The War on War

War on everything is getting boring, deadly, and horribly expensive.  I propose the War on War.

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Just in case you don't think your tax dollars aren't being properly transferred to the Military Industrial Complex, let's take a run over to Afghanistan, where the troops we're training to take over after we leave are killing each other.  You know, if they just stayed there and we just stayed here, they could keep killing each other forever, as they have been doing for longer than we have been a country.

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Marcus Banwell got caught shoplifting in a rather painful way - right after throwing up some Scotch Bonnet peppers (arguably the hottest available).  These peppers are so hot you need to cut them with gloves on.

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There was another shooting, this time in New York.  Before the gun-grabbers continue their insane wailing, I'd like to point out that Mayor "Please Protect Us from Soda" Bloomberg stated that some of the shooting victims were shot by the police.

Perhaps we need a War on Police.

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According to a study, full-frontal nudity on television is up 6300% this year.   Well, that's news to me.  I don't recall ever seeing full-frontal nudity on television, unless I was watching porn.    The key to the story is yet another group trying to save us from the evils of the semi-naked body.  Yes, they're referring to pixellated naked people, not real naked people.  By this logic, everyone on tv is naked - their clothes are in place of the pixellation.

Heaven help us from people helping us into heaven.

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The yahoos with whom I toil daily are having a fantasy football draft today.  If I hear one more word about sports today, I'm going to perform the Emesis Dance upon the lot of them.

People call me nerdy, yet they're spending hours arguing over sports teams that aren't real.  Perhaps when they're done (if they ever get done), we'll argue about whose god is better.

Meanwhile, I'm having my own fantasy porn star draft.  Who's winning now?

High Fructose Corn Syrup Til We Die!

The mayor of New York has spoken and it is apparent that someone needs to politely ask him to submit to an IQ test then a reality test.  I do not want to come right out and call Mayor Bloomberg an idiot because that's an ad-hominem attack.

The reason I question his sanity is that unconstitutional legislation should not be put through as law and (hopefully) most of us realize that banning large size sodas is clearly unconstitutional.  I don't care about his lofty ideals: the law is unconstitutional.

In addition to unconstitutional, the law goes against common sense and everything our founding fathers fought for.  Let's face it: no one wants anyone to get fat.  But that's not the point here.  The point is the incessant Nanny-State-ism being foisted upon us by our kleptocracy (aka government).

Will Bloomberg or his minions be there to intercept the Twinkie as it heads to our gaping mouth?
Will all windows in New York be ordered shut because someone might jump?
Will the fine for jaywalking be increased to the death penalty?
Will the mayor personally put his foot under your gas pedal to make sure you don't exceed the speed limit?

It's bad enough that our rights are being eaten at a record rate.  Let's not have the government `protecting' us also.

Remember - George Washington fought for our right to gorge ourselves until our heart gives up out of sheer hopelessness.




P.S. the First Lady approves of the mayor's ban, while talking out the other side of her mouth about a federal ban.