Condoms in the Workplace

Did you know the web was largely text-only at the beginning? From the command line, you fired up Lynx, a text browser. If there were images in the page, all you saw was [image]. It has been suggested we go back to lynx, if only for reducing the load on our computers. 

In case you're curious, email was handled by programs like elm and pine, also from the command line. No email programs on your computer. No html. No emojis. No wallpaper, no pictures, no viruses.... All monitors were black and white (or green or yellowish). You couldn't see a picture no matter how desperate you were. I would go back to this email in a second, It's still available.


Magecart hackers infect 17,000 sites through misconfigured Amazon S3 buckets.   This is THE CLOUD, people. It's bad enough you don't keep your data in-house, but sending it to THE CLOUD without correctly configuring the highway is pure idiocy. And this is the latest and greatest hack - you just scan for open buckets and hack away.


The City Mayors' Association has voted not to pay any more ransoms when they get infected with ransomware.

That's nice.

The City Mayors' Association hasn't voted on backing up their networks, patching the machines, and training the employees not to click on phishing emails.

This policy will suddenly be recalled. As soon as the next city gets hacked.


Microsoft pushed another Win 10 update, this time including a telemetry file. For those of you not familiar, this is the Designated Spying Section of Win 10. If you turn it off, the spying won't stop entirely.  RECOMMENDATION: use a safe, secure operating system that doesn't spy on you.

•  PRO TIP: if you need some political wisdom, consult Ron Paul, not Ru Paul. Trust me.

Dear lefty

• How do we achieve world peace?
• Boom boom. Just enough boom boom so there's little time to do anything else, but you still want more.
• this offer not valid on any day of the week ending in Y. Priests and Boy Scout leaders not eligible. If you sell counterfeit NFL jerseys, ICE will break down your door and deport you.

Fine Florida Finesse

A Florida woman was arrested after ruining $2,000 worth of ice cream by spitting, picking her nose, and urinating into containers.

This is not some 15 year old looking for net cred (she's well past 30). At least the police are catching these idiots. Next up: sneeze guards on ice cream freezers.

A Palm Beach, Florida, principal has been removed after questioning the factual existence of the Holocaust, to protect Holocaust deniers from having to hear propaganda forced on them.

A Florida woman was charged with a felony after her daughter was filmed licking tongue depressor in a medical center.

• Stevie Wonder told London fans he's getting a kidney transplant in a few months. A donor has been found. Good luck, Stevie. 
• In unrelated news, a Cleveland man scored backstage passes for life to Stevie Wonder concerts, plus an all expenses paid vacation with Stevie.

Why do I love our Hyundai?
Aside from many other reasons, it has held together through an uncountable number of people hitting it. It was happening at least monthly. It was personal. Fortunately the accidents stopped.

Until today, of course.
Wife shops at Costco, which I can't stand due to crowds and incontinent, entitled old people. One of these incompetent grannies backed right into our parked car, then jumped out, screaming, and demanded the police be called (she probably couldn't operate a phone, no less a car). Yes, it's personal.

Costco, you're on notice.
You owe us for every ding caused by these aged oafs. You owe us for grief suffered from the dings and grief suffered because of these antedeluvians clogging up the incredibly wide aisles. They leave their carts in the middle and walk off.  I wonder if they ever find their way back. Old people are a treasure, except your old people. You need to modify your client base or set up special shopping hours for them only (so they can run into each other and scream).

To make the experience complete, Costco didn't have Raisin Bran. What kind of insane asylum is out of Raisin Bran? The last actual insane asylum I visited had Raisin Bran in the kitchen. Just not Costco.



We don't mess with genetic engineering on humans, but we're having a blast with fruits. These exist:

pluot - plum crossed with apricot
apriplu - apricot crossed with plum

This is the same principle as greenish blue and bluish green. Partly sunny and partly cloudy. Slightly pregnant.




The year was 1968. Apollo 8 launched and orbited the Moon. While around the dark side, where communications don't work, astronauts saw a light; one suggesting it looked like a campfire.

In the capsules is a recorder, which takes down all audio. Upon return, the audio was transcribed, then classified, of course. Recently the transcription was declassified, and the discussion about the light was read for the first time.

Apollo 11 saw something similar and managed a photograph. It's pretty convincing. Even NASA's Denial Squad Guy fully admitted they saw it and didn't try to poo-poo it.  The non-NASA Denial Squad tried too, but were debunked.

There is still no answer (available) as to what they saw.




Ever wonder what happens when priests get caught molesting children?
Opus Bono steps in with help, money, shelter, defense.... and they're well-funded.

Everybody deserves legal representation, but these people sicken me.
If there is a hell....




SJW Stuff

A Virginia man was arrested after burning a flag in the parking lot of a Walmart. The sheriff acknowledged the person's right to burn a flag, but arrested him for 'doing it in a public place with the intent of intimidating others.'

That charge is still a speech charge. When does burning a flag count as intimidating others? Having large, threatening-looking men at polling places is intimidation. If this shining example of a sheriff wanted to 'teach him a lesson' he might have considered something around a disturbance on someone else's property. It's Walmart's parking lot, not his. He should have burned the flag on his own property. But we don't want to hurt anyone's feelings, plus the police there don't like flag burners, so they have to lob any charge that might stick.

Beating a Dead Politician

Whenever people see a ufo (unidentified - no idea what it is), out comes the Official Denial Squad; usually Seth Shostak (SETI), James Oberg from NASA, and if it's really big, Michael Shermer, head of Skeptic magazine. Although we have no idea what it was (hence unidentified), they already know what it was and that there was a stupidly normal explanation.

One of my favorite Official Denial Squad excuses as to why other species could not be visiting is that their planet would be so far away, they'd never get here. Call me stupid (you wouldn't be the first) but I'd think any civilization that's been around longer than us has some sort of more advanced drive and/or make use of wormholes (which we know about and have not denied).

I am not putting forth an opinion, rather discussing the need for serious investigation. Auto-Denial is not science or investigation.  The old Project Blue Book standby, swamp gas, no longer works to dismiss a sighting.

Let me remind you about the Phoenix Lights, seen by thousands, if not more. The weak denial claimed it was a flare drop (after the claim there were no military aircraft in the vicinity that day). This was a humongous object that hovered and flew slowly, over the 5th largest city in the US. It happened a few years earlier too. If it's ours, there would be simple denial. If it's not... what kind of panic ensued? These things are tracked by NORAD before they get to the US. Rest assured someone knew they were there, whatever they are.

Stephenville, Texas observed a huge craft and had many people reporting it.  Radar returns were obtained. The item of most import to me was that it flew over the Bush ranch before Stephenville. To say this was a no-fly zone is somewhat obvious. Yet was anything said? No. Were there F-15s scrambled? Not that we know. Do our craft hover? Not that we know of. They're also not a mile long, as was reported in Arizona. We are not going to know about very new military tech, so there's that.  Again, not a conclusion, just an appeal for sense.

By merely typing the above, I called into the universe the following action:

Nasa admits ‘tiny super-intelligent’ aliens may have ALREADY visited Earth – and says some UFO sightings ‘cannot be explained or denied’

Something's up.
Nah, the assertions in the article don't seem groundbreaking. He states that not all ufo sightings can be explained. Even the debunkers admit that a certain small percentage can't be explained. Still, worth a read.

I also called into the universe a science-y program called NASA's Unexplained Files last night. Remember the instances of red rain (not the Peter Gabriel song)? The most recent account is from India. Scientists studied the rain and couldn't determine what it was. Finally an Indian scientist (named Godfrey, I think) discovered it was made up of cells that were alive. Electron microscopy showed the cells to be without DNA, which is part of every living thing on earth. Theories were put forth and disproved until someone remembered there was a small asteroid strike shortly before the rain. Scientist got hold of a piece of asteroid and some red rain from the same field and discovered that the cells most likely hitched a ride inside the asteroid (and were obviously extremely hearty). We may have alien life. The cells reproduced rapidly and were not healthy for humans to touch. Interesting to ponder, no?





President Kennedy spoke at Rice University on September 12, 1962, uttering the famous words, in his famous regional accent, "We choose to go to the moon in this decADE and do the other things..."

History speaks reverently about this speech, yet nobody questions what 'the other things' are. It just sits there, a verbal sore thumb, that everyone prefers to forget they heard. I don't blame them - it was bloody JFK. The man has risen to Saint Status. But this is ThermionicEmissions, so we have no choice....

• "We choose to go to the moon in this decade and do a threesome with my brother..."
• "We choose to mount a trip to the moon in this decade and mount Marilyn Monroe..."
• "We choose to go to the moon in this decade, because you never know when your time's up..."
• "We choose to go to the moon in this decade, even if LBJ somehow becomes president [general laughter]..."

Speaking of which, I might not know what I want to be when I grow up, but I know I want to be known by my initials when I die, like JFK, RFK, and LBJ. Also when I'm alive, to be known with a hip middle name, like Stevie Ray Vaughan, and Jimmie Lee Vaughan. Unfortunately I have to change my name, cuz lefty Marshall von Hendrix has no ring of authenticity to it.

• Walmart is getting set to deploy robot floor-moppers. Perhaps because they can't hire employees bright enough to perform this task at $5.50 per hour. Whether it will dress inappropriately or not hasn't been discussed.
• The unforeseen consequence will be insurance rates rising because of old people running their carts into it.

We all knew it was going to happen but we're still surprised it did: The US Military is genetically engineering new life forms to detect submarines. To quote someone or other, "this is some sick shit". The life forms are a cooperative project between Captain Mengele, the military, and Microsoft, so no matter what happens, the NSA and China will have access to it. It will also be the first life form that must be rebooted every week. As technically libertarian as I am, they crossed a boundary.

• I'm a Beth Hart fan. Even critics are Beth Hart fans. You should be a Beth Hart fan too. I don't want to be the one to bring this up, but the lady has a bit of a vibrato problem, like Chrissie Hynde. Don't let that discourage you - give her a listen. Quality..umm... soulful rock (?)

UNIVERSITY YUCKS

San Diego State University is hosting a 'critical look at whiteness' forum.

Some student assertions:

 The Christian cartoon “VeggieTales” is racist because the villains are vegetables of color. The NFL is racist since most players are black and most coaches and owners are white. White women advance white supremacy when they support President Donald Trump.

Immediately following, there will be a 'critical look at blackness' forum.
Some student assertions:  none.. this is the university. They can't find anyone to say anything. Furthermore, the students will firebomb this gathering.

The Christian cartoon "VeggieTales" is racist because not every character is black. The NFL is racist because most of the money goes to the crackers. Black women advance black supremacy when they support Barack Obama.

Please stop.
This was really entertaining when you started. You're now parodies of yourselves.

Again, history will look back on us quizically, with tears in its eyes.

• If only Klinger knew: 27% of the young are too overweight for the military

The fellow(?) who had a Craigslist ad for no strings sex with a housewife, turned out to be a cross-dresser, recorded the 80(!) trysts, and sold them to adult websites. He was just sentenced to a year above the maximum for the crime.  He is very sorry (he got caught) and has had a lot of time to consider his actions (in jail). He is deeply penitent and will return the money to all the men who thought he was a chick (just kidding, he still has the money).

There's just so much going on here... let's start by saying I've never been with a cross-dresser. No, really. She was just a friend. We never played Hide the Salami - I swear. Given that, wouldn't you figure there might be a difference or two between a woman and a man dressing as a woman? Well, first there's the penis. You never find these on women. Well, butt sex is nice and men are stupid, but.... Then there's the facial hair. Sure, some women have facial hair. But it doesn't look like 5:00 shadow facial hair. You don't get rug burn from a blowjob.

Men love breasts. Everybody loves breasts. This guy would be down by two (at very least). Were there copies of Modern Sperm all over the house? Modern Bride? Sports Illustrated (non model issue)? Was there a huge, red Craftsman tool chest in the kitchen? Tampons? A bathroom stuffed so full of cosmetics that he needed another bathroom? Look around, people!

UPDATE: further investigation (I read the words I didn't read the first time) shows that the sex was oral and the 'johns' wore glasses or other eye covering.
(Still... 5:00 shadow)





VACATION

I'm a bit slow. We know this.
I decided to not pay attention to the Kavanaugh/Supreme Court Circus.
To my surprise, the Circus still went on, as did Life in General.
Hey - this is a real Find! Wonder what will happen if I apply this elsewhere...
Particularly soul-sucking is the nonstop barrage of politics on social media. You'd think it would stop after the elections. You were oh so wrong.
So I took a Social Media Vacation, followed by a Social Media Political Vacation. No one is going to change their political views when you argue with them, nor will they change their religious views. Let's just talk about sex and hobbies, ok?

The world continued, without me watching it or participating. I lost nothing. In fact, I felt better. Might work for you too...

Let the Whining Continue

There was a successful cryptojacking attack on the LA Times.
Why?
Because somebody did not secure their Amazon Cloud setup.

Are you beginning to see commonalities?



The moon will be getting its first mobile telephone network next year. This will be used for high-definition streaming from the surface back to earth, in preparation for the first privately funded moon mission.

Shortly thereafter, there will be live streaming of porn to and from the moon, quickly followed by ministries beaming the bible up to the godless heathens that might be occupying the dead satellite. The joke will be on the ministries, as the side of the moon perpetually in the dark is a monitoring station for the aliens who created us.

The connection will be crystal clear with no dropouts until the first subscriptions are sold, at which point service will go immediately to hell, with the 4G connection dropping to 1G, and only texting possible.

• Apple Cofounder Steve Wozniak (friends call him Mary), admits he was scammed out of $70,000 in bitcoin.
• In unrelated news, the new iPhones have gone up $200 each.

The other day, a black woman wrote on social media about how great it was to be alive to experience the creations of Black geniuses of our time, specifically plays and movies.

This lady must be very young, and obviously has an agenda.

Although I never got the chance to see him firsthand, Jimi Hendrix's music will live on forever. As will Freddie/Albert/BB King, Willie Dixon, John Lee Hooker, Billy Preston, Robert Johnson, and scores of others.

Fortunately, I can say I have lived during Jeff Beck, Jimmy Page, and Eric Clapton, as well as Frank Zappa, Eric Johnson, and Robin Trower. It just never occurred to me to be thankful that I was alive to enjoy these white geniuses of our time.

It would be difficult to do this now, but if you were to ask Jimi, he'd tell you that music was colorless. Musicians are colorless to me. I sure don't refer to Jimi as a great black guitar player. Or Jeff as a great white guitar player. They're pioneers of the guitar, beyond just talented.

Every now and then some tiny part of me called The Inner Hippie pops out.
He wants to know why we can't see art as art. He says that until we do, we will be divided.

Cellbrite, an Israeli company is now a favorite with the US Government, as it can unlock iPhones. Are we surprised? This is our government, completely out of control, under the pretext of National Security. Even worse, it's going to be difficult for iDevice owners to be Smug for any reason other than the price they paid for the device.

• NSA director Mike Rogers says the president hasn't given the NSA the authority to battle Russian interference.  He's right - the NSA would never do anything without authorization or that would violate anyone's privacy.

• About a year after I sounded the alarm over Marshall amplifiers with Bluetooth capabilty, Big Fish<tm> in the security industry are now sounding the alarm. Greater validation would be had if anybody saw my original claim.

No more experienced a politician than Oprah Winfrey said that she'll run for president if God tells her to.  Great, another attempted leader who hears voices. Don't forget - God also spoke directly to George Bush.

• 800 illegal aliens in Northern California avoided capture because the mayor warned them about ICE raids. Perhaps they should deport the mayor too.  Justice Department is seeing if this amounts to obstruction of justice charges.
• I was always told you can't pick and choose which laws you will obey.
• Rest assured that if you or I .....

I have an old laptop. It's very capable still, but needs a new keyboard.  This would be its third keyboard. For some reason, I go through them. I'm not sure why. It would have absolutely nothing to do with pounding it when it doesn't function properly. Last time I made the mistake of buying a keyboard from an unnamed country that makes chips that spy on us. It was very reasonably priced and the writing on the keys wore off in short order. I'm looking at proper keyboards and they're going for ridiculous prices. I'm starting to remember why I went Chinese. One official keyboard from the laptop manufacturer would cost half of what the laptop now sells for used. In related news, one can get a hell of a laptop deal on Ebay, especially if you're familiar with the model. Never hurts to have a spare machine.

As a grizzled IT veteran, I can tell you that you haven't lived until you've had to perform surgery on a laptop. This being the 2000s, there was a YouTube video showing the procedure, as well as sites with instructions.

Currently, the keyboard has no letters on a number of keys, one being I. Just to be amusing, the I key also requires an extra press or two to register. If it weren't for spellcheck, I'd be missing a blog full of I's.  An't that a btch? I must also keep both eyes on the screen at all times, as the keyboard has a habit of highlighting whole paragraphs and deleting them while I type. Spaces don't show up or happen twice, as do Rs. It's like having gremlins in the machine and not knowing when they're going to strike. Yes, I can use an external keyboard but space considerations make it difficult.

And just for fun, sometimes one of these things happens when I'm typing on a different machine.

• California just approved driverless car testing. Until now, the law mandated a backup driver.
• The California Mayors' Association has called for a halt to driverless vehicles, stating that they take jobs away from illegal aliens.
• Besides - what could possibly go wrong?

But I'm Not Dead Yet!

Neurologists studying the brains of nine people as they died discovered that the brain continues to work for minutes after the heart stops beating. The observation concluded that the brain dies with a final wave of activity called "spreading depression". They liken the sensation to living in Philadelphia.

Think about this... when does one die? At what point do they go toward the light and see the Easter Bunny? How much faster is rebooting a brain than Windows? How long has Nancy Pelosi been dead? I have questions...

• If you attend a number of schools in England, it's possible you're on camera, broadcasting live to a website. Why? Bad default security on the webcams, as well as no one concerned about security at the school to change the bad default passwords.
• This illustrates why it's important for everyone to change the default passwords on any device. You wouldn't want your BabyCam to be broadcasting live to some web page accessible to the world. Unless you're an exhibitionist, you also wouldn't want your bedroom security camera to be broadcasting to the internet..

A quantum physics experiment has proven quantum communication is possible with a single particle. If any of us has any clue about quantum physics, this is pretty exciting news, done by superposition, the phenomenon through which particles can effectively occupy two places at once.

Quantum particles can be on, off, or both; proving they're female.

Revenge of the Lions

• a woman was killed by a lion at a South Africa game lodge today.
• Earlier this month a suspected poacher was mauled to death and eaten by a pack of lions close to South Africa's famed Kruger National Park.
• Lions 2 - Humans 10,247

In Chicago, congressional candidate Benjamin Thomas Wolf is featured smoking pot in his campaign ad. He supports legalization of marijuana. His competition supports a needle exchange. He is featured shooting heroin.

• Ryan Seacrest's former personal stylist, Suzie Hardy, alleges sexual aggression; grinding his erect penis against her while clad only in his underwear, groping her vagina, and at one point slapping her buttock so hard that it left a large welt still visible hours later.
• Reached for comment, Seacrest apologized and said that he just wanted to see what it was like to do it to a woman.

The Offended Files

Residents of a nudist community in Florida (where else?) are upset because their mail carrier refuses to deliver mail. The carrier says she is 'offended by their naked lifestyle'. The Postal Service will not force her to go where she's not comfortable. No word on whether they are going to ask someone else to deliver the mail. Several hundred male carriers have volunteered for the job.

• The Catholic church is considering married priests to ease the shortage of clergy. Because orgies and molesting children aren't a serious problem yet.

Hillary Clinton, upset that America is celebrating the 15 month anniversary of her not being president, is warning the person who was elected that "The Russians are still coming."  All over the country, dead horses continue to let out low moans.

• It's not that we're not serious about security, it's just that we don't care. Manufacturers are currently using compromised firmware in implantable devices... you know...  like pacemakers... So if you feel like dancing or clutching your chest, it's not your imagination.
• Remember that minor Equifax hiccup that divulged ridiculous amounts of your personal data? Just announced: 2.4 million more US consumer names and partial drivers licenses stolen. The unrelated news is that the CFPB dropped the investigation and refuses to reopen it.

There's another new tv show. This is never good news. To say it is horrid would be synonymous with new. It's called My Four Wives. No, this does not refer to multiple personalities. It's some dude with four wives, families, and houses.

Why?


Perhaps the second or third question to come to mind is what the hell this guy does to be able to afford four families.... most of us can barely afford one.  Four mortgages... I can't afford my dog.

Now let's get to the crux of the biscuit: four wives.
Four.

Wives.
How many of us can say we mastered the art of one spouse?

Did the fellow simply not get it right the first time and insist on making the same mistake three more times? Does he have some fatal desire for nagging? Was his own personal army not building up quickly enough, so he enlisted three more factories? Wouldn't it be faster to adopt? What does the will look like? He must be fabulously wealthy because he can't possibly have time to work.  What have the psychologists had to say about this horrible need to hurt himself - can't he just cut, like everyone else? If he hasn't had a vasectomy, his wives should make sure he doesn't get within ten feet of them at all times. If he goes to a bar, do the four of them form a human shield around him? Does he sleep with more than one at a time? Do they like girls too? What does he put in their milk - they look fabulously happy. Too happy, in fact.

He obviously didn't do this because he likes supermodels.
Maybe the families are a corporation.. Jason Sperm, LLC. Four Too Many, Inc. The Fertility Group.

You have to figure he's a member of one of those polygamous Mormon sects. I have nothing against Mormons or polygamy; one should be able to choose the instrument of one's own death. You want more than one wife? Go ahead - it's your funeral.

The commercial showed them all flying somewhere.  Never mind four houses... this is how you can tell the guy has too much money: that many plane tickets. Whenever they need to go somewhere, they don't call an airline, they call a tour guide. "I need thirteen for Polygamy Class - it's right before Coach."

• After intense taste-testing, we recommend that if you wish to try Chocolate Lucky Charms, you go with Chocolate Frosted Flakes with Marshmallow Bits.  Trust us on this.

from @RealPeerReview
Here's a classic paper written by a male feminist:

I have heard more plausible stories of little green men from meth addicts.
The author was subsequently stripped of his skirt by actual female feminists.

• A Big Security Dude<tm> found a paper postulating that space aliens could send us malware capable of destroying humanity. In retaliation, we'll send them Windows.

In legal news, Google is being sued by a fired YouTube recruiter for wrongful termination.  Google was unhappy that their workforce was largely white and Asian males, so they tried to 'rectify the situation by working harder to find candidates who could do the job and who are also traditionally underrepresented minorities.'

Per the lawsuit:

In April of 2017, Google’s Technology Staffing Management team was instructed to immediately cancel all Level 3 (0-5 years experience) software engineering interviews with every single applicant who was not either female, Black, or Hispanic and to purge entirely any applications by non-diverse employees from the hiring pipeline. Plaintiff refused to comply with this request.

Despite lacking legal law linguistics, this sounds illegal.
Google vows to defend itself, saying that it has a “clear policy to hire candidates based on their merit, not their identity.."  Unless they're white or Asian males, of course.

How many times do you hear that any job area is populated by Asian males? Numerically, that's odd. On the other hand, hockey is completely free of Asians, while basketball and football are majority African American. Do you suppose the NFL will be sued by a recruiter because he refused to hire more whites or Asians?

My head continues to explode over a topic that's becoming more visible lately: Universal Basic Income. 

A CNBC article explores this topic in greater detail. 

The premise is that the government gives everybody a basic income.

I keep thinking I'm not understanding this correctly and asking Who's gonna pay for this?

I wrote previously on Stockton, California, which has a pilot program, handing out $500 monthly. This doesn't bother me as much, as it's being done on a private grant. But in the future....

Who's gonna pay for this?

Understand that the government has no money. All government money comes from We the People. So when the government is going to provide a basic income, where is the money going to come from? 

A poll shows 48% of Americans support a UBI.

These are obviously the ones who haven't asked Who's gonna pay for this?

A proponent of UBI, speaking at the World Economic Forum had this to say:

"The claim is often made that if you give people a basic income, they'll become lazy and stop doing work," Standing said. "It's an insult to the human condition. Basic incomes tend to increase people's work rather than reduce it."

Apparently this fellow has never heard of welfare.

But wait - it gets better....

"People are saying, 'Look we cannot let inequality continue to grow, because the political consequences could be a disaster'," Standing said, pointing to the recent rise of more authoritarian figures. 

You don't think there's any bias there, do you?

The most popular solution is the federal government sending a monthly check to everyone, regardless of earnings or employment. An estimate of the cost to provide everybody with $10,000 annually is three trillion dollars.  This is more than 3/4 of the entire yearly federal budget. It's allegedly more than the military budget, so there's no worry of it ever coming to pass.

Who's gonna pay for this?

Americans are a sad lot, with 80% saying that companies that benefit from artificial intelligence should pay higher taxes to fund UBI.  They also support changing the name of the country to United Socialists of America.

One reason I vote libertarian is to protect myself from people like this.

To be clear, I support helping people who need help due to disability or short term for job loss. UBI would take everybody's money and give it to... everybody.

Read the article. Your head could explode too!