Showing posts with label pedophilia. Show all posts
Showing posts with label pedophilia. Show all posts

Friday, August 14, 2020

Bears Sniffing Hairs


Vacationing in Beirut
Don't.


My old boss used to sniff a coworker's hair.
She thought it was a little weird.
We thought it was a lot weird.
He died. Probably from sniffing too much hair product.
Now that I think of it, she died too, possibly from using too much hair product.


Your love is like  an anvil to the big toe.



Public Service Announcement

If you haven't already, go online to your cell phone provider's site and review your plan. You never know what kind of crap you've been signed up for or how your private information is being shared. In theory, you can manage it online;

I needed to change my plan. It suggested 2 other plans that were ridiculous and nothing else. Ah, the convenience of online service. When I used the phone to call, they were closed for the day. But they want me to know they're there for me.

Got a Chromebook?
Set it on fire. It's another goog 'innovation' that sends them your data.
If the fire option isn't for you, there are linux distributions that install just fine...



For most of the summer, I dread that there will be a winter.
The only good thing I can think of is the lawnmowers will stop.



Speaking of neighbors, we will soon bid goodbye to one of the nicer neighbors we have: the ex-service paranoid schizophrenic with the weapons. Living proof that just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they aren't out to get you. We spent many a night yelling at the helicopters over our houses (they just hovered there). He thought the motorcycles were up and down the street to harass him. I think the motorcycles are up and down the street to harass the entire neighborhood, with their ear-splitting noise. He's a really good guy and we'll miss him. Meanwhile there's still the 439 year old monster who stays awake at night, thinking of ways to annoy us, and the 90 year old sweetheart who still mows the lawn. This will not happen to me: I don't want to mow the lawn now, no less doing it when I reach that age.



There is now a committee on how to identify brain death.  We non-doctoral-type people, who drink expensive coffee drinks and think we know it all, say you can probably identify brain death with an electroencephalogram (EEG), or if they're in Congress.  We dare not suggest this, or the World Brain Death Project will lose its funding. Then they would have to go back to drinking expensive coffee drinks.



Dear lefty:

  • What do you get when you cross an octopus with a tarantula?
  • Your mother.


Because it feels so good when we stop  

Lafayette, Colorado, just paid a ransom for their ransomware problem, saying it was more cost effective than rebuilding from scratch. 

When will these elected idiots learn? They won't.
When will action come from above? That's the only way this will be helped in any fashion. Networks need to be secured, securely backed up, and the employees TRAINED to look out for phishing and malware.

But you have to admire the criminals pricing their crime at below the cost of restoring things.



Told you so. Again.   

Google Home devices 'accidentally' recorded your every word. Oops. Sorry.

Q. When will you get rid of this spying menace that you paid for?
A. You kiddin' me? It reminds me when The Masked Furry is on.



Airline shares surged Monday after federal data showed air travel at the highest volume in nearly five months and as political support grew for more federal aid for the struggling sector.
They anticipate a $25 billion relief package.
Well, we bailed out the auto industry. We bailed out the banks. Now we know who's next. 




Vermin Supreme (TM) @VerminSupreme
The mental health issues related to our lockdown and the pandemic are especially hard for people with depression. NAMI, The National Alliance on Mental Health have a 24 hour helpline: 800-950-6264.



In another peaceful Seattle evening, someone drove his white car into a building, probably a store, going by the cheering. Then he did it again, to more cheering. I assume the driver went home and set his house on fire. Unless he stole the car first.


  • I heard someone say "The mechanic just called.... the total is only $1200!" It's the little things.


An online dress code was imposed on an Illinois school district. Pajamas are no longer allowed. Also, a desk is recommended - not laying in bed. It's a good thing kids are doing so well, in these days of The Flying AIDS, that we're worried about how the little so-and-so's are dressed.

Let's take an imaginary trip, back to our time in school....
Ever have that dream.. the one where you're in front of people.. with no pants?
What kind of masochist would appear in his virtual class in pajamas? The normal social order of laughing at people and bullying should work this issue out on its own.  * Except for the cheerleading squad, which can wear however much or little it wants.



Vladimir Putin claims a Flying AIDS vaccine is ready.
Now who do you trust more - Vladimir "Disappear Them" Putin or Bill "Windows Them" Gates.
Ugh.



I've been telling everyone that pedophilia goes up to the highest levels.
60 Minutes Australia exposes pedophilia up to and including Parliament. It's not a particularly pleasant video to watch, but you need to. Don't think it's limited to the UK. A male prostitute ring was signed in and went through the White House on Bush's watch. The elite use children and the practice must be stopped.







Friday, June 14, 2019

Trump Takes Up Meditation

Apparently the Boy Scouts have a very serious pedophile problem. People are coming forward and telling their stories.  Who the hell do they think they are - the church?



  • Leslie Van Houten, one of the Manson Family, has been denied parole for the third time. For some reason, Charlie's Angels aren't very interesting - perhaps it's the lack of carving things into their foreheads. Charlie, on the other hand, was always amusing (after jail only). You could count on good old Charlie to say or do something stupid, like Joe Biden.
  • But seriously, if you're bored, check Charlie out. His childhood pretty much guaranteed his adulthood would be 'interesting'. Not quite this interesting, though. The eyes say it all. One wonders if he had any 'help' becoming so persuasive.


Philly government, jealous of how long Baltimore has been non-operational due to ransomware, stepped right up and got virused. This is the first time Philly government has stepped up to do anything. Currently the court system is the only one affected, but the other departments are making appointments to plug into their network.

Rumor has it that the IT systems are being run by illegal aliens the mayor gave Sanctuary status.



Dear lefty:
  • How many angels fit on the head of a pin?
  • Do you do anything besides masturbate?


A Washington man called the police after a prostitute would not leave, preventing him from going to church. It was her 'come to Jesus' moment....



  • Another mission into the jungle with my nemesis, the mower. It's bleedin' 2019 - has every child in the area found a better job? Back in Frozen Tundra Season, one enterprising youth went around with a shovel, charging a lot of money. This smart fella probably bought a lot of goodies on Amazon (or drugs) that night. This is one child in twenty years. The rest are probably shoveling in enhanced reality online games.
  • Time Warp is in effect, with the young couple across the way sending their kids out to shovel the walks of their older neighbors (or else). I offer to pay, but noooooooo. I want to offer to do my elderly neighbor's lawn, but it's an inhuman struggle to do mine. Plus the lady enjoys mowing. Perhaps I should have her do my lawn too. She's only 89, fer chrissake. A young 89. Apparently she doesn't see mowing as The Job From Hell. 
  • Perhaps I was bitten by a lawnmower when I was little.



Wife bemoaned having to drink powdered milk as a child. 
I had to drink instant water.



  • After watching a child get very excited over a new toy, I realized it doesn't happen to me anymore.



Faceyspaces' employees held a mass protest over nipple censorship.
Never has a protest struck so closely to my heart....



  • A Florida (well it's about time) man covered his sleeping girlfriend in ketchup, believing that she had been cheating on him. He should really try oil or chocolate syrup. Oh. Never mind.
  • A Florida woman stabbed herself repeatedly because she's "tired of living in Trump's country".  Under law, she can be involuntarily committed to the Happy Place as a danger to herself. I've seen this referred to as Trump Derangement Syndrome.
  • A Florida man was arrested after trying to flee police, only to wind up in the middle of a law enforcement convention.





Trump Goes to Blighty
As you can't help but see and hear, the president went to England.
The president's people (including Fox News) say it was to pay a visit to our best global partner and discuss economics.  

The queen, who just turned 147, kept asking her assistants who the tall guy with the funny hat is. They kept explaining that it was not a hat on his head, but gave up after a while. After meeting, she referred to Trump as Elizabeth. No one knows why, but Trump tweeted he'd be the best Elizabeth England has ever seen.

The Ministry of Silly Hats took a small vacation, as the ladies' hats made it in just under ceiling level, which is frightfully small for England. Like him or not, the First Lady is stunning. The others laughed at her because her hat was so small, it fit under the door frame.

The amount of Englanders taking exception to the president was so loud, you'd think he was their president. 

The press was very British, treating the visit with respect.
The US press was 94% negative. CNN took a moment out from "Everything he did wrong" to bring on an English journalist, who said Trump actually behaved himself.  It was CNN/NBC/everyone vs Fox. None were watchable. 

If the president made an announcement that anthrax is fatal, 50% of the country would be dead overnight. The headlines would say "Trump Kills Half the Country."  When he won the election, the headline was "Hillary Loses." 

Not that there weren't gaffes..... Trump kept referring to Prince Charles as Jug-Ears and had to dodge Lady Camilla's advances, which got more brazen over the night, with the application of alcohol. He spoke to many decorated war veterans and asked his people if this was the war on the beach. In a speech, he referred to WWII as the Great War, the Best War, and said England was Winning. 

Piers Morgan interviewed the president, with respect, then presented him with a bowler. The joke was on Trump, as the rules state no one over 5'7" (50 British pounds) can wear a bowler.

Trump left the country, but only after the queen told her best filthy jokes. He said Lady 27th From The Throne Megan Markle has nice ones, but his wife had the best implants ever, of any first lady.

The American press went crazy on French President Macrone, decrying the fact that he spoke French. They demanded to taste some of his fries and his dressing.  The presidential staff had a blast, mis-translating French in Trump's earpiece. When Macrone welcomed him to the conference, the staff translated it as, "He says you're a pussy." At the end of the conference, France officially surrendered to Trump.

The following day, the president went to Ireland. You won't see much in the news, because no one could understand them. He was heard to say, "these people are almost as bad as the Welsh - they have no vowels."

All in all, it went much better than expected; England making no plans to bomb the US (because they'd have to ask permission first).



  • I like elephants. You know - not the in-person elephants... the ones on tv. Everybody loves elephants. Now take a minute and look at an elephant. What kind of drugs was evolution on when this came about? They're obviously not descended from apes. Maybe aliens. Maybe the aliens were on something when they were here. A trunk? Where else in nature???
  • Don't get me started on aardvarks.





the new iDevice STAND is $999

Friday, December 15, 2017

A Three Hour Tor

TOR, otherwise known as The Onion Router, is a reasonably secure internet platform. When I say reasonably secure, I mean it's safe to route all of your traffic through it, but if you have incredibly sensitive information, you run a risk of being discovered. That aside, Snowden and Assange use it and the NSA is having trouble spying on it (but still manages). The safest way is to boot from and use the Tails operating system. The link has some good basic information on TOR. You can try it out with the TOR browser. Download the browser here. It's Firefox, so you already know how to use it. Give it a shot. Try not to install any extensions/addons because some of them leak information, rendering the browser unsafe.


  • Over 460 models of HP laptops come complete with a keylogger. This means that every letter you type could be logged. Fortunately, this 'feature' is disabled by default. It exists in the touchpad driver. If anybody gets access to the computer, they can turn the keylogger on.

The FDA has approved a pill with an embedded sensor that can report when it is swallowed.  This is very interesting and, as I understand it, only one pill. Let's put on our Thermionic Tin Foil Hats.  Any invasive technology tends to come disguised as a benefit: 

  • "Oh - we'll know if Gramma took her medicine!"
  • "Stupid drug addict brother didn't take his methadone today."
  • "Yes, as you know, Doctor, I took my meds, but I'm still hearing the voices. They do not like you."

The pill sends a signal to a patch, which sends the information to an app on your phone. You can send the results to a number of people if you like. How is this wrong? Let me count the ways...
  • Bluetooth: hackable in the vicinity
  • Sensor: is it really safe n your body? Do you really need it? 
  • App: fitness apps and most others transmit information up the line to the software's author, advertising, and Google or Apple.
  • No one really needs your information.

British television seems to consist largely of a bunch of overstuffed people sitting on an overstuffed couch, talking about nothing but using a lot of words to get there. No wonder they like some of our shows (Seinfeld).

  • Over thirty email clients, including webmail, have a pretty serious flaw that will allow a Bad Guy to spoof the FROM address convincingly. Read this to see if yours is affected. Several were fixed before the flaw was announced.

In the 1980s, AT&T asked a consultant to estimate how many cell phones would be in use in the world by 2000. They concluded the total market would be 900,000 units. This persuaded AT&T to pull out of the market. By 2000, there were 738 million people with cellphone subscriptions. So close....


  • a thirteenth human foot was found washed up on Canada's west coast. No one is sure why this happens but no foul play is suspected. No foul play? How many appendages, organs, and severed heads have to wash up before foul play is suspected? And what happened to the fourteenth foot? Isn't Canada supposed to be friendly? Does this sort of thing go on all the time in British Columbia?

Time grows near for the FCC's decision on whether to keep or jettison the Net Neutrality rules. While they haven't explicitly stated it, the FCC really doesn't care what you think and has no problem clinking drinks with Big Business. After having found millions of fake comments on the topic, the FCC is blocking any investigation into the comments, which, incredibly, were from dead people and were against neutrality. Nothing at all is suggested by this wild coincidence.


  • A bunch of years ago I went to a guitar show with a Gibson Custom Shop display. I asked the guy if they had ever built any lefty doublenecks. He said he was aware of four, and at that date, they would cost about $5,000. Right handed, of course, was less. Today I finally located a Custom Shop lefty Doubleneck on Ebay, for the bargain price of $8,000. Ok, everything this shop sells is pretty damn expensive, plus shipping from Asia. I'm sure I can get it cheaper by ordering locally.
  • I know, I know, you don't care. But Jimmy Page plays one.
  • We got what we wanted most for the holidays: Marshall, alive. Because of this, we've had to cancel Christmas.
  • But a new guitar (or three) sure would be nice

Gibson Custom Shop lefty EDS-1275



In Road Wars, a British COPS-like show, they pulled a car over, checked the trunk, and found 'herbal cannabis'. Herbal, pronouncing the 'H'. When I was young, I did my share of substances, but I am not aware of any variety other than herbal. Did they invent some sort of Imitation Cannabis? Why in the universe do they call it cannabis when 'Pot' is one syllable?

One day on COPS, an officer found "some sort of green, leafy substance; possibly cannabis." Do police recruit from just one pool? Has someone been peeing in it again?

  • A Harvard student recently made a bold public declaration, admitting that, while at a bar with friends one time, he talked about the attractiveness of the women in his class. What a brave man. If anybody overheard him, he'd be publicly lynched.

Researchers, which is a term for anyone having more than one account on a website, have estimated that up to one percent of sites on the web have been hacked. For those of us who like math (and I know no one who meets this description) that's about 10 in 1,000 of the most visited websites. This statistic proves nobody is above or immune to hacking, and you will probably visit one of these sites, if not the entire one percent.


  • I have seen into the future. Come next June, a newspaper headline will read "America Saves Millions as Half of Congress Arrested for Pedophilia"