Nah, I'm just kidding. I steal all this stuff from some other unsuccessful blog.
- Greetings to my visitors from Ukraine. We go way back.. I knew you when you used to be The Ukraine.
I have already warned against the Ring video doorbells.
In my previous rant, they were given to police to shill in their neighborhoods, allowing 'video sharing.' Video sharing means warrantless surveillance. The icing on the cake comes with facial recognition plans, via a neighborhood watch app. Amazon itself has stated this is on its way.
The people shocked by 1984 agree that we're already in 1987.
You're already at risk with the Ring: anything that connects to the net should be bulletproof. Wanna make a bet the Ring is? Who has access to this data besides you? Are you sharing data with the neighborhood, the police, and Amazon? If not (yeah, right), what is the legal process for the police to obtain the video? Sure, you could turn it over voluntarily, but what if you don't want to? With facial recognition, everybody's going in the database. Nothing good will come from any of this. How do I know? The same way you do: look at our history... if something can be used, it will. No exceptions. This is another step in Surveillance Society. Like England, we'll not be able to go anywhere without being on camera - including our own front porch. Combine this with our Alexas, and Amazon has our entire lives, with the police being one click away.
Before you say, "Let them watch - I have nothing to hide," understand that you are guaranteed freedom from illegal search and seizure via the Fourth Amendment (in the US, in theory). This also applies to phone/email/net spying, but that ship has sailed.
Dear lefty
- Why do they call it global warming when it's so cold outside?
- Because you touched yourself too much when you were little.
YouTube has a closed captioning option. I had no idea.
How did I find this out?
The dog.
She thinks she's the only thing allowed on my lap, which is unfortunate when I'm using my laptop. I removed her paws from the keyboard and discovered that she somehow managed to scroll to the bottom of the page and turn on CC. At least one of us has some brains.
In these days of Commercial Excess<tm>, Black Friday seems to be creeping up on us. Not because it's close, but because it keeps getting earlier. Bloody xmas decorations are up in stores, weeks before T-Day. Then the pre-Black Friday sales. Now the Black Friday sales the week BEFORE Black Friday. I got notice of these recently, days before the week before Black Friday.
Fair warning: next year, Black Friday will be on Valentine's Day, and you had better have the lights and tree up before the end of February or the Commercial Police will throw you in Retail Jail.
Last year we finally managed to get a tree up. And when I say finally managed, I mean we definitely stated we were going to have one up. Then it was definitely going up by xmas eve. Then xmas day, but screw it. This year we have agreed early that we're going to have a tree this year, so we'll have even more time not to put it up! There was a lot to be said for those very silly artificial jobbies, that came right out of the box, complete with lights and ornaments already installed. All you had to do was locate it first (it had been in the way the entire year, so now you can't find it) and put on the single personal ornament you bought a few years ago, but haven't had a tree since, so it's new! You will also discover that you have two trees. You have no idea where the second one came from.
The sales flyers (all in email now) are coming fast and furious. One guitar company has been doing 50% off days. An amplifier website has 15% off everything. They're giving away pedals that aren't 35% off. I tell Mrs lefty about all the money I'm saving her with these sales, but she reacts the same was I do when she tells me how much she saved ME by buying 5 pairs of shoes instead of one. Look at the advantages... you don't have to shop or wonder what I want, or stand in lines and fight the rest of humanity, many of whom have been up for 3 days on meth and think it's Easter. Simply click the online form, insert payment information, and they'll friggin deliver it, regardless of how much it weighs. If we feel nostalgic for in-person shopping, for a small fee they'll give the delivery driver some meth.
Speaking of saving money, I managed to find the same deal as last year, at Southpaw Guitars (THE lefty guitar store). By selecting a used guitar, I saved my wife $1,000! The $4,000 Custom Shop Fender 1956 Stratocaster reproduction is only $3,000 used, thus saving $1,000. I am willing to make the sacrifice for my wife. It's at least what we spend on shoes....
Also speaking of which, Peets Coffee has a subscription plan, where you pick your favorite coffee and they'll send as many as you want at whatever interval you like. If you're serious about your coffee, their French Roast is the only thing I drink - highly recommended. If you aren't a dark roast person, they have light and medium, in all sorts of varieties, from countries you didn't know existed, plus teas. No, I don't get anything for mentioning them (the bastards).
- Black Friday deal from a local venue: Air Supply, Dancing with the Stars Live, and Teresa Caputo (aka Hair Helmet).
- No thanks, I'm having elective dental surgery those days.
According to a study, cows might produce better milk when fitted with VR headsets. The study failed when the cows were found tuning into humanality porn.
- Here's a mind-bender. George Harrison watching the Beatles performing 'This Boy'.
President Trump is designating Mexican drug cartels terrorists.
Oh great - War on Mexico. What could possibly go wrong?
- I just saw a listing of audiobooks. Among them was Playboy.
- How does that work?
- Well, you're not getting any, so look at pictures.
- You could listen to the audiobook, because you don't deserve to look at the pictures. You know it's over when......
Speaking of books, I found a few others....
Abnormal Psychology: I don't need a book. All I have to do is look around.
You Are Worth It: No, I'm not.
Why We're Wrong About Nearly Everything: ah, finally a present for your spouse
Facing Codependency: not without you I'm not...
Handbook of Forensic Psychology: learn how the dead think and feel
- Emoji are a vital part of online communication
- How long til they discover memes? Good God.....
Today I identify as bits of string
The FDA has granted permission for a studies of psilocybin for treatment of Major Depressive Disorder (MDD). In other words, if you're seriously depressed, ask your doc for shrooms, man. The FDA's carefully considered medical decision is brought to you by the MMB (Mushroom Marketing Board).
While we're on the subject, another study found that a dose of ketamine may cut down on problematic drinking. By making the person so stoned, they can't pick up a glass.
India's prime minister has said defecating in the open has ended in rural India.
He is competing for the $150 million contract for California.
- Very large water main break in San Francisco: governor passes law against water main breaks because it might clean the shit off sidewalks, which is racist.
Heroes of the Stupid
An Australian firefighter has been accused of arson.
Firefighting attracts arsonists like priesting attracts...well, you get the idea.
Amazon pulls Aushwitz-themed Christmas Ornaments (?)
SJW Stunts
- To fight stigma, New Zealand is opening an HIV-positive sperm bank.
- New Zealand tax dollars also used to open the first Ebola-positive pancreas bank.
Elizabeth Warren introduced a bill that would revoke Medals of Honor from US soldiers involved in the Wounded Knee Massacre on 1890. This is the kind of prompt action you can expect if you vote for her, the 1/6400th Indian African American candidate.
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