Real Questions Department:
Why is there a lemon on the couch?
All of our dogs were black. Penny is red. She sheds like a mofo, and it shows up on everything. The vacuum is on strike, and refuses to pick up red hair, but will pick up everything else. The next door neighbor has shingles, and all I did was suggest she replace some of the shingles on my roof.....
One of our local outdoor concert venues canceled its schedule for the year.
This was quickly followed by uncanceling its schedule. I'm trying to figure out how they socially distance... 6' is about 12 concert seats, so there will only be 3 people in each row. Tedeschi Trucks is coming and shouldn't be missed.
The local news showed state police enforcing distancing regulations at downtown bars. I'm sorry, but I have to put my foot down: the staties have many more important things to do than enforce distancing. Do they even have jurisdiction? Did the female patrons appreciate their shorts?
Best Headline: Two men arrested after police officers find nothing suspicious on plane.
Strange Headline: Coronavirus: Will women have to work harder after the pandemic? Women often say they have to work harder to prove themselves than men - will Covid-19 turn back the clock for women's careers? Will green be a different shade? Will tires still be round? Can we continue to call them black?
Remdesivir may work even better against COVID than we thought.
As we thought it didn't work, it would have to work better.
No clue.
I'm Joe Biden and I approve this message.
Well, they told me I approved it.
Did I approve it?
What message?
Good Taste: Find it Elsewhere
There is a telemedicine abortion.
No, really. The doc tells you to reach on up there and...
I'm kidding.
The doctor tells you to fall down the steps.
I'm still kidding.
The doctor prescribes a pill.
SJW Sloth
San Francisco museum curator resigns after he is accused of racism for saying he would still collect art from white men.
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