Showing posts with label romney. Show all posts
Showing posts with label romney. Show all posts

Thursday, September 21, 2023

Half the Number of Pickles in Your Shed


Your love is like  a house key through the kidney.0



A key cold medicine ingredient is basically worthless

like Congress

 

  • I've been reading the blog stats, which leaves me with one question: why am I reading the blog stats? 


Ex-Secret Service agent reveals new JFK assassination detail

Agent says an additional bullet kills the single bullet lie theory. Like anybody believes a bullet can defy physics. The agent only released this information after his lawyers assured him that his Non-Disclosure Agreement did not apply after death, and even if it did, it was not enforceable. My thoughts: if you see Dick Cheney in the afterlife, you're in the wrong place for eternity.

The formerly living President Gerald Ford admitted to moving the bullet impact a few inches to fit their conclusion. Ford had a bad time of it, also reimbursing the family of Frank Olsen after the CIA pushed him out of a window. The CIA's score: making a Manchurian Candidate - 1. Documenting man's failure to fly - 1. Being held responsible for their actions - 0.

 

  •  If the gunmen around the Grassy Knoll were a little less capable, they all could have hit LBJ.

CIA bribed its own COVID-19 origin team to reject lab-leak theory, anonymous whistleblower claims

Oh, dear, now which information is disinformation that President Giveaway told Big Tech to block?



  • Google Says It’s No. 1 Search Tool Because Users Prefer It to Rivals
  • Windows is #1 because users don't know any better
  • which one of these statements is true? 
But seriously - if Internet Explorer and Google are monopolies, why isn't Windows?



Canada warns LGBT travellers of US risks

Canada is a strange place, with an even stranger Prime Minister. I see where they're going, but the warning is completely disingenuous. LGBT folks can visit all they want without risk. If they decide to get married in certain states, they could experience difficulty. I'm not sure what the legalities are, but I don't see Canadians fleeing their oppressive regime to get married in Alabama. At very least they should go to Las Vegas, where Elvis will marry them. LGBT people should also avoid open-carrying guns in most states, except Texas, which doesn't like them. Texas turned Trudeau away, stating that they will only see him if he dresses in men's clothes.




Doggie Hospital - end 

Our furry child is coming home today and will continue treatment here. The platelets (little plates) were horrifically low and are now up to merely alarming. In a few day's they'll be very concerning, followed by low-we better check this out. As for the bill.... well... we're paying for a new wing at the hospital. I will ask to at least name it after her.

Someone said to me, "You really can't get a break."
Although this person did not offer money, there is nothing quite like validation.



Senator Mitt Romney urges Biden and Trump to 'stand aside' for 2024

Biden said, "Ok, where's aside?"

Trump said, "Who's Romney?" 


Hilfiger, Victoria's, and Adidas torpedoed their own brands this week, at New York Fashion Week.

They figured they could suck up with inclusion: 70+ models had disabilities. Let's think about this for a second... even fat models are used sparingly, because nobody wants to look at them. How will people feel about the girl missing a leg? Or a head?

 


 



Tuesday, November 6, 2012

Let's Vote! and other stuff...

Today we vote.  Or rather we should vote.

I have seen articles stating why your vote doesn't matter and theories about why it might.  I even wrote here, stating that we third party voters are pretty popular these days.  Most of the polls show the Evil Twins<tm> Romney and Obama neck and neck.  My boss, the portable democratic strategist, states that we are going to see a rerun of the 2000 elections, where it will be decided in the courts.

I am going to vote my conscience.  A vote for the lesser evil is a vote wasted.

Before you pull the lever or write in a name, I want you to ponder these events past:


  • the Patriot Act
  • the auto `bailout'
  • the banker `bailout'
  • the NDAA (your president can order you dead with no process)
  • Free Speech Zones
  • rapidly expanding government, in size and scope
  • even more `spreading democracy' (our troops in foreign lands)

The Evil Twins are in close agreement on the above.   Where does this leave us?

Do what you must.


===========================


Now that the expected unpleasantness is through, I wanted to bring you the best of today's news.


Things are in bad shape in New Jersey and New York.  On Craigslist you can now find people trading gas for sex.  My Hotness Level would be through the roof if I had a few spare gallons.....


Staten Island wants to thank you for your generous donations of clothes.  In fact, they don't need more clothes; they need underwear.


A Des Moines, Iowa store has a message for the Secret Service.


An observable miracle in modern jurisprudence was observed recently in Cleveland.  A woman who drove on the sidewalk to get around a school bus must stand on the corner wearing a sign that says 
"Only an idiot drives on the sidewalk to avoid a school bus."
I suspect if more cases were decided this way, there would be more people with signs and less idiots behind the wheel.  In fact, this might actually eliminate traffic jams!


And lastly, Bill Clinton asks, "Who wants a president who will lie to you?"

Right on, Bill.  Presidents only lie when their lips are moving.

Monday, October 22, 2012

Puppies, Pussy Riot and Propaganda

The internet is full of shit.  Politicians are full of shit.  Most of us are full of shit.  To counteract all of the shit, I will occasionally post something slightly uplifting.


I see your presidential election and raise you a ten year old boy with Down Syndrome lost in the woods overnight, kept warm by puppies.  You will not beat that headline.  Ever.


&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&


Moving on from the adorable to the blasphemously adorable, it would seem that the pope is not a fan of Russia's Pussy Riot.  You know those religious icons - they all cover for their own.


&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&


And lastly, speaking of elections, here's some libertarian propaganda:




Thursday, March 29, 2012

Joyful Depression

Today's dose of realism and sarcasm is brought to you by the Drudge Report.  Please go there and catch more hilarity than I have excerpted.


COPS: Beating of white man by 6 black men may have been racially motivated...

Trust me, this came from some of their best people.


Mail carrier busted for delivering drugs along her route...

This is called initiative.  It's what the USPS lacks.


PRAVDA endorses Obama...
Calls Romney 'foul-mouthed, big-headed oaf'...


I strongly object (to endorsing Obama).


Scalia invokes 8th Amendment against reading 2,700-page Obamacare bill...

Cruel and unusual punishment to make him read it (although he'd never be covered by it)


COPS: Man Kills Wife After Dog Defecates In House...

Apparently this is wrong(?)


ALBINO RHINO beer draws human rights complaint...

Never had I imagined we'd have to watch out for the albino lobby too.  Fortunately the Stupid haven't organized (aside from Congress).  It's still politically correct to be a stupidist.


Congress urged to pass drone privacy law...

Sure - we completely disregarded your rights and allowed drones in the air.  Now we want to appear to be concerned.  It's a win-win.


Half of US Homes Own APPLE Products...

Here at ThermionicEmissions we're proud to be in the other 50%.
Friends don't allow friends to use iDevices.  Don't be an iHole.



TSA FOLLIES

TSA Manager Arrested for Running Prostitution Ring...

COPS: TSA agents trashed hotel room, fired gun from window...


The day wouldn't be complete without the latest from our uber-competent Friends in Groping.