I do nothing: I do it often and I do it well

For some reason, known only to the Flying Spaghetti Monster, an email address I don't use has become Spam Central, largely for foreigners trying to give me millions of dollars because of their declining health (and mental capabilities). The address is ONLY used for Google communications for this blog. Even though I was never good at math, I think I got this one.

If I really cared, I'd take them up on their offer and scam them out of their own money, but it's just sooooo much effort to expend when I can't become awake for work, even at my own desk, after 3 cups of coffee (and an undisclosed amount of meth, snorted right there, which everybody thinks is coke).

• If you use Firefox and take advantage of private browsing, you will be happy to know that it's absolutely infested with Google nonsense. I'm recommending that, if you care, you set your options to mimic private browsing, without using the feature (forget everything you did, flush cookies and history, etc). 
• One of the problems is the use of a Google blacklist of bad sites. When you query the list, Google knows where you're going. Outside of private browsing, you can set the service used (which may also keep records - check).

Speaking of delayed gratification, Stanford University for the Terminally Wealthy did a famous study, where children were put in a room and given a marshmallow. They were told they could eat it whenever they wanted, but if they waited til the Study Person returned, they'd get another marshmallow. Forty years later, it was shown that the children who waited experienced better outcomes in life. Also that phrases like 'better outcomes' take about forty years to appear. And if you don't pay researchers on time, studies take a lot longer to reach a conclusion.  [from 12 Habits of Mentally Strong People]

• US police might be in trouble via their bodycams. They turned up hackable, which could put the attacker in control of the camera and video. 
• If the police don't forget to turn the camera on.
• We will not learn.

After several huge media outlets threw Alex Jones off, coincidentally at the same time, it was discovered Twitter didn't. This came as quite a shock to Twitter's Left, which demanded he be silenced for 'hate speech', as well as free speech advocates, who figured he'd be thrown off by now. Reports are that Jones' subscriptions went through the roof after 'disappearing'. Twitter's Left are apoplectic, demanding they Do Something. Twitter is having trouble making a decision, for once. It should be noted that the majority of people thrown off Twitter are Twitter Right, as admitted by Jack, Twitter's Big Cheese<tm>.

Now, let's think on this for a second. As the election heats up, a conspiracy guy, off to the right, gets thrown off most major media/social sites at once. One could theorize he's influential, as so many sites acted at once. And since several sites acted at once, who's giving the orders?

Disclaimers: I do not listen to Jones, but he amuses me. As a libertarian, I believe that these sites have a right to allow or disallow whoever they want. However, this smells orchestrated and deserves investigating.

The effect of these actions is silencing people and cutting off income. Regardless of the person or entity being censored, is it ok with you that major outlets essentially dictate what you can see/hear/read?  Again, this is not about a person so much as silencing in general. Make no mistake - to allow this is a mistake. The left's excuse is 'hate speech'. If these people understood the First Amendment, they'd know that there is no such thing as hate speech. Speech is speech, whether or not you agree with it. This includes the unscrupulous legislators who allow such assaults on freedoms guaranteed to everyone.

• As if it wasn't bad enough that companies are selling literal airbrushes to apply makeup, they are also selling spray-on hair and/or root touchup. 
• dent puller would be helpful, as would body putty.

After watching way too many police shows, covering the US and UK, I've come to the conclusion, after taking way too much time, that police have turned into a multi-billion dollar drug-seeking operation. I think we can all agree that anything showing the officers in a bad light gets scrubbed from video and never shown. This leads to video of police actions that they think are legitimate.

The script is always the same:

• sometimes lame excuse for pulling someone over
• I need to pat you down
• do you mind if we search your vehicle? If you have nothing to hide, why object?
• ooh - drugs!

Some of the excuses are legitimate, like running a light. Some are completely ridiculous, like not using your turn signal for two seconds before changing lanes. Or a bulb out on your plate. I got pulled over for swerving a little as I approached a toll booth. I fully admit swerving, as I was reaching into my pocket for my wallet. We were on our way to a gig and the guy was playing "you don't have anything in the car I need to know about?". Officer, if you want to pull all our equipment out of the car and check it, be my guest. Then we invited him to the show, because we're that way, plus it was a lovely passive aggressive move on my part.

In all of these cases, the police were looking for drugs.

Now think about this. The US and UK (and whatever other countries) have set up a humongous infrastructure for the War on Drugs. The police are a detection unit for this alleged war. They don't even issue a ticket for a moving violation by itself without looking for drugs. Most of the time, they find drugs. One can guess these segments were left in on purpose because it makes great television, and the non-drug pullovers aren't shown because they're not exciting. Or most of the pullovers are for drugs. Take your pick.

The moral aspect of this is hysterical. "No, son, I don't smoke that stuff and you shouldn't either." Yeah, the forty year old policeman hasn't smoked a doobie and gives a stern moral lecture. Just say no to cutting off our money supply for this terrible war we must fight.

And then there are the just plain stupid drivers, who lead the police on a dangerous, high speed chase through two counties because they have an overdue parking ticket. The driver admits this to the cops, as he's being extracted from his upside down vehicle that he crashed on the side of the highway, after the stop sticks were deployed. No doubt they search what's left of the vehicle for drugs.

DISCLAIMER: none of the above applies if the driver is impaired. The police and prosecutors should throw the book at anyone who drives impaired for any reason.

• Ever so slightly disconcerting is watching my cursor move a little bit by itself.

The Continuing Adventures of Space Force

Lieutenant lefty here.

As you may remember, I was selected for The Force by President Trump himself. A year later, we still don't know why.

I have risen in rank rapidly, because of things like getting three r-words into small sentences, seemingly effortlessly. The fact that I can tell the difference between a male and female cable end might also have something to do with it.

Last week our Secret Mission (sssshhhhh.... don't tell anybody) was to check out what King Kong Ill, President for Life of North Korea, was up to when not in the press. What I'm going to tell you is Triple Top Secret, above even Double Tomato Clearance, so you must swear on whatever it is that people swear on, that you will not repeat this information or tell anyone where you read it. When not in the public eye, King Kong Ill has his BFF, Dennis Rod Man, over for one of his Ultra Secret crossdressing parties. The Minister of Panty Propaganda had a little chat with Rod Man, wherein he explained that no matter how Dennis dressed, the most fabulous and prettiest in the party had to always be the Ill, as insiders call him. An outsider called him the Ill once, and they still haven't found his body.

When President Trump met King Kong, he couldn't understand why the Ill had a picture of J. Edgar Hoover, nefarious head of the FBI and famous gay crossdresser, in his private suite. There are still high level discussions among the Cabinet whether it was a full size picture or just another of the Ill's mirrors.

After this amazing discovery, we saw a bunch of various colored and shaped craft of some sort whiz by our ship. Since we're the Space Force, we thought maybe we should take some sort of action. Since we're the Space Force, we had no idea what action to take, so we phoned the White House. Dick Cheney said we saw nothing; it was merely space gas. So we went back to our duties. By the way, if anybody knows what our duties are, could you please send them to me at my secret classified email address?  Thank you.

Happy Hendrix Holiday

Every day is a Hendrix day but November 27 is Jimi's birthday.  Many Happys, Jimi.

• San Francisco's Municipal Railway system was hit by a ransomware attack. This allowed the passengers to ride free, as the ticket system was down. Insert joke about malware not always being bad. The hackers demanded $73,000. The Railway folks vow not to pay ransom. From my reading, they might want to tighten up the system in one or 1,000 places.
• Just in - in a Monty Python-esque bit of news, the hacker was hacked. Yes, the fine gentleman responsible for the Muni ransomware hack had his email address hacked by a security researcher. How? He guessed the security question, allowing him to reset the password on the email account. Let that be a lesson to you, whatever that means. Oh yeah, strong account security, on everything including throwaway email accounts.

2016 hasn't been too good a year, what with the election nonsense, musicians and others dying, and over 900 recorded security breaches. And those are the recorded ones. Not counted are the hushed and the as-yet-undiscovered ones. There are two types of businesses: the types who have been hacked and the types that don't know they've been hacked. Read the link or just take my word for it. Pass the tissues, please.

• if you have any sort of iCloud account and are receiving calendar or sharing spam, do not reply or decline. If you do, the account will be flagged as live and you'll get more spam. 

Over in the UK, vegetarians and vegans have discovered that the five pound notes are made with a substance derived from animal fat. My singular (identified) vegan reader is going to be glad they fled the UK. How do I know I have a vegan reader? These Google blogger controls are very sophisticated.

• Russia is a funny place. A holocaust-themed ice dance is drawing condemnation. Hmm... ice... probably not Springtime for Hitler then... Hitler on Ice? That's Not my Nazi? Six Million Jews Can't be Wrong?

A giant shield built to cover the damaged nuclear reactor in Chernobyl has been moved into place.  In other news, the Kremlin has announced that Lenin's death certificate has been filed.

• If you're thinking about a night out in Brussels, be aware of a Dancing Tax. Yes, a tax on dancing. And by all means, do NOT go to the bathroom.

Are you, by chance, a Canadian who was caught drunk driving? Those wacky Canuck lawmakers have a punishment for you.. worse than death.. you may be forced to listen to Nickelback. I thought this was against the Geneva Convention but what do I know...

• Who's got time to watch the 37 Harry Potter films? Watch this shortcut instead.

Today's Helpful Tip: How to stop feeling guilty about everything.

* Shoot yourself.

Next week: World Peace

If you're looking for somewhat less deadly suggestions, although I can't imagine why, try here.

• Equality strikes again! Congress, bastion of rationality, has taken women being required to sign up for the draft off the table. Oddly enough, no feminists demanding equality has complained about this. Equality means equality in everything. Or rather, equality when it suits them.
• Having said that, I don't think men should register either.

If you use Firefox through Tor, turn off javascript (like we do anyway) or use another browser until a patch is released. This is for Windows only. Try using the NoScript addin.

• The New York Times asks the question: Can tv be fair to Muslims? ThermionicEmissions answers: not til long after they're fair to the left-handed.

The FDA has agreed to Ecstasy trials for PTSD patients. It's an exciting time for those with PTSD. And before you ask, you can't just go out and get some PTSD. You can sign up to serve in Afghanistan but I don't recommend it.

• An Australian man handed over a breast implant to police, thinking it was evidence of a crime. The 'evidence' was revealed to be a jellyfish. Australian breast implant manufacturers call foul and demand jellyfish alter their appearance to look less like implants.

Hillary Clinton presented a humanitarian award to Katy Perry the other night. Dubbed 'The Axis of Incompetence Tour,' no one can figure out why. A failed politician known for corruption and lying, presenting an award to a singer known for her breasts.

• President-elect Donald 'Me' Trump has announced he is cutting ties with his businesses to focus on running the country, leaving them to his children. Ivanka is excited, hoping for a salary rivaling Chelsea Clinton's.

To no one's surprise, Marshall the cocker is running the house, to an unprecedented degree. He used to bark to go outside. Now he makes a pitiful whining noise. Having discovered whining works, he is now doing a full scale study on Human Behavioral Patterns and whining most of the time, just to see how many times he can make the humans do things until they start refusing. By 9:15am, he has gotten fed twice, been served cold bottled water, and gone outside four times. He counts the experiment as a success and it will be peer-reviewed and written up in Dog Psychology magazine. The humans, out of their minds from constantly being bossed around by a quadruped, are looking into a doggie door, which will not work, due to other quadrupeds possibly using it.

You Are What You Is

A sword-weilding attacker killed a teacher and a student at a Swedish school.  I think it's long past time that we sit down and draft some common-sense legislation to handle the proliferation and illegal use of swords.

• Only in Oklahoma? A drunken lady fell out of her pickup truck while driving. As if that were not enough, her three-year-old took the wheel and steered the truck across four lanes to safety, with his brother in the back.  Mom has been arrested for DUI and child endangerment, son cited for not using horn, brights and middle finger while driving.

There's apparently a Meat Thing happening now. Processed meat (ham, bacon) are about to be linked to cancer and red meat is on their tail. In related news, human DNA has been found in hot dogs, as well as meat DNA in vegetarian hot dogs.So get out there and eat your meat before it's carcinogenic. But maybe not.. it depends on reading the article and understanding that one percent does not mean cancer.

As if that weren't bad enough, now they're coming for our SUGAR!  Rest assured, they will not be able to pry the sugar from my cold, dead hands.

• Once again, Satanists come to the rescue. A Florida man has requested to give a satanic invocation at a County Commission meeting. The commission chairman has stated that this will not happen on his watch. Yes, only Christian invocations will be accepted in that commission. This flouts a Supreme Court ruling that they must make a reasonable effort to accommodate all community members, regardless of faith.  UPDATE: The county has denied the request. A civil rights group is representing the requester.
• The Supreme Court is wrong on this ruling. Yes, a (less than) humble blogger, with absolutely zero legal or Constitutional experience is stating that the highest legal authority in the land (no, not the president) is incorrect. The First Amendment protects speech and forbids establishment of religion. Establishment is when the State or a State facility pushes or leads a particular religion. This is why we don't have prayer in public schools: public schools are run by the State, therefore cannot establish (push or lead) religion. Private schools can do whatever they want - they are not an arm of the State. A county commission is purely governmental, therefore an opening prayer is clearly establishment. This is why the Court is wrong. Their solution, makiung an effort to accommodate all community members, is merely a band-aid over the issue.
• I have long stated that prayer in any state-run entity will cease immediately when a satanic prayer is requested. People would rather stop praying than recite a satanic prayer. Rest assured, this situation is not over, like the public schools in the south where they still read the bible in the morning.

Work has been steady in tasks as well as mood lately. In other words, it's been quiet. The other day I went to the rest facilities and heard a booming voice filling the room, like a drunk, uninvited guest, convinced of his own singing prowess. I figured maybe two stalls were communicating; a clear breach of  Bathroom Etiquette<tm>. But there was only one stall door closed - either the dude was talking to the Voices or had a cell phone with him (hopefully the latter). Just in case the person on the other end of the line didn't know where the dude was talking from, I flushed the toilet first, right before he told the other party that he'd have get back to them. Because that's the kind of guy I am.

• Best headline of the week: "Hillary Clinton showed us a glimpse of her soul at Benghazi hearings. It was chilling." 
• Ok, maybe there's a better one:  "Suicidal people are locked into coffins in bizarre 'death experience' schools in South Korea where 40 people kill themselves every day." Because distraught, depressed, possibly claustrophobic people are going to learn something by being locked in a coffin. They're going to learn that they don't like being locked in a coffin. If there are no weapons in the coffin, they're going to get out, then kill themselves.

Who says science isn't valuable?  "Monkeys with smaller testicles roar loudest." Remember this when you're passed by an impatient driver in a large, expensive car.

• Indonesia has enacted a law punishing homosexuality with caning. "I'm just here for the caning."

Local rabble in Papua New Guinea are massing and burning women accused of being witches. Perhaps they can get jobs on Florida County Commissions.

• It was bad enough when clothing manufacturers introduced 'vanity sizing', where a size 32 waist might be up to a 38 in reality. Go shopping for jeans - I dare you.  Amazon has Levis in slim fit, original fit, regular fit, relaxed fit, straight, relaxed straight, slim straight, loose straight-leg, athletic straight-fit, slim bootcut, regular tapered, original shrink to fit, skinny, comfort fit, slim fit line 8, slim fit hybrid, straight motion stretch and straight welder. This is just the men's jeans!

Ben Carson is a 7th Day Adventist minister, which frightens me. Remember that freedom of religion is freedom from religion. I'm not saying he will do anything odd, but the possibility is there. He mentions God a lot and refers to his tax plan as tithing.

• Chris Christie (R-Hell) was asked to leave an Amtrak Quiet Car because he was bellowing into a cell phone, oblivious to other passengers.  See - if they let him take the helicopter, this wouldn't be a problem.

REVENGE OF THE CARS:  DOVER, Del.- "Dover police say a suspected drunk driver is facing multiple charges after the car he was driving struck and injured seven people...", "The car hit seven people..", "allowing for the car to continue until hit hit another tree. Investigators said Ligon was found to be under the influence of alcohol..."  Are these two separate incidents? I can tell you with one hundred percent certainty that the car did not strike people, did not injure people and did not hit a tree. The drunken scumbag behind the wheel did it. The car, contrary to the reporter's claim, has no free will, therefore cannot make these decisions. The police will tell you that the driver must be in control of his vehicle at all times. How about a drunk driver plowed into a crowd and injured seven people?

• Further proof that we're all aging rapidly: David Bowie will release a new album on 1/8/2016, his 69th birthday.  Hmmm.. David Bowie.... 69....

Speaking of polecats, a study showed that women only make up seven percent of directors out of 250 films. And heterosexuals only make up ten percent [I made that up] - so what? I didn't realize that there was a gender check at the box office.

• Flying Spaghetti Monster News: If you want to show your faith with a pirate hat or a colander on your drivers license, the UK will now allow it. I'm still shopping for a colander with the appropriate gravitas for my license. What this actually means is that there will soon be a lawsuit in PA over religious freedom.

Check out Duracell's new Quantum batteries - they last a long time. Warning: they don't power your device when you're not observing them.

• Millenials are not pursuing cybersecurity careers, especially women.  Yeah, who wants to take a selfie in front of the same servers every day?

People are getting fed up with the gender stereotyping in halloween costumes. Now little girls are donning Iron Man and Spider Man costumes. Accordingly, some of the retail outlets are not using GIRLS and BOYS signs. Presumably, boys are now free to wear princess costumes. Coincidentally, they are also free to return home black and blue, from the beating delivered by their friends (and random strangers).  I think they should go big and wear a Caitlyn Jenner costume - arguably the best of both worlds.

• Defense Secretary Ash Carter says that the US is to begin 'direct action on the ground' in Syria and Iraq. NO BOOTS ON THE GROUND, OBAMA. Are you pathologically incapable of telling the truth? Oh, and that soldier who died? Turns out his boots were on the ground too, Carter. All of you need to take your dishonor out of DC and go make millions in the private sector.. start now, please.

TECH

This is a great article on a great website - "5 mistakes to avoid when buying your next MicroSD card". Did you know there are a number of different SD cards and all aren't created equal? 

MUSICAL EXPLOITS AND CAUSTIC COMMENTARY


I (believe I) have previously ranted about the drivel coming out of radio speakers, specifically whatever Bruno Mars song features the extremely pithy utterance "Eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh....ooh!" after every line. Today some loud alleged food truck decided to entertain everyone within a two block radius with some external speakers. I was treated to an old song I vaguely remember, featuring the almost-as-pithy chorus, "Bad girl, bad girl, you're such a naughty bad girl, BEEP BEEP, TOOT TOOT." It is beyond my musical analytical capabilities to properly dissect these wonders of musical magnificence other than to say the alleged singers should be dissected, which would no doubt produce a more musically-pleasing output.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

How about that Neal Schon? No?  He's the guitar player from Journey.

A song that actually made it to MTV is No More Lies, with Jan Hammer. Neal sings and the song is guitar-based. You'll see Jan Hammer playing a keyboard attached to him with a guitar strap. He's an Austrian dude who is a killer keyboardist and even plays drums (I believe he played them on this song). He is an amazing keyboardist but not entirely a pounder on the drums. His playing is more accents, like one might expect from a keyboardist who wrote the song. Another less accentive keyboardist/drummer is Stevie Wonder (no, really, he played drums on some of his biggest hits).

Neal did two albums with the Jan Hammer (Miami Vice, Mahavishnu Orchestra, solo, Jeff Beck), the first of which is called Untold Passion. This is an aptly-named song and an old favorite. It's a perfect example of dynamics, where it starts out with a sparse theme and builds over time to a blazing lead section and finale. Neal and Jan play their asses off. This is incredibly listening for me - passion and execution.

I'm not going to bother with Journey songs because we all know them. He did some incindiery guitar work there. Neal also joined Santana when he was nineteen. THAT is a pedigree.

A man of many moods, Neal has recorded a number of mostly instrumental songs, including I'll Be Waiting. I'm not crazy about his most recent release, as it seems to consist of lighter rock tunes performed instrumentally. Sure, his playing is lyrical, but I don't need to hear some of those songs (My Heart Goes On?) ever again. Completely irrelevant is the fact that the last time I saw him, he had gotten some sort of plastic surgery. It just seemed weird. I'm ugly and I don't cover the gray (although I lament it) and couldn't afford surgery if I wanted it. Fortunately my wife is so impaired, she thinks I'm good-looking.

Here's a little solo during a Journey tour.

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