For some reason, I have been seeing a lot of royal British types in the news lately, perhaps because of that poor girl's impending wedding to Son of Jug-Ears. I didn't realize it until recently but those wacky Brits enjoy their extremely silly hats, leaving me to inquire as to whether or not there's a Ministry of Silly Hats in the UK.
OBLIGATORY DISCLAIMER: I understand that the Brits are absolutely nuts over their royals and Bob's Your Uncle to them. I support them every bit as much as I support the right of the French to surrender at a moment's notice.
I just start questioning things when the wacky Americans become befuddled by the royals.
CONSPIRACY THEORY: After a closer look at Kate, I have been led to wonder if she's actually a citizen of England. Just between us, she's a bit too attractive to be British. And those teeth...
Let's face it: we Colonists don't have royals (not counting President and Mrs Giveaway, George Bush, and Simon Cowell). It's ok when it's an obsession on the other side of the pond; it's just plain weird when the American Great Unwashed get involved.
Perhaps there's a break in Americans Idle. Maybe Dancing with the Stars has gone on hiatus. Is Glee done for the season? Who knows?
BUT THOSE HATS...
Still, we have the matter of those hats. Some seem to defy gravity. It's apparent that there is no requirement for them to be level (or even close). Some block out the sun, although this isn't fair, as England doesn't have sun (kinda like Philadelphia).
People features an article on Kate's top ten hats. My favorite is the purple one that she appears to be wearing on her forehead. But don't miss the one that looks like a cymbal from a heavy metal drum set.
These are particularly fuzzy. After that, some refuse to obey laws of physics.
Oh no - look: we're not immune either!
Small wonder the Brits look down on us.