people who are allegedly faking DID cannot possibly do some of the things people with DID do. My wife went to the optometrist and asked about colored contact lenses. The doctor said probably not, as her eyes changed color 8 times. The alters have different voices, different genders, different gaits, and different abilities/disabilities. In some cases, one alter may know a foreign language that no one ever learned. Would this be possible if people were faking it?

Someone please save us from the 'professionals.' I shouldn't have to argue with them online. I am not in the psych field, I have no degrees or college education, and I pass out at the sight of blood. All I am is a guy who tried like hell to advocate for his wife (and others) for over 25 years. 

• Do you use Firefox? I do.  Here's 15 keyboard shortcuts to speed up your tasks

Mice watching film noir prompted a study.
Neurons didn't respond reliably.
Thus proving mice are immune to film noir, and therefore, superior.
They're in charge too (of life.. the universe... and everything).

• JBL's new solar-powered headphones promise 'virtually unlimited' battery life.
• The disclaimer states that this does not apply in Philadelphia, because the sun rarely shines.
• This also applies to sun roofs and solar lighting in Philly.

Best headline: IBM tailors Swift relationship....

Heroes of the Stupid

In El Paso, Texas, an older male kidnapped 79 people to anally probe them, while disguised as an alien.




SJW Dribblings

I'm always shocked at white people's ability to nonchalantly walk in the rain like it's not raining. But I guess when you've bathed in bloodshed for centuries, a little water doesn't change much.   - Lor on Twitter

British tech workers propose a fine or jail for anyone calling them boffins, geeks, or eggheads. It's Hate Speech!

Tonight at the Wells Fargo Center: The Cancerous Cockers

Please update your operating systems and everything else you use. A ton of vendors have released patches for serious vulnerabilities.



After reviewing the series, I've decided that the Lifetime Achievement in Acting Award should go to John Astin, for his portrayal of Gomez Addams. He simply was Gomez. Even in other roles, he was still Gomez.

Curious, I looked Lurch up. Ted Cassidy's biggest role was Lurch, but he acted in other shows and did a lot of voiceovers. He was also a newsman, reporting during the JFK assassination. At 6'9" (259 grams British), he towered over other actors (and most other things, except certain tall trees and Alec Baldwin's ego).



Dear lefty:

• What did it take to be a successful musical comic?
• After spending over 15 years in the business, I have no friggin idea. I'll let you know, should I become one.

Signs You're Getting Old

You find yourself watching ancient reruns of Laugh-In. And they refer to the future as 1990.

You discover a tv station that runs 1970s game shows. And you watch it.

As a teen,  you had the LOUDEST stereo in the entire city. Now you scream, "TURN THAT NOISE DOWN!"

Dazed and Confused is no longer a Led Zeppelin song - it's your reality.

You remember Cher's original face

You know Robin Williams said "Nanoo nanoo."

Social Media involved a modem and dialup bulletin boards (BBSes)

You had to look stuff up in a strange building called a library.

Yes, of Course

If you get a chance, check out the Yes, Live at the Apollo video.

It was a very pleasant surprise... featuring Rick Wakeman, Trevor Rabin, and Jon Anderson. Who the hell knows how many different versions of Yes there were.  Rabin was excellent - I had no idea. He handled Steve Howe parts, as well as his own stuff, with grace and accuracy. Everything the members did was spot on and I'm not a rabid Yes fan.

If you're not fond of Yes, I highly recommend avoiding it.

• How is the current cancerous cocker? Penny is a little subdued the day after her chemo, but doing well. 

WTF is going on with the Boeing 737 Max crashes and the FAA review?

Don't we all have a 100% interest in keeping the planes in the air?

Boeing claims no knowledge of the flaw in testing.

Some pilots claim they spoke to Boeing before the crashes.

I've heard it said that Boeing failed to explain a feature/function to pilots, but don't understand the whole story well enough to say.

• Congrats to our president, for refusing to sign an international agreement on curbing 'hate speech' and extremism on social media. It's freedom of speech, plus the government has no business there.
• On the other side, the president asked for stories of censorship on social media. Again, the government has no business there. They are private entities.

Certain things we don't need to see on tv or magazines:

Underwear and lingerie for fat women (Curvy is the PC term).

Bladder leak panties on a model.

Cellulite hiding products, featuring a large woman with cellulite.

Cosmetic products claiming most people felt it did what it was claimed to do. In small letters, they disclose that it was 77% of 32 people. It didn't even have to work - the people just felt it worked.