It's been a rough time in the old state..... first an earthquake, then an eclipse.
All brought to you by the letter E.
I was nonplussed by both, although it's always weird to have an earthquake here because by the time you figure out it was an earthquake, it's already over. It's not like we get many of them. It was a 4.8, which means the Planet of California is laughing at us. I had an earthquake at work, many years ago. I had the good fortune to be on the potty at the time. It started shaking and moving toward the wall and back for a while. I figured that one out pretty quickly after dispatching the idea that the lunatics that ran that place put in vibrating commodes, or made an amusement park ride out of the bathroom. I must have been beta testing it because I had no tickets.
I saw the eclipse without glasses. Wife said blindness would only improve my outlook.
Little did she know I watched on tv. People got really excited. I didn't. All we got was brown skies, like there was going to be a tornado or something. If we want crappy weather, we don't need an eclipse - our weather is mostly crappy.
Mrs. lefty's body parts are not cooperating, meaning she's recuperating in bed all day. This means the dog is also in the bed all day. It also means I get stuck with the shopping. I suppose I should be happy I don't have to go to CostCo. But I'm not. In fact I'm not happy in general, especially when it involves doing stuff.
I knew it was going to be worse than I thought when I hit the inside glass doors and a guy on a motorized cart was completely in the way of the open doors. Why? He was rubbing down the cart, perhaps for germs. Completely blocking the entrance. Maybe he was protecting himself from snakes by using snake repellent. Perhaps he needed to block the entire entrance because that helped him with his voodoo, although I didn't see any dead chickens. Or snakes.
Soda was on sale. If you buy 2, the price is only twice what it was before the Flying AIDS. Wife laughs at me... actually she laughs at me a lot... because I don't know what things cost. This is part of a plot on my part. If I keep expressing surprise and anger, she'll leave me at home. See the magic here?
There. Was. No. Dog. Food.
Well, actually there was an entire aisle of dog food; just not our brand.
Because she's a tuna-seeking missile, we get her seafood-flavor food. The store had any flavor I wanted, so long as it was chicken and rice. In addition to seafood being her favorite, I used the price as a Flying AIDS price control: it started at $14 and went over $20 the last time they had it.
At least they had English Toffee Oreos. They're like crack (but more expensive). Nabisco will put absolutely anything in Oreos; dark chocolate, mega-stuff, oregano, etc.
Speaking of prices, by the time I checked out, it was more than the mortgage payment. In order to get the discount, I had to put in a phone number (that I haven't had for 20 years). I can remember that but don't ask me to finish a sentence with the correct word.... "That's a really nice.... dammit.... elephant? No. Parade? No. Parking job - that's it." I asked the doctors about this and they put my mind at ease. They said I didn't have dementia or diseases.... it's normal for aging persons. Yeah, I'm really at ease now. They said forgetting where your car keys are is normal. Forgetting what they do isn't.
Privacy is ‘virtually impossible’ on iPhones, experts warn
Just another reason (of many) not to use Apple devices. Do not compute with fruit.
No comments:
Post a Comment