Captivity - Day 75 The giant octopus plays basketball

SEVENTY FIVE DAYS
And I didn't start this on day 1.

It was 60 on Monday. It will be 90 for the next few days.
Good thing we can't go out, eh?

We have advanced beyond the generic gravity day, where stuff falls down, leaps out, and nothing can be held for long, and gone right into the Tripping Stage. This is a tricky one because they can co-exist. We'll be walking along and BANG, there was something on the floor that we kicked. It wasn't there before. It's like another example of one of those ghost shows, except it's real. The object appears and we kick or trip on it. It is so regular that I kick something and say, "lefty's here!"  Much like the way you can't control what you see in your hallucinations, you can't choose what you trip over. It's usually small and not a guitar at all. It's also never a 1976 Caddy, but we might have a problem getting it out the door.

In an Irony from God moment, a Philly looter who tried to blow up an ATM, blew himself up with it. There have been other explosions at ATMs. History will know our time as Revenge of the ATMs.

Next on ThermionicNews: Target stores shoot back.

Remember the movie Arthur? He's told to give her his hand. His response is "But that would leave me with one." That runs though my head every time I hear 'take a knee.'

encrusting kleptoparasite

same thing

Wait.... do you hear that?
It's the sound of SILENCE!
Not one mower or construction noisemaker.
I hear birds - and not the ones from the medicine.
The 90 year old lady was mowing yesterday (I should be ashamed, but I can't work myself up to it)
The people down the street, who run electric tools all day and night are away on vacation. So they hired a friend's construction company to come by daily and run some equipment for the neighbors. I'm proud we have this level of neighbor. You?

I take that back (you knew it was coming) - trash trucks all day.

[to Secret Service]... Does that guy know he's black?

Captivity - Day 72 Now the shoe's on the wrong hand

It's weird again.
Not only is it warm, it's light. There's not a looter in sight.
I'm like a psychotic poet.

It's so beautiful outside, there must be a tornado on the way.


I feel really bad for releasing this, but I found out the looters' plan for tonight: at 6pm, they will loot the libraries and book stores, where they will hold a sit-in and demand the librarian read books on civil disobedience. To avoid SWAT, they will be socially distanced. So as not to cause too much damage, they will only enter buildings where the doors are unlocked. There will be no incindiery devices and no one will be allowed to smoke. TV coverage will be minimal and Crosby and Stills will play an acoustic set (Nash is undergoing 'treatment' at an undisclosed facility in California). The looters will clean up after themselves and leave donations to the library and small businesses in the area.

Today's most ironic item: in protest of the Floyd protest, Target has closed (at least 3 stores were destroyed).

The National Guard was called out in Philthydelphia and Montgomery County, where a very expensive mall is located. Do the math.  The looting started around noon today. Ever helpful, Idiot Mayor did everything but blame Trump for starting fires himself. He and Idiot Governor went on about social injustice and very little about not destroying and looting. Idiot Governor said they were working on justice, with people of color in positions.  How does this help? Are only people of color qualified for the positions? Or women?

Also, for unknown reasons, I found myself awake at 6am. This only happens for trips to the airport and showers with a friend. This must be a sign. Of what, I'm frightened. This probably means the napping will be good today.

At this hour of the morning, tv is beyond dead skunk. There's religious shows, 30 minute commercials for penis enlargers, exercise equipment with a 60 day guarantee and a 30 day guarantee that you'll never use anyway, game shows from the 1970s, religious shows, and the only thing I can stand, "Beat the Press."

Speaking of shortcuts, if you delete something, especially something important, ctrl-z will bring it back (in most programs). You didn't lose that sentence!  To avoid having to bring back text, set the program to backup frequently or do it manually (witcher hands).


Speaking of bladder leak underwear, there is a commercial for a new line of them. Well, that's nice, at least for the women who suffer from bladder leak. Oddly, there were no men. Regardless, there were models. I would guess that most people are not up for seeing bladder leak underwear commercials, no less one with models.  To put the cherry on top, some of the models are..... a little plus size. I know, I know, they want to show people they come in larger sizes, but isn't there a way to do it without showing a lady of 380lbs+ (450 litres Canadian), dancing around only in their product? Even the plus size women I know do not want to see this. We don't even want to see the 125lb models. The fashion industry lies to us by telling us most women are sizes 4-10. Can't we just believe the lie?


It's very early in the morning and gravity is up before I am. Either gravity or assault. While making coffee, a very large and very sharp knife launched itself at my foot. Great - add Mrs lefty and there are 2 things trying to kill me in the house.  Didja notice that I never type about great sums of money or expensive, old, left handed guitars arriving?

Captivity - Day 69 heh heh

I was waiting the entire captivity period to type that.
(get it - period?)

Twitter's anti-porn filters (We'll save the world from posts WE find offensive!) blocked access to Boris Johnson's chief advisor, Dominic Cummings, from gaining traction on the platform. Also caught in the filters were Nancy Nuckers, Stacy Swellows, Bill Yunt, and Steve Hardin; Johnson's Porn Advisory Board. When asked for comment, Johnson said, "We have to identify the porn before we block it."

It is a sickening color of brown and green.
Last night I got out of mowing because it was going to rain.
But WAIT... it's raining and there's still mowing. It sounds more of the electric and solo melody, but I still don't care. They're religious and if the old dude with boat and animals comes by, they'll ask him to mow, one last time.


I tried to make a point with Mrs lefty (uh-oh) last night. On days when the Precision Stereo Multi-Altitude Mowing Team isn't outside, doing their work, I now have the Precision Stereo Multi-altitude Construction Team. I don't know what they're building and I don't care. The 2 groups have coordinated so they never perform their suites on the same day. The mower team takes Monday, Wednesday and Friday, while the house team has Tuesday, Thursday, and Saturday. This way there's %&$ing NOISE every #&@ing day of the *&%ing the week. Since Mrs lefty knows the owner of the Construction team, I asked that she tell him to have the noise stopped. She looked at me, with that eyes rolled back look she always has when I talk, and said nothing. HEY - I work at home too. I have to listen to this #&@#ing noise every (#&$ing day. How about some consideration for people who telework without pneumatic equipment? AHA - we can use our lack of noise and force them to listen to it one day a week. They'll commit suicide! And we'll have a quiet neighborhood again.

Or we could call the police and tell them the construction guys are not social distancing.


My scanner program just alerted me that there were threats to behead Governor Whitmer in Micambo County. Minnesota. Are these a bunch of calls or one? Note: we do not want the woman to be hurt in any way: that's what the legal process is for.


Bad Bad Target

I think an official, impartial investigation must be opened into Target.
I don't know what they did but it was enough to piss off 2 whole groups of people in 2 different groups on 2 different nights.  Even though I don't know what Target did, I take the word of my brothers and sisters in the Floyd protests. Perhaps an impartial investigation can turn up what kind of racism or shit they have pulled on the people. It's probably the white man - crackas tryin to keep them down.

But in these days of riots and demonstration, they may be looting, but at least they're social distancing.


(RIP friends and family) It's impermissible.


if you want to listen to the police feed, go to broadcastify.com
Youtube for live video.

I hate to sound like this but PEACE. Make your point peacefully and respectfully.

Captivity -- Day 53 Dr Phil is not a doctor

Let's start with the weather:
it continues to be actually sunny. This is because the clouds are having coffee and haven't realized how sunny it has gotten. Within a short time, one of the clouds will recognize the unsupressed sun and it will all be over. And when I say all over, I mean the sun; the cold will stay with us. Yes, its May, and we're enduring February temperatures.

Idiot Governor maintains he's still in charge and will drop in with the paratroopers if any business tries to open. If he deems Dairy Queen non-essential, I'm joining the Resistance. One simply does not cut off malts for an entire area. Idiot Governor is overstepping his bounds.


The Flying AIDS is spreading in the White House.
The White House disclaims all knowledge and fault for the spread and asks why everybody attributes everything to it? It does good things too - but they never get reported.


A fight broke out at a Target after customers refused to wear facial covering (that's a mask to you and me). Idiot Governor Gavin Newsom rushed in with the 3rd Armored Division when it was discovered that one of the 2 perpetrators weren't female or a significant minority. When contacted for comment by the news, Target's official statement was that you usually have to go to Walmart for this level of hijinks.


Bible scholars claim Book of Revelation seals broken, 'Four Horsemen are ACTIVE.' Historically, the horsemen are death, war, famine, and disease. The Book of The Slightly Modified for Scaring You More Effectively, claims the seals are just fine, thank you, and people should stop their campaign against seafood. The other signs are Furries on the #1 tv show in the nation, social distancing, and over 90% of computers using Windows.


In addition to the Synchronized Stereo Mower Team that operates daily, today we have the Synchronized Stereo Airplane Brigade. There is no explanation of how their schedules managed to sync. Either it was pure coincidence, or meetings took place at a very High Level, possibly involving Pence, or someone at the White House who doesn't have the Flying AIDS (yet). Listen closely, as this is the technical part: the mowers achieve their stereo sound field by all being on the horizontal plane, with many many mowers riding at once. The planes also occupy the horizontal plane (see what I did there?) but they're at different altitudes, ergo, et al, sickly, they produce a very wide stereo field, especially when there is more than 1 plane. For whatever reason, most plane traffic involves more than 1 plane. The really good plane antics are not only louder than the Who; they knock shit off the walls. Like that picture of Aunt Fuck (RIP). There's a lot of noise for a small hood. Nowhere was there a sign for DANGER - YOU MIGHT LOSE YOUR HEARING. Actually, prospective buyers thought it said WARNING - YOU MIGHT LOSE YOUR EARRING.

Speaking of commercials, have you seen the one with the hot older models, pimping yet another Special Cream, designed to make them look 2 years younger, for the discounted price of $400 per small bottle. The shoot normally would have taken 3 minutes, but wound up taking 3 days, because they had to teach the models to say "Hyaluronic Acid."

Of Course I've Taken My Meds, Mr Dragon

There's a special place in hell reserved for people who Reply All.


Practical advice: your laptop or pc needs to breathe, like those people you keep in the basement. Over time, dust (and body parts) pile up in computers because they have fans. Fans suck. Sometimes the people in the basement do also. They tend to get all icky and can clog up, making it difficult to cool your computer. If you can't cool your computer, it will get hot. No, really. When it gets to a certain temperature, it will (hopefully) shut down. Even if it does, this is not a good thing.

Buy some canned air. Spray it on the intake side of the fan (there might be a filter). You can do this both running and off. You'll see dust (and hopefully nothing else) come out. I recommend against snorting it, but I can't tell you what to do, especially in the privacy of your own home. If things still get hot, download a manual for the pc/laptop or check YouTube, and learn how to turn a few screws to open it. While you're disassembling, put the screws in a pill bottle or convenient container. Spray again. Get the whole computer.

And please remember to feed the people in the basement. It's inconvenient to dispose of the remains. Or so I hear.

• Great news, Comcast users: Your favorite cableco is selling your viewing habits to advertising biz Comscore   Evil to their core.

TikTok 'tried to filter out videos from ugly, poor or disabled users'

also abnormal body shape, chubby, obese or too thin, ugly facial looks or facial deformities.  How many categories do you fit in?   I suspect the Inclusive Patrol will be all over this, even though the story will be forgotten by noon.

Experts Say the Internet Will Mostly Stay Online During Coronavirus Pandemic

Donate your excess bandwidth to www.bobsadultvids.com before something bad happens!


Surge in home working highlights Microsoft licensing issue: if you are not on subscription, working remotely is a premium feature

Hmmmm.... I wonder if there's an operating system that isn't licensed.... hmmm..

Dear lefty

• What should I avoid during this virus?
• Breathing

As everyone knows, I don't like much of anything.
However, I found this online radio station - BellyUp4Blues - this is one serious ass-kickin' station. It plays blues and blues-rock. You can listen at the website, through different services (Shoutcast, TuneIn, etc), or direct to your player. You'll hear some great blues and serious guitar. Stop by and give it a listen. If you like what you hear, it's listener-supported, so please make a contribution (I am). This is my go-to online station.

• American hero Buzz Aldrin turned 90 this year.
• don't tell anybody, but he's an alien.

An interview with a YouTuber whose entire channel is videos of him opening  doors (334).I'm going to change the name of this blog to "We're a World of Morons"
Who among us will be the next Internet Sensation? How about 500 videos of you pulling a lamp cord? Or your zipper? Unlocking a car door? Cleaning belly button lint? Pushing a vacuum from east coast to west coast (for charity, of course). Pulling boogies out of your nose?  It's so difficult to keep ahead of people.

• Before this next item, I want you to sit down... this is a big one.
• Microsoft has done well. (are you ok?) MS Teams has held up very well under incredible load.

Back to normal, a leaked document has the government preparing for an 18 month pandemic.



What did we learn today?

Astronauts ordered to shelter in-place in the Space Station over fears of COVID-19. NASA concerned that all earthlings breathing will send COVID into space, infecting the astronauts. The astronauts have to shelter -in-place while practicing social distancing. A rocket has been sent to the Space Station, loaded entirely with antibacterial soap.

For some reason I can't figure out, people have been asking me what I think about the virus (the Flying AIDS). I think the response is way overblown. WAY overblown. We don't need curfews and shelter in place and VA virus stations. This is a test of some kind. PA is days from a lockdown.

Target stores are reserving the first hour (Wednesdays?) for older folks and people with disabilities. Advice to Target: stock up on canes.
The airline industry wants, and will get, a bailout.
Trump wants to give everyone $1,000 shortly, then again (next month?)
I wouldn't be me if I didn't grouse about where this is coming from. $850 billion.
MEXICO is giving the US $250 billion for the emergency. I am seriously impressed. Imagine having to ask the drug gangs for that kind of cash...

I haven't heard any democratic response to the stimulus package, but let's take a guess:

• it wasn't big enough
• IMPEACH! AGAIN!
• His wife is ugly. Mrs Obama was a trendsetter and so beautiful
• The whole financial giveaway was Obama's idea.
• Trump set the virus loose, so he could come in and rescue everyone
• Pelosi is $25k beyond on her plastic surgery bill so we wrote it into the law
• Bernie said socialism works.
• Biden said "Look - I'm James Bond!"

Hold on, kids... information coming in.... several senators face calls to resign over insider trading. They found out about the virus and sold stock before bothering to tell their constituents. The article mentions two republican senators. Further information says more, including Nancy Pelosi. There's one rule for us and another rule for them. IMPEACH!

I have to admit I was wrong about something (don't tell my wife). When Trump was elected, I said the busiest people in DC would be the Secret Service. In fact, the busiest people in DC are Biden's handlers.

Half of the republicans are against the stimulus unless it goes well. at which point they'll take credit for it and stand proudly behind Trump. The other half are registering democrat. And the only guy who makes any sense is the guy with the boot on his head (Vermin Supreme).

Many fees and government restrictions are being lifted.

We're getting more libertarian by the day!

Amazon is doing so well, it's hiring 100,000 warehouse employees in the US. As if it isn't already happening, Bezos is wiping his butt with $10,000 bills. He used to used two, but his wife got half in the divorce.

Uber is shutting down its Uber pool, where Uber users ride-share.
The company is doing its best to "flatten the curve" of the virus.
Instead, you can ride with a patient on the way to the hospital.

We are going to find out about all sorts of technology in the weeks to come.
For instance, a Texas company has a remote camera that senses a high temperature in people walking by. I wonder if they're going to alert SWAT. This would be a bad thing, especially if you're walking your dog. SWAT and the police kill more dogs than COVID kills people.

The US government and tech industry are discussing ways to use smartphone location data (from Faceyspaces, Google, and others) to 'combat' coronavirus. NO. Ok? NO. It's bad enough there is any location data. This serves no purpose and won't go away after coronavirus does.

Bernie said he is going to re-evaluate his campaign. So he's out, leaving Biden.
Biden said he'll have a female vice-president. I suggest Nancy Pelosi - they can run on the Senility ticket. But seriously folks... this is the best they could come up with? Do you seriously want this man as president? Online wags suggest Biden just gave the presidency to Trump.


Today I identify as   toilet paper - I want to feel loved just once.



Dear lefty

• What are you listening to these days?
• The good news: listening to my neighbors have sex
• The bad news: they're in their 90s.

I am torn.
We are advised to stay in, but Guitar Center sent me a 20% off coupon. I'll brave the virus. Ladies - would you do this for 20% off shoes? We know the answer - you would risk the Black Plague for a shoe sale.



SJW STILL!

Coronavirus declared transphobic as surgeries delayed. Life saving surgeries.
It's great to see one organization blazing on with its mission in spite of health considerations.