Except this year. They close at 6pm on Sunday (6:34 in New Jersey). I was sad. Let's face it - because of the sad state of retail, I am usually sad. Well, the sad state of retail and the refusal of the doctors to give me the meds that work, instead of the ones that make my hair grow only on the left side of my body.
Naturally I blame this on President Giveaway and Idiot Governor Tom Wolf, who put mandates in place during the Flying AIDS pandemic and closed businesses and randomly decreed other businesses 'essential.' I wonder what it looks like inside malls. My guess would be Empty. As empty as it has been all year. All malls we visited were uncluttered by those nasty stores. At least one had a Cinnabon, which made the trip tolerable.
So I was sad and Wife did the smart thing; went to bed (naturally with Dog trailing her). It was the smart thing because it's not pleasant to be around me when I'm sad; less so when I'm angry. Things tend to go flying across the house. Things like glasses, Heffalumps, and 1970s Chevrolets.
It's not that we're those odd pet owners, but Penny's not quite the puppy she was and the bed is really tall, so we bought her some stairs so she could get in the bed. Aside from Cockers for Cold Cuts, her other charity is Sleep Number Beds for Cockers. She was apoplectic when she heard other cockers don't have sleep number beds. She likes to stretch out. Unfortunately the sleep number bed belongs to the humans, but we learned to adjust. It's not that I sleep deeply, but I hear tell that the dog sometimes sleeps on my chest or my head. I laughed because I can't get Wife to do this.
Speaking of which, after we got married, we vowed we'd never go to bed angry. That's why I've been awake for the past 18 years.
After Thanksgiving, Black Fridays, Cyber Monday, Giving Tuesday, there's now Green Monday, which I believe is any Monday after Cyber Monday, retailers are out of their minds, trying to come up with more stupid sales days... let's help, shall we?
- Bottom of the Barrel Monday
- Shopping for ME weekend
- Gift Card Tuesday
- Buy a Stupid Gift Week
- Not Really a Sale Wednesday
- We're Out of Stock Thursday
- Nose Hair Clipper Friday
Little Johnny's mom took him shopping, then remembered why she hasn't taken him shopping the past year. Little Johnny is going to grow up to have a blog, because he doesn't know any better and has no filters...
- Mom, that guy is a trans... transsexual, like Dad watches when you're not home.
- HEY LADY - stop picking your nose and eating it!
- Mom, that lady has a leash on her kid. Why can't I follow them and bark?
- Look! That lady has no arms!
- Hi, Mrs. Smith. What's a hooker? Mom says you dress like a hooker.
As much as it pains me, I have to agree with Tesla, but the correct title of the article is "Tesla recalls every car with Autopilot as people are too stupid to use it correctly."
You can opt-out but it ain't easy
Humana sees nothing wrong, and is pretty excited by this result. Their humans only managed an error rate of 80%, so now more claims will be denied (especially cancer patients). Let's face it, folks... insurance is where you bet a very large, powerful corporation that they'll pay your claim. As they say in Vegas, "The house always wins."
Let’s attempt to decode Google’s confusing new location data settings
Let's not. Just say NO to Google.
Time slows down - really.
As I was sailing down over the steps, using air-gravity as the method, for the nth time, I think maybe it's a good idea to put a mattress at the bottom of the steps. A mattress and maybe one of those "I've fallen and I can't get up" buttons. No matter how many times I remind myself to remain in contact with ALL the steps, I find myself taking the airborne shortcut. Thus far I haven't hurt my head too badly, although many will argue this point. I have a doozy of a nasty-looking line on my arm. People might say I tried to commit suicide, but it's too far up and in the wrong direction. This goes to show you how bright people who say I tried to commit suicide are.
Xfinity waited 13 days to patch critical Citrix Bleed 0-day. Now it’s paying the price
For those of you playing along at home, there was a nasty flaw in some Citrix equipment. Xfinity did not patch the flaw immediately and got hit. Data on 36 million customers is in the hands of hackers. As for Comcast paying the price, I'm sure a very serious wrist-slapping is in order.
As we're watching commercials (the only thing left on tv), we start to notice people wearing these glasses that appear to be made of very dark I-beams. Mrs. lefty says they look like they're wearing furniture.
No comments:
Post a Comment