Boris Johnson (R-Blighty) asked the Queen to make a speech and shut down Parliament for a while, to keep Brexit plans in-place. Johnson says this has nothing to do with Brexit; there is important legislation to work on - more laws to hold up, more fighting to do, and more pressure on Parliament to have ridiculous haircuts (and new, taller hats). Asked for comment, the Queen said, "Huh? Are you talking to us?"
Scotland's representative said this is the action of a despot. She said a few other things, but nobody could understand them.
Critics have said this is a Constitutional Outrage, Absolutely Wrong, We Cannot Have This Sort of Thing, and some of them went so fas as to be Highly Miffed. They said
Things are so similar between the UK and US, when a member of Parliament is sick, they call Nancy Pelosi to have her send over a congressman.
Life is sweet, you get cancer and die.
RIP Eddie Money (Eddie Mahoney- 70). Guy gets a horrid reality show, revives his career, then finds out he has stage 4 esophageal cancer. He passed peacefully. Condolences to his family.
- It's not that I've been married for a long time, but when I see an attractive lady, I say, "Boy, could I make her life miserable."
Dear lefty
- Why are you so crusty all the time?
- Why do you ask me questions all the time?
10 best sites to download free ebooks.
- Be prepared - September is National Preparedness Month.
- In the Old Days<tm>, schools had nuclear bomb drills, then fire drills. Now it's cybersecurity drills. During the exercise, they simulate Faceyspaces being down. That stopped after the first time, when students passed out and developed PTSD. Parents sued school districts for cruelty. Faceyspaces also sued, but you're not allowed to see the paperwork because they believe in privacy.
- Dairy Queen has confirmed that their burgers are not made with human meat. That's outrageous - who goes to Dairy Queen for burgers?
I love my coworkers.
One just texted me.
Her: Hi.
Me: I'm not here today. Hi.
--> 2 minutes of total silence
Her: really?
Me: I can't say. Need to know only.
--> more silence
Her: haha. Anyway, I have an issue.
Me: see a specialist.
Her: ha ha, can you help me or do it for me?
Me: No.
Her: lol
2 hours later....
Her: now that you've done the work and emailed it to me, how do I save the file you emailed?
Me: Call Microsoft and ask to speak to an Outlook Specialist.
1 hour later
Her: can I show you my screen?
Me: why?
Her: well this is what I get.
Me: yes, I know. You told me and I sent you the file.
Her: but I need you to send me the file.
Me: I already sent you the file.
Her: Oh, I didn't see it.
Me: [remembering] They already warned me about killing coworkers.
I love my coworkers.
I suspect another one of them uses their 8 hours to work a second job.
- With the second weather-related state of emergency being declared in Puerto Rico, it occurs to me that Puerto Rico was a bad investment.
No thanks, I'd rather run over some nuns while drunk (me AND the nuns)
My father had a stroke or three.
I am typing this because you should know that people don't always hold up a sign saying I'M HAVING A STROKE. He just looked bad for a bit. We only noticed one side of his mouth droop and rushed him to the hospital. Fortunately he's a stubborn guy, like his son, and will eventually be ok. Tons of tests, watching for swallowing difficulties, and more tests. He walked into the emergency room, which says something. The other night, his advice for me was not to get sick. I will take him up on that immediately.
Watch carefully, ok? If someone looks bad, get them to their doctor quickly. If they look really bad, get them to the emergency room. The local hospital has a wonderful, kind staff; many of whom are very attractive. This is an important thing to watch for in hospitals.
The best thing I've seen so far: my mom waking my dad to ask if he's comfortable.
The best thing I've seen so far: my mom waking my dad to ask if he's comfortable.
This is a 100% non-partisan post:
Why does every picture of AOC look like this?
She looks very unhappy. She is not an unattractive woman - if she smiles... does she smile?
Heroes of the Stupid
An Oklahoma woman forced kids to eat dog feces. She somehow avoided jail, perhaps because the judge enjoys some nice feces now and then.
A woman who stabbed her boyfriend 39 times during a sex game has been freed from prison. This must be what they call Rough Sex.
SJW Attacks
A Sydney, Australia, university will lower the engineering entry bar for females as a part of a plan to get more women into the field. Do you want to live in a building designed by affirmative action engineers?
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