All's Fair in Love and Nuclear Weapons

No one saw this coming: there's a flaw in the Google smart speaker that will allow it to be hacked. Also SQLite and Chromium-based browsers. 

While we're mentioning a few of my favorites, a Faceyspaces photo API bug exposed photos of 6.8 million users. Developers could have gotten access to the pictures you didn't post (yet), including the ones with the donkey. I lost count of how many FB f-ups there were in the last week.  By all means, keep posting. Enjoy!

Reminder to make backups of all your important information. It's great policy, plus if you get nailed with malware or ransomware, you can restore from your backups. Unlike most of the companies who got hit with it thus far.



This year's Worst Password list is out. 

1. 123456  (2nd year in a row!)
2. password
3. 123456789
4. 12345678
5. 12345
6. 111111
7. 1234567
8. sunshine  (wtf?)
9. qwerty
10. iloveyou
11. princess
12. admin
13. welcome
14. 666666
15. abc123
16. football
17. 123123
18. monkey
19. 654321
20. !@#$%^&*
21. charlie
22. aa123456
23. Donald
24. password1
25. I'm not typing all 50

When you're done picking out one of them, make sure you write it down on a yellow sticky and put it on your monitor, or under your keyboard. This is what we call sarcasm, based upon being in desktop services way too long. Not anymore!

misFortune 500

The largest companies in the world have an average of 500 servers and devices accessible from the Internet - and many leave thousands of systems open to attack. 

It's only a matter of time until the Fortune 500 and government have to buy their own docs on the dark web.

• A Playboy model has been thrown in jail after posing naked at the Vatican. I think this is Fake News. No one would notice a grown woman at the Vatican.

California Uber Faultus

You'd never believe this, but scientists at the University of California, Berkeley, are developing a tool to identify "hate speech" on social media.

In other news, social media scientists are developing a tool to identify "hate speech" detectors.

Speaking of Berkeley, a delivery robot burst into flames at UC Berkeley. It was after hearing about the tool to identify "hate speech".  As if I could make up anything better, students held a candlelight vigil for it. Apparently there was nothing to be outraged about for those few minutes.

Don't go to Berkeley: it's way too silly.

• Man was not meant to write with a mouse. If you don't believe me, open any paint/graphics program and try to produce text with your mouse. No cheating, by which I mean no drinking.

Cruel and Unusual:

A poacher's sentence includes repeated viewings of Bambi.

The Catholic Archdiocese of Detroit said it regrets that a priest at a teen's funeral questioned whether he would get to heaven after killing himself. 

Where do they get these people? At least they admitted it.

By the time Ash Wednesday rolls around, Catholics will have a permanent red spot from hitting themselves in the head when this stuff happens. Much like America, you guys need better people up top.

Dear lefty

• Undercover Officer Fudge Reinhold asks if I'm circumcised.
• How were Phoebe Cates' boobs up close?

THAT explains a lot:

Frequent sex associated with greater enjoyment of life for men.

Oh yeah... but not women.

For women, frequent kissing, petting, fondling, and feeling emotionally close to their partner was associated with higher enjoyment of life.

If you think about it, what women enjoy can lead to what men enjoy: Win-Win!

• I'm no linguist, but the phrase you don't want to hear when you're driving your Tunnel Boring Machine underneath the streets of Dusseldorf, is "Das is not goot."

It's almost a race to see what's going to do us in.
The Department of Defense Inspector General found multiple flaws in missile defense system cybersecurity. There weren't enough 8" floppies to keep them in operation.

I suggest they ask the aliens (the ones in the ships, not the ones trying to enter the country illegally). Ok, maybe not the aliens... whatever flew the ships on 2 different occasions over missile bases and caused all sorts of havoc. Maybe they have something for us on the defensive side.




If I understand this correctly, the Russians messed with social media to elect Trump, specifically targeting African Americans. African Americans are rightfully pissed, and have organized a Log Out of Facebook day. I have requested a meeting with the head of African Americans, Hillary Clinton, to discuss logging out of Facebook permanently.  This would be the second group, after liberal educated whites, who think black people are stupid. I think anybody who votes based upon social media is stupid.

• Bohemian Rhapsody is the number one movie and song in the country.
• Queen continues to tour, with Adam Lambert singing. Somewhere in heaven, Freddie's looking down, seeing Adam, and saying, "Nah - too gay."

A Twitter bug let unauthorized apps get access to DMs (Direct Messages).

These are the private messages exchanged between two or more people. Twitter, like Faceyspaces, is stupid on top of cesspool.

Dear lefty

• Joe Officeworker, of Anybusiness, USA, asks what's wrong with 123456 as a password
• Dear Dummy: Go back to your desk and click on some random links.

Mornings: A Pox on Humanity

The Army has lifted their ban on recruits with mental health issues, like self-harm, bipolar disorder, depression, drug and alcohol abuse. If they're serious about mental health issues, they should recruit paranoid schizophrenics, manics, sociopaths, and psychopaths. They can get the job done.

• While joking with my lesbian friend, I told her I'm so good, she'll wish I was female. She was most amused, but started asking me about my wife. Perhaps she isn't a latent heterosexual after all.

A week after the iPhone X was released, a Vietnamese security company has cracked the face recognition, allowing access to the phone. It involves a mask printed with a 3D printer, some silicone, makeup and two-dimensional images, costing about $150. There still may be a passcode requirement in certain cases, but they got there. Yeah, fingerprint, facial recognition, very secure.

Just for fun, a British supermarket is experimenting with facial recognition at checkout, using a smartphone app. What could possibly go wrong?

• If you're not ready to delete your Faceyspaces account, you can deactivate it. Of course, none of us have a Faceyspaces account, and even if we did, it would already be deleted.

A Russian developer snuck cryptocurrency mining into certain android apps. Although this is not technically illegal, it should have been disclosed. Mining benefits the developer and slow the app down appreciably. While there's no sure way to avoid this, I urge the same cautions you should use for any android app: read the reviews for obvious shills and weird foreign spellings of words and grammar. Don't download foreign apps, even if there are a million downloads already. Stick to known apps. Also, don't install anything by "Oxothuk", who claims he disclosed mining via Terms and Conditions, which should come with a five dollar reward for reading. Install Malwarebytes. Be careful out there.

• Just when you thought it was safe to go back in the air, you might want to avoid the 757 and 737, which are the majority of planes. DHS hired hackers, who managed to get into the planes' control systems. The results are classified. The hacks are not out for anybody to use. They don't affect the 787 or Airbus A350, which have 'cybersecurity built in.'

A passenger was asked to deplane after her emotional support pig became disruptive.  She complied and took a later flight, with her emotional support elephant.

• Another of the Smallest Books Known to Man: Heterosexual Males in the Audience at the Wendy Show.
• Speaking of which, don't forget to avoid any tv show that uses the phrase "baby mama" or has "Dog the Fatty Hunter" in the name.

Don Ritchie saved between 160 and 500 people from suicide in Australia, maintaining a post by a popular spot to leap. "Why don't you come and have a cup of tea?" he'd ask people who were ready to jump off the cliff. An everyday hero.

• As his health is almost puppy-like, Marshall's behavior has gone straight to hell. He has throughly trained his mom to show up when he gives a cue. The cue is either whining, whine/growling, or a sharp bark. It sometimes gets worse when we're eating, which is intolerable. Lately we've taken to ignoring the little loon because when he realizes he's not getting anything, he leaps on the couch or the bed and snoozes. His need for whatever he needs keeps his mom up most of the night. If she makes the mistake of sleeping, he leaps up, whines, and waits for her to make eye contact. This can go on a number of times. I think he knows his dad will not wake up for much of anything.

Yeah, we know I'm a bit behind in my popular culture.
There are many claims of Illuminati involvement in the music industry. If nothing else, it's a shockingly salacious claim for the public, which will suck up whatever it's told. Most of the public is unaware of it but it's gaining popularity and has no shortage of YouTube and other 'proof'. I checked with an industry person, who flatly refused to discuss it with me, backing off like mad.

If you're even newer to the game than me, these huge stars go through mind control to push a large, nefarious agenda. The Manchurian Candidate is not a work of fiction, period. If you have any doubts, look up the MK-ULTRA program, run by our friends in the CIA, with our tax dollars. This morning I read that the Canadian government quietly paid on a claim for a MK-ULTRA survivor (part of the experiments were done in Canada, at the behest of the CIA). The US also paid, after MK-ULTRA was discussed in Congress (with the required missing/destroyed documents).

How does the mind control work? The subject is subject to torture to create alternate personalities (alters) for whatever reason. In Manchurian Candidate, it was for a political purpose. When I say torture, I'm not kidding. You can do the research on YouTube and the net.

Mind control is Multiple Personality Disorder (now Dissociative Identity Disorder). It is 'usually' achieved in childhood, from repeated traumatic sexual abuse, whether sick child molesters or cults. The personality is not really set til about age nine, so it's easier to create in children.

I recently came across this Britney Spears clip.
It's an interview with Diane Sawyer, where Britney behaves strangely, popping out laughing and talking like a child. This is allegedly proof of what's called Monarch programming. I asked my in-house expert, who was wide-eyed, and said there were three alters there.

There are a host of other clips of entertainers and politicians. A lot of what's out there is pure BS, but this deserves further investigation. A clip of Serena Williams comes right out and mentions the names of certain alters, saying she was unaware of one being out, but was told she was at one tournament. Sometimes the host personality (the original) is unaware of the presence of others. Sometimes they are aware. Sometimes they achieve co-consciousness (two are aware at the same time), which I'm guessing is rare in these cases.

You'll also note that sometimes celebrities wig out (Britney's famous hair removal, Katy Perry's breakdown). My guess is that they go back for a tune-up. This is just a guess, but based upon my knowledge of generic DID, a system can crash.

I joke about being a tin foil hat kinda guy, but the evidence is there. Your job is to take a look and come to your own conclusions. Will you wear the Hat or just refer to me as a kook?

a person (and his dog) needs to be comfortable

Chester Bennington - RIP - and Suicide

This is my maudlin, whiny plea after someone kills himself.

Just a short time after the suicide of Chris Cornell, we learn that Chester Bennington (singer - Linkin Park, STP) hung himself.  ThermionicEmissions sends condolences to family, friends, and fans... we're sorry for your loss. Chester was 41 and left behind six children, from two different wives.

My friend in the music industry says it's partially the industry's fault. I'm not sure if I subscribe to the theory but hear it out and draw your own conclusions. He says the artists are allowed and encouraged to go their own way, regardless of possible harm... this makes money for everybody.  The handlers and those around the artist should be aware of self-destructive tendencies, as well as signs of depression, and act accordingly. I agree with this part.

We could all benefit from learning signs and symptoms. Depression is a terrible, painful thing, and it affects many more than you think. Much like with alcohol and drugs, you cannot fix the problem - the person has to be willing. This does not mean you can't be there to listen or maybe urge them toward help just a little.


If you're thinking of hurting or killing yourself...

Stop.
Back it up a second.

Did you know you don't have to feel like this?
A lot of people grow up with this, not knowing it's not normal. They just feel like shit. Eventually they or someone recognizes it and they get some help.

Yeah, help.
If it's an emergency, call the National Suicide Hotline 1-800-273-TALK (8255). Maybe even if it's not. They have people you can talk to who can help you out and direct you to other resources.

If you have family, talk to them. Maybe they can lend a hand - or an ear.
Talk to your friends. One of them might be depressed or know someone who is. There are online support communities. Misery loves company.

Your county/city has a mental health office. If you can't find it, call the county or city main line and ask them. They're there to help you.

It's time to see someone. Someone who sees this all day long, every workday. You are not the only one to feel this way. Through talk and possibly meds, you can feel better.


You may think that everyone's better off without you...

You're wrong.
You're in a lot of pain now and it might be hard to hear but you're wrong.
Do you have family? Friends? A significant other? A pet? Online buddies? Somebody you chat with at the store?

You are going to leave a trail of devastation in your wake.

You might think it's just a little adjustment for them and they'll go on.
You're wrong.
Death isn't one and done: death is forever. It stays with you and you never get over it.

Try something for me, please: pick someone you love. A parent, grandparent, brother, sister, good friend, dog...  they can be living or not. Put just the two of you in a room. Now look them in the eye and tell them you are going to kill yourself. Wait a moment and listen to their answer. You are going to leave a trail of devastation in your wake.  Do you want that?


Yes, Mr. Know-it-All...

My wife suffers from a number of chronic illnesses; among them, bipolar disorder. When she gets depressed, sometimes it doesn't stop there and heads straight for the depths of hell. This resulted in suicide attempts. Through proper medication and therapy, she learned to at least be alert to her feelings. If she starts thinking about hurting herself, she goes to the hospital, where she hangs out until the urge passes and she learns some new coping skills.

Let's talk about devastation.
One day, a long time ago, my wife had to go to the hospital. She awoke in the emergency room, hooked up to all sorts of machines. She was terrified. Then she looked around the room at her best friend and her husband, who didn't know if she was going to make it. They were a wreck. She thought of her family, including a sister who fell and died, and the effects on the family. Right then, she swore there would be no more of this. She was in pain, but never really experienced the effects her actions would have on those around her.

I don't like talking about any of this but maybe it will help someone.
I felt miserable most of my life. It wasn't right. Well into adulthood it finally hit me: I wasn't supposed to feel this way (not very quick on the draw, am I?).  I was diagnosed with depression. It took a while to get the meds right, during which I got pretty low. I could sit in a chair for days, angry or sad or generally miserable, unable to do much of anything that involved getting off the chair. I would never hurt or kill myself.. it's not remotely possible. But at that time, I understood why people killed themselves. Fortunately I don't go there anymore.

Please learn from our experience. Please read it again if you're not convinced. Reach out.. you have absolutely nothing to lose and everything to gain.

Teaching Ravens to Fly Under Water

Continuing the ThermionicEmissions hatred and coverage of selfies, we have an 18 yeard old Florida woman who police said took selfies as she was having sex with her pitbull. Not known was whether the pictures were posted to Faceyspaces or Instagram.

• While we're continuing, here are the top ten passwords from the Ashley Madison hack: 123456, 12345, password, DEFAULT, 123456789, qwerty, 12345678, abc 123, pussy and 1234567. ThermionicEmissions readers know better than to use these kinds of passwords.

Husband bites estranged wife's nose off and eats it after she fails to return his calls. "When I said 'eat me,' what I meant was...."

• Countdown to Popemageddon continues: US sex victims say Church remains obstacle to justice. 
• A pastor committed suicide six days after his name came up in the Ashley Madison hack. 
• Men of God, all of them.

As it turns out, reports of Monty Python Terry Gilliam's death are premature. He has not joined the choir invisible, he is not pushing up daisies, he was not nailed to the perch and no one will have to come home from holiday to a dead Gilliam. For his part, Gilliam apologized for being dead.

• Dereliction of Parenting Department: Irish Dad sues Facebook after eleven year old daughter sent provocative pictures of herself to men and had chats. Ummm... Dad... if your eleven year old daughter behaves like this, Facebook might not be her only issue, eh?

California legislators approve bill allowing doctors to give patients suicide pills. They should give this over to the Pentagon's 'secure' virus labs. Perhaps they'll send them to DC by mistake.

• Both Chrissy Hynde (Pretenders) and Grace Jones have had their say about today's female stars: “They dress up as though they are challenging the status quo, but by now, wearing those clothes, pulling those faces, revealing those tattoos and breasts, singing to those fractured, spastic, melting beats – that is the status quo."  If you told me I'd be quoting Grace and Chrissy, I'd tell you that you were driving the short bus, short a few wheels.

Pentagon computers hacked again - this time it's the Food Court!  Never mind the Office of Personnel Management - this is WAR.

• When they came to tax my salary, I was silent. When they came to tax my drinks, I was silent. When they came to tax my internet, I was silent. Now who is going to speak up for me, now that they have come to tax my porn?  Yes, Alabama, rather than fixing their problems, has levied a massive porn tax.

America gets a D in science: 22% confuse astronomy with astrology. We are a nation of morons. Now ask yourself who this benefits....

• Tired of the endless iDevice hype? This puts it in perspective.

Forty-two percent of registered voters think Hillary Clinton is the presidential candidate most qualified to protect the United States from cyberattacks. Occasionally there is a headline so stupefying that I have no choice but to reproduce it. We not only fail to remember last we - we actively ignore it.  What was I saying about a nation of morons?

• A few weeks back, at work, I was in the men's room, doing what one does in the men's room. Also in the men's room was another fellow, doing what one does in the men's room. He starts singing, which I found weird, as well as being outside of the Accepted Rules of Rest Room Etiquette (ARRREQ). "Oh Sara... Oh Sara... Oh Sara..." he went on. After a few of these, it began to seem that this guy had a problem, ostensibly named Sara. He sounded hurt. I felt sorry for the guy - we've all experienced this. Not so sorry that it wouldn't make it to the blog, of course. Unless I completely forgot.
• Today I was back in the men's room, doing what one does in the men's room, when I heard some dude talking to the loo. No, not talking - singing. "Oh Sara...oh Sara...oh Sara..." he continued, with the familiar tone of sadness.  Along with his singing, I hope he wasn't also practicing his dancing.

Japan's crippled Fukushima nuclear plant Monday began releasing previously contaminated water into the sea. Previously contaminated? Is this some sort of code? New math? Triplespeak? Rest assured that whatever comes out of TEPCO (Japan's nuclear authority) has been marginalized and homogenized to within an inch of its life, much like American politicians. From the initial incident, TEPCO has sought to minimize any impact. Yet here they are, inventing the state 'previously contaminated'. Do you suppose all of the nuclear waste we bury in Yuma, AZ, is previously contaminated? Would you mind it being dumped in the ocean?

• Obamacare enrollees must double to make budget projections work. Ain't socialized medicine grand? I'd love to give you an 'I told you so,' but I'm paying for this just like you.
  

Two Muslim fundamentalist preachers were discussing the question of “whether wives should be beaten or not” when two topless activists jumped onstage. Ummm... if it's feminist to not believe women should be beaten, call me feminist. In yet another case of extreme journalistic bad taste and incompetence, the Telegraph put black bars over the women's breasts. All of the news, guys... censorship will not be tolerated.

TECH

• Malibu Phone Home: Chevy reports to parents on teens' driving habits.  If this car can report on your teen...
• Oops - GM performed a stealth update because of a long-term vulnerability (2010-2014) to OnStar. The only way to truly fix this issue is to completely disable the hardware (it's easy).
• Remember this blog reporting on California optical internet cables being cut about eleven times? Systems of the US Department of Energy were breached more than 150 times between October 2010 and October 2014. I believe this need some serious study. What would happen if either went down? Shades of the east coast US power blackout, allegedly caused by a squirrel. I hope to be mistaken here.

As if Windows 10 isn't enough of a pervasive, spying data sinkhole, Windows is now downloading it to your computer, even if you didn't ask for it. Just in case, you know.

Make with the Music

Superstar is frequently used but not frequently earned. In this case, I'm sure you'll agree that Queen neatly embodies the term. From their humble beginnings to stardom beyond expectations, this incredible band of audio and video experts truly entertained.

Queen could not have been without the outrageous frontman and composer, Freddie Mercury. Born Farouk Balsara, he could certainly command attention. Less publicized is his ability to musically direct the band in the studio. He sometimes came in with complete musical scenarios, which the band ably saw to completion. Freddie's personal life is fairly well known and a biography turned up a great line: Freddie's parties were truly something to behold, but I can't say more without the advise of my attorney.

Brian May, the guitarist who built his own guitar, is responsible for large amounts of Queen's sound, with his wall of amplifiers and multitracked, delayed harmony guitars. Yet somehow he manages to carry the excess off live. Brian is also a doctor of astrophysics, perhaps the doctor with the tallest hair of the title. `39 is a more acoustic song that Brian sings. It deals with the very interesting, and sometimes sad, topic of time travel and time relativity. The chorus harmonies are right out of the Queen playbook.

The spirit of show business shines through on The Show Must Go On. And it must*.

Successes are complex beasts but often have a great sense of humor, not to mention boundless creativity. I Want to Break Free is a good example. I can't say I'm crazy about the song, but the video is absolutely hysterical. I understand it was popular in Britain but didn't translate well Across the Pond. This does not strike me as requiring any translation at all.

One of my favorite Queen tunes, from the Sheer Heart Attack album, is Brighton Rock. Unless you're a rabid fan, you might not know it. As if you didn't know why I like it, the reason might start around 1:50 in. It's a solo symphony.

Freddie and the band will live forever in our ears.

After Freddie's death, Queen toured with the great Paul Rogers singing (an unfortunate mismatch), then Adam Lambert. One day, after viewing Adam, Freddie's ghost was heard to say, "Unh-uh. No way. Too gay."

What is the airspeed velocity of an unladen cocker?

* RELEVANT ANECDOTE: Back in my musical comedy performing days, I had a weekend show in Bumfukt, PA. Hungry, we set out for some local food pre-show. A pizza place was down the street so off we went. I ordered a meatball sandwich because it's harder to screw up, plus gray meatballs were a favorite target of mine.

After the show we went home, as we were wont to do after shows. The next morning, I begged my girlfriend for help in stopping the bed from spinning rapidly, in the opposite direction that the room was spinning. Things got no better from there, at which point we made the difficult diagnosis of gray meatball-induced food poisoning.

As the spinning was getting faster, we called our agent, requesting he put in another act. Ever accommodating, the agent told us there was no other act.  As a result, I had to stand onstage, buffered on each side by a group member. While there was great internal debate about the hilarity of projectile vomiting, I decided against it. Afterwards they packed me in with the gear and took me home. Eventually the room stopped its rapid rotation.

The Show Must Go On.

All the Military News That's Unfit to Print

The Pentagon, in a break with tradition, is to celebrate Gay Pride this year by recognizing gay troops.  Frankly, I'm not buying it.  I suspect this is a less-than-clever attempt to purge the stupid gays from the military.  It would probably go like this:

We would like to recognize Adam Smith, our first gay soldier.  Please stand up!

[PLOOK - Adam is shot]

Next is Melinda Green.  Stand up, Melinda!

[PLOOK - no more Melinda]

Next, John Greenberg.  Please stand up, John.
John?


Remember: It's don't ask, don't tell for a reason.

==========================

A study has just been released, which states that the number two cause of death in the military is suicide.

Presumably the first is admitting you're gay.

The Great Sock Crisis of the 2000's

Today I'd like to revisit an old, important, and painful issue: socks.

As some of my original readers might remember, I have had many issues around socks.  It started innocently enough, when I caught my wife snickering to her friends about throwing out certain socks.  The girls were all snickering along knowingly.  When I listened in, I discovered that my wife was systematically disposing of all my socks with colored stripes around them.

When confronted, she claimed it was only because they were worn out.  This might also explain why the new socks that tended to magically appear now and then had no stripes whatsoever.  You can call them Magic Socks if you like but I was pretty agitated when I discovered this nefarious plot.  And you have never experienced anything like a room full of women knowingly laughing at you (I hope).

Next up was the grief I experienced from my band, all older than me, some by ten years.  I appeared at an outdoor gig with shorts and suffered no end of teasing from my bandmates about my socks.  I checked for stripes but there were none, so I had no idea what was so funny.

This time the issue was height.  Yes, apparently my socks were too high.  After the trauma of the stripes, I couldn't imagine things could get worse, but there I was, with socks that were apparently way too tall.  Now I know for a fact that my socks did not grow: they were the same socks at the same height I had always worn them.  For purposes of identification, the packages say Crew Socks.  They have heels and come midway up the leg.  I refer to them as Regular White Socks, as I'd imagine most of us do.

A quick look around revealed that my bandmates were either wearing nothing or gay socks.  Now before you get your panties in a knot, my wife's best friend, a gay male, refers to socks that don't cover the ankle as gay socks.  My wife, thrower-out of all socks striped, confirms that I'm simply not a gay socks kinda guy.  I'd have to go along with that assessment.

I have to admit this was a bit of a surprise.  There I was, playing the guitar like a man possessed, totally unaware of my apparent Fashion Faux Pas, when the guys, impersonating the Fashion Police, dropped the sock bomb on me.  I was totally unprepared for it.

Fortunately the lead antagonist, the drummer, is also a bit OCD and complained additionally that my socks were not even (pulled up to the same level).  I pushed one all the way down, much to his vocal dismay, and did the rest of the set that way.  This might explain his performance that day.  Imagine... being picked on by a drummer!

Apparently the band was too polite(?) to mention my shorts.  Shorts, much like socks, have always been the same for me.  I managed to ignore the `shorts' that come below your knees, as well as the Multi-Person Pants, into which you can probably fit a small band, not to mention pants that look like you're going to walk out of them at any moment.  I'm opposed to crack in any form.

Our yearly outdoor pig roast is almost upon us and after looking at pics from last year, I have decided to avoid all of the usual hagging and criticism from my Queer Eye bandmates and just not wear shorts, thereby hiding my apparently way-embarrassing socks.  As they're expecting 500 people this year, that comes to 250 people laughing at each sock.

But things haven't all been sunshine in the sock department.  My niece looked on in horror as she patiently tried to explain socks to Old Uncle lefty.  She really tries to look less mortified as she attempts to correct my horrid abuse of clothing (and speaking) etiquette.  After her explanation, I realized that I had taken on the appearance of a Crazy Old Man who doesn't even realize that most of the known universe laughs at his socks (even when he wears them with long pants).  It was a sobering moment.

Unwilling to remain sober for too long, I consulted a coworker who is hip and only ten years my junior.  I thought for sure she would understand socks.  But nooooooooo..... she too recognized gay socks as the only socks.

My nephew apparently loves socks.  No one knows why.  He told my wife that if he ever wins the lottery, he wants enough socks to wear a new pair every day (aim high!).  Oddly enough, Jerry Lewis refuses to wear a pair of socks more than once.

I was feeling terribly old and decrepit (even though I'm in my late forties).  Suicide was contemplated but quickly taken off the table.

The other day I auditioned an additional band.  I liked their selection of music and they spent the entire time verbally assaulting each other.  It was a beautiful thing; just like where I work.  Everything seemed ok until I stopped and looked around.  Every one of them was wearing shorts that came past their knees.  Two of them wore gay socks.  The rest of them wore no socks at all.

I officially give up.

Musical Stuff, Among Other Detritus

ZZ Top's touring!

As is Aerosmith.

Here is a cleaned-up film of a 1959 Fender factory tour.

Animal psychologists (no, really) discover music that pets prefer.
(Marshall likes Jeff Beck and the blues.)  I wonder how Zappa rates across species....

Internet activity 'to be monitored' under new UK laws...

This is ugly.  Once again, the populace willingly trades freedom for security (and gets neither).

US police using phone tracking as routine tool...

England may be a proving ground but the US always drives the point home.  Without oversight or warrants.
They further argue that cell tower data is not private.
Turn off your phones (yes, even while driving).

Ashton Kutcher to play Steve Jobs...

They deserve each other.

REPORT: Fmr. KGB chief commits suicide...

"He shot himself seven times in the head then hid the gun."

Hookers 'cleaned off London's streets' ahead of Olympics...

So much for private enterprise.  Bloody limey elitists.

Dell agrees to buy thin-client company Wyse Technology

You'll get the same Wyse performance with Dell's non-existent sales and service.

Somewhat belated: Will we be ruled by April Fools?

Today's Irony Effect

In Atheism We Believe?

It's ok that you want to marry.  We don't care about his color, hobbies, orientation or job.  Just please don't tell us he's an atheist....

According to a survey, atheists are among the most disliked groups in America.

Actually it's ok - we found out it's not their fault... their brains are different.  Note that the question came from Utah....

Crisis - What Crisis?

Hey, did you know the country's in a financial crisis, the likes of which have never been seen before?  In order to disguise this, our friends in Treasury are dipping into federal pension funds to allow President Giveaway the power to create more debt.

Hear the Sea

We can now listen to the sea floor!  The University of Victoria, in Vancouver, set up listening posts so we can hear what's happening.  But, oops... now the US Navy is not happy.  So everyone reached a happy compromise:  all audio is sent directly to the Navy, censored, then returned to the UofV so people can listen.  This is SOPA without even a chance to give input.


Got that glowing feeling?

Been to Bed Bath and Beyond lately?  Quite a large quantity of tissue boxes were produced with Cobalt-60, which is radioactive.  Standing near on of these little beauties for thirty minutes per day will give you the equivalent of several chest x-rays.

The boxes were made in India and shipped to the US, before going to the stores.  At no point was the radiation detected.  Bravo Big Sister!  Way to protect us yet again.


iSuicide?

What happens when Chinese slave labor threatens to throw itself off buildings if it doesn't get a raise?  They get laid off.  Who says the Chinese can't learn from the US?

Should We Continue Business as Usual?

OBAMA APPOINTS MONSANTO'S VICE PRESIDENT AS SENIOR ADVISOR TO THE COMMISSIONER AT THE FDA

Considering the fact that Monsanto just bought Blackwater, we may soon be the United States of Monsanto (by force?).  Again, it's incestuous.  Look at the appointees and long-term government employees.


Homeland Security Monitoring All Journalists & Social Media Users.  And they'll be saving the data, in case they can get you for something later on.

You got it, folks.  Big Sister will be keeping all of your social media data and it's perfectly legal.


Airport Screeners to Be Monitored for Radiation

Your memory doesn't have to be too good to recall Big Sister saying how the xray machines at airports represented absolutely no threat to the operators or victims forced to walk through them.  The xray machines that were strangely ready to go into all airports as soon as Big Sister mentioned them....


Hundreds Threaten Suicide At Microsoft Supplier Plant In China

Define `extreme cruelty'.  
At first I thought they were being forced to use Windows (I'd threaten suicide too).  No, they were demanding a wage increase.  Foxconn and China may have something to teach us after all....  and it will no doubt show up in your Xbox purchase.


Ron Paul News

CNN’s Ron Paul Reporter Admits Bias: “Worried” About Paul’s Success

You mean they're not fair and balanced, like Fox?

Does the Establishment Media Fear Ron Paul?

Is it mostly rainy in England?


Ron Paul won second place in New Hampshire.  This is his second finish in second place.  Remember that when you hear that he's not electable.  Remember that Paul's positions have been consistent over his time in office; they have not waivered or flip-flopped.  You know exactly where he stands on any issue, regardless of how you feel about it.  Try that with any other establishment politician.

Obama is a grave disappointment but not a shock.  He is simply Bush in a darker shade.  The fact is that Ron Paul does not represent the establishment, like the others.  All of these clowns are establishment pawns, ready to do the bidding of their corporate masters at our expense.   This is why the mainstream media barely mentions his name - they're terrified.  All sorts of groups are terrified and I see that as a good thing.  Voting for anyone else in the false republican/democrat paradigm is a wasted vote.

No one is perfect:  I disagree with Paul on abortion (he's against it).  He's a Conservative Christian.  We make the strangest bedfellows, yet I think he's our only hope.  He will uphold the constitution and he's the only one who will.  Bush and Obama continued the dismantling of our sacred document, right by right, chipping away with the aid of an impotent and corrupt Congress.  Romney is another lapdog who will continue the game.  Newt bends whichever way the wind blows (not to mention his failed Contract with America) and Santorum is religiously addled, among other things.

In Iowa, Paul owned the thirty and under vote.  Independents changed their registration to republican so they could vote for him.  He raises huge amounts of money and has serious internet support, which you will not hear about in the media.


Don't vote for the lesser of evils: vote for our country and our rights.

Don't Steal - The Government Hates Competition

Top Argentine official commits suicide at summit

Hey Congress - why can't we get that kind of commitment in the US?

OK Senator Releases New Report on Wasteful Government Spending in 2011

Read this.  It will make you mad.  Then we'll discuss the black budget.

Local Cops Ready for War With Homeland Security-Funded Military Weapons

You paid for the tank that's going to run you over.


Ron Paul: Consistently Pro-life and Pro-liberty

See - he isn't perfect.


U.S. Asks Journals to Censor Articles on Bird Flu Virus

We don't want the terrorists to steal our ideas!