Wednesday, April 17, 2019

Joining the Hairy Krishnas

Sex enhances emotional bonds, boosts mood, and bolsters people's belief that life has meaning.  [The Post-Sex Blues, Sarah Hunter Murray, PHD]
Gimme more MEANING!
"But Honey... our life will have no meaning if we don't."




  • It's the little things: when you get text spam, forward it to 7726 (SPAM), which reports it to the appropriate authorities, through your carrier. You even get a nifty 'thank you' for reporting.


Dear lefty:
  • Does anybody actually read this shit?
  • No. Why are you writing to a fictional character, Chief?



I joke that this is not an entertainment blog - it's the chronicle of a man's descent into madness. How many more times do I have to say it before the universe makes it so? Is it already so? 



  • Florida Woman (but of course) Arrested After Pulling Gun on Person Who Asked Her to Stop Feeding Stray Cats.   Crazy cat lady? You decide.



Motel 6 will pay $12 million to settle a lawsuit that said several Washington state locations gave their guest lists to US Immigration and Customs Enforcement, according to the state attorney general's office.

The fallout will cost $12 million, but on the positive side, Motel 6 is now the official motel of government travel.  Motel 6 - for when you're not quite good enough to be Motel 7 or Motel 8.



  • Why is there an expiration date on my sugar?


If you're feeling short of Douche Chills, a woman was found to have four bees living in her eye. Damn the specifics.  When asked by doctors if she wanted them removed, she said no - she needed the honey.

Are we done?
Not by a long shot.
A Florida (shocking!) man has been caught (again), sticking his stinger in a bee hive. He has a sexual thing for them. The love that hurts.



Dear lefty:

  • What's the difference between bees in the eye and bees on the penis?
  • try both and let us know.



I like seeing doctors after work so it doesn't interfere. The other day I got my exam, left the room, and beheld total darkness. Then I apparently tripped the motion sensor. Some overly-competent employee turned off the lights, closed the office, and set the alarm. Does this shit happen to you too?







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