Your love is like bifurcated tongue on purpose
I need your help, readers.
We need to do all we can to get napping added to the next Olympics. I will bring home the gold!
Today I identify as the entire mixed-gender Olympic bumper cars team
You can't help but notice our celebrities and rock stars are dropping off like mad. Cancer and even old age are taking them. They've given so much to us and now it's time to give back: I'm introducing the Adopt-A-Celebrity program. We all chip into a fund to have our favorite people medically tested weekly. If I lost Jeff Beck, I'd be inconsolable. Dammit, I'm still dealing with the loss of Frank Zappa. If we had gotten Frank checked more frequently, he'd still be here with us. So we'd pay to get them checked on a weekly or monthly basis, prolonging their lives and assuring ourselves more of that golden output. So it's more of an enlightened altruism, but it works out best for all. Remember: Adopt-A-Celebrity today! Special rates for Alec Baldwin and bands I don't like.
This Tesla news is not about a Tesla - it's about an Elon Musk tweet. He deleted it after 12 hours, but it was a picture of Hitler, with the words "Stop comparing me to Justin Trudeau. I had a budget." You just can't make a good Hitler joke these days. I'm getting disgusted at the Speech Police. If you don't like it, don't read it.. this goes for anything from anyone.
Microsoft Strikes Again
You will need a Microsoft account to set up Windows 11. With Windows 10 and currently 11, you can set up a local account. This is going away.
Windows should be going away. You owe it to yourself to use a different, privacy-intensive operating system. At work, everything I do is available to my coworkers - they just have to click on my profile and they can see what programs I have been using. Do you think Microsoft fails to take advantage of this? I don't need an account to set up a Mac or use linux. Windows 10 should have started the stampede away from Microsoft, yet it didn't.
Using linux, you can put together a desktop that looks and works exactly like Windows, so there's very little learning time. You can run a 'live usb' version, which will show you how it works and not change anything on your hard drive. If you have any questions, ask away.
- Sydney shark attack: Beaches reopen after British swimmer's death
- authorities are stymied as to the lower numbers of swimmers
It's been a fun week of weather: during the week, we've seen just about every kind of weather, focusing largely on clouds and precipitation. Today it's so windy, cars and small houses have been seen blowing down the streets. The news said it was 20-30-40mph gusts. Interestingly enough, small amounts of sun are managing to appear between the clouds, like talent appearing in songs on the radio. Some younger people on the block have never seen the sun and have to be therapized accordingly. No one is too concerned, because the sun will only disappear when the clouds have noticed it got through.
Definition
refrigerator: where you put stuff to keep it warmer than the air outside
Dad takes down town's
internet by mistake to get his kids offline
What are you complaining about? The kids couldn't get online - mission accomplished....
Back to the dentist.
It went precisely as I figured, with the Doc looking at the previously-donated tooth site and telling me it was fine. Sure it was fine, except for taking pain relievers every four hours, lady. Then she started to do some more serious extracting, this time from my wallet. The prices to do anything involving putting back a tooth are beyond ridiculous. Some of them, not covered by insurance, cover a Fender Custom Shop guitar. Aside from that, the procedure gives me the screaming heebie-jeebies (technical term). My insurance is kind enough to cover half of the bridges we're building. By the time they're done, my mouth will be a series of holes, bumps, and bridges, none of which you want to cross.
Naturally, they 'discovered' several more teeth that required 'things' done to them.
I don't remember being told about this, but I suspect this is part of the Dental Operation: Shock and Awe. They beat you with Major Stuff<tm>, then you're likely to approve anything else of a smaller nature. They're quite clever that way, like Dick Cheney. As part of Shock and Awe, after the doctor is done, they send back a staff member to discuss what the options will cost. Sometimes this is so shocking, they don't need to numb teeth. So they send back the most attractive staff member in the office to go over everything, so if you're a guy (or lesbian), your brain is fried between looking at the prices and looking at the tech. They have her strategically unbutton a few buttons on her shirt to further befuddle you. By the time I got back home, when Wife asked me how it went, I just shook my head and continued to mumble "expensive.... boobies.... Chrissie.... boobies..." and she got the general idea. To further confuse me, Chrissie sat with me a while and discussed personal stuff: she has a pet alligator names Alowishcious, just went up to DD with her new implants, and will only swallow on special occasions. I 'forgot' to tell Wife about this part. I suspect the office pays for the implants for the girls and writes it off as a business expense.
So all that's left is to make an appointment. This is like making an appointment for.. the dentist.... oh, wait.... for the..
- According to my email, Fluffy tickets are now on sale!
- I wonder if they're fuzzy too, and maybe nice to touch.
So it's the weekend and we try to get out a little.
Naturally you know something's coming.
Wife took Saturday off, so she and dog stayed in bed.
I was up bright and early Sunday (1:30pm), which pretty much ruled out anything but food.
I know we're foolish, but the ads for a certain damn near Italian chain really make the food look good (as opposed to Sonic, whose ads are used to cure constipation). Last time we went, there was a 45 minute wait, which I don't.
Deciding to get breakfast early (4pm), we took the small car. Which wouldn't start (with the new $300 battery). Neither the car nor I like the cold.
Off we went, in the larger car.
Annnnnnd the Garden of Olives had a 40 minute wait.
One could say at least they're consistent.
I wouldn't say that, because I was cursing in a way that would make the entire navy blush.
Plan B was in effect, so we had a nice breakfast there.
As we were pulling up to the house, Wife said "That's the check engine light, isn't it?"
Why yes, yes it IS the check engine light.
Do I have to shove some sage up my ass and light it?
Even the doctors tell me we get way more than our share of bad luck. They should know - they went to 10 years more school than me.
HE: As I was saying, before I kept getting interrupted...
SHE: [interrupts] But I don't interrupt.
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