Monday, August 1, 2016

The Light That Shines Only on Hillary is Gone

Thankfully for Philadelphia and the US, the DNC has packed up and left. Now Philly can go back to its normal gridlock and infighting.

  • Pope Francis fell over the other day at a function and required help to get up. The staff here at ThermionicEmissions hopes he's in good health. We're also thankful that when he fell, he did not land on a little boy.

John Hinckley, the man who tried to assassinate Ronald Reagan, will be released from the Happy Place<tm> to his mother's custody. It is rumored that if anyone says, "Polka Dot Dress" to him, his face goes blank and he tries to kill Donald Trump.

  • A new debate asks what's the right age for a child to get a smart phone. My informed answer is 53.

A 17-year-old says he is "overwhelmed" after Celine Dion shared a video of him performing one of her hits. The audience, however, stared in mute horror.

  • There are an awful lot of people claiming Donald Trump is a racist. Think about it for a second.. this is a guy whose primary interests are himself and his money. I don't think he has time to be racist.

Got an android phone with MS Swiftkey keyboard? There was a slight glitch the other day, where autocomplete was providing suggestions of things never typed or in different languages. Oops. There was a problem for people using The Cloud to back up their settings so they could be shared across devices. Swiftkey turned off cloud replication and email prediction. If you have an iDevice, you're only affected if you opted in to The Cloud.  
     1. Don't use MS anything.
     2. Don't use The Cloud.

And while we're at it, if you have an iDevice and use WhatsApp, your messages are not being deleted securely. This is a problem, as 'professionals' with forensic software can read the messages. Of course, if we're using WhatsApp for secure communication, we have other problems.  Copies of the database are stored on your device and.... wait for it... in The Cloud.

  • An Australian sex survey names 33 different genders. How many did you think there were?

This election is historic for many reasons:
1. people are PISSED, resulting in a wildly non-standard candidate with no experience, whose every utterance is fodder for amusement
2. the other major candidate is a proven liar and criminal
3. 2nd party candidates are viable for the first time
4. a newspaper published provocative pictures of a potential first lady
5. a group has emails purporting to result in removal of a major candidate
6. the husband of one candidate was impeached and will nail anything that can't run fast enough
7. the press is concentrated on Minor Bullshit, further Dividing and Conquering

No one could have predicted this. Hold on for a wild ride.

  • My wife's phone picked a really bad time to stop sniffing glue. By this I mean she can no longer plug the charger into the phone. HINT: do not force cords into holes. This advice is important for phones, guitars, and, of course, sex.
  • With 2% battery left, she picked a bad time to start thinking about backup and restoring data. Fortunately the very aware person at her phone store suggested wireless charging, which worked perfectly. There's also a program to transfer all data from one phone to another wirelessly.  This works flawlessly, except at Ft Knox here, where I have the network so locked down, it requires an Act of Congress to add a phone.
  • The most interesting thing learned from this experience,per Mrs lefty, is the sheer bliss that comes from silence. No phone ringing, no constant BLEEPs from notices and email, no one can get in touch. This is technically known as Phone/Email Vacation and might be a consideration when you're stressed.

So it must have been boring for a while.
My mother in law went to a foot doctor for a painful toe. He gave her meds and sent her on her way. The next day she was in the hospital, septic (blood infection) and getting a toe amputated and now in Rehabilitation.

Father in law, who has been dutifully visting his wife daily, goes for a routine checkup, leading to a more specific test. He has a 'minor blockage', which, of course, means he will require a triple bypass. Now. Do not pass Go and do not collect $500 because that's probably his deductible for heart surgery.

The family is leaping into action in an admirable way.
And I'm going to spend some time here and there being a bachelor, along with my co-bachelor, Marshall. This will require cooking, shopping, and Generally Laying About (aboot for my Canadian reader). Fortunately we're both quite accomplished at Laying About.

Got any weird friends? The next time you communicate with them, via smoke signals, morse code, or even email, tell them about ThermionicEmissions. We're the blogosphere's dirty little secret. At our previous location, I made a few pennies from advertising revenue. I make nothing here but the satisfaction of (hopefully) entertaining readers. Please help me gratifiy my ego with a few more readers. Thanks!

Not enough attention is paid to 15th party candidates. Don't forget Vermin Supreme .

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