Mrs. lefty has multiple personalities, so it's never quiet upstairs. It's described as a playground where everybody's playing Whisper Down the Lane at once.
Penny jumps around and barks in her sleep, so that must be interesting too.
From descriptions, I have the best and most animated inner life.
There was the time Marshall came into bed, walked around on my chest til he found a comfortable spot, then went to sleep on my chest. I have absolutely no knowledge of this. It makes me wonder what other kinds of things happen in my sleep that I don't know about. It might also explain the pains that I get in my.. never mind.
Not comfortable with being a part-time dog bed, I apparently provide no end of audio entertainment. I laugh, cry, fight, and sing in my sleep. This is somewhat confusing, as I can't sing in real life. Can you imagine having to tell the club owner that we have to postpone the show - til I'm asleep?
I'm further informed that one does not want to be in the bed with me.
Actually, this is not news - I've been told for years that women don't want to be in bed with me. The specific here is that I reach out, grab, and occasionally punch the air. Mrs lefty tries not to be the air that gets punched. It may also explain the brick wall down the middle of the bed, and the bloodstains on my knuckles.
This is fairly fascinating to the wife, who monitors me closely while I sleep, perhaps waiting anxiously for my last breath. I thought it was funny at first, but it continues and gets worse: the exorcist was not worth what he was paid.
So that's my exciting inner life.
It's a shame that my real life is nowhere near as exciting. I was thinking of switching places, but considering some of the dreams I've had, I'll keep things as they are for now. No one wants to go Up There and see what's going on.
- Fender sent an email about a Telecaster promotion. Noting the link, I went to check it out. Fender has 36 righty Teles and 3 lefty Teles. yawn.
Dear lefty:
- Did you know Border Collies are among the smartest dogs?
- Did you know that if you have sex with someone who has a cold and get the cold, it's considered a sexually transmitted disease?
I had to quit therapy - if I got my issues fixed, I wouldn't be funny anymore.
Some would argue that train left the station a long time ago.
- The other day, one of my work systems identified a connection to Microsoft as malware. The computers are finally starting to agree with me!
Jack and Jill went up the hill.
Hills are a tool of white privilege.
- We're going to look back on this period and laugh.
- But not in a good way.
It's been a long time since I recommended any music.
Let's keep it that way.
Speaking of which, ZZ Top is touring again/still. Talk about some hard workin' men. You should see them - always entertaining. Wave to us - I'll be the one with the hat. Also pick up Billy Gibbons' solo albums.
Seriously, folks, get out there and support your favorite acts. They're getting up there and you never know what will happen. My heroes are all in their 70s. I see them every chance I can, whenever I can get someone to help steer the rocket-propelled Chevrolet.
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