Are you kidding me? I can't even get readers to comment. ThermionicEmissions will remain the most eye-assaulting blog on the web. It's all about the content anyway....
Your love is like eating Legos
Google has a secret iOS app to help you switch to Android
You can lead a horse to a phone, but you can't make him change
Today I identify as some pronouns
Ouch. Two bad words: Senate and mandate.
You know this is being pushed by industry.
We need to leave the web alone. Period.
- The American Dental Association was hit with the Black Basta Ransomware
- Unfortunately it wasn't covered by their insurance
Read it - the logic is stunning.
50% of you elected him and we're all constantly paying
And now, it's the drones:
Biden wants to give state and local police access to drone-tracking tech
Who's going to protect us from police drones?
We all know coffee is a magical elixir that helps us start the day. Then move the day. Then get through the day. Then keep us from falling over, asleep, during the day. The most important part being starting the day. Using flavored liquid creamer is also important, as it's one and done - no sugar or powder needed. This morning got weird. This is not my usual weird, this is a whole different kinda weird. The kinda weird that I didn't need and didn't help at all in starting my day. My creamer, caramel, tasted weird. In fact it tasted like hazelnut. I checked the bottle, thinking it looked similar and got picked up by mistake, but no - it said caramel. This is a fine thing to happen to a person minding his own business in the morning. And if we choose to return it, imagine the person at the return counter listening to the complaint...
"Ok, Sir, it's labeled caramel but tastes like hazelnut. Yes, Sir. I'm sure it does. It happens all the time. Will you please move behind the yellow line for my safety? Thank you."
Faceyspaces Strikes Again
With their history of idiocy and harm, Faceyspaces could rape kittens and get away with it.
Flying AIDS News
She is fortunately asymptomatic and wants everybody to know this is a very diverse variant.
- Mrs. lefty suggested I put out only one blog entry a week and blame it on supply chain issues.
The internal hand-wringing, arms-throwing about, running around and screaming reaction to Elon Musk buying Twitter has come out, and it's even better than you thought. People are very upset at the concept of free speech and what it could do to their progressive bent and the next election.
Fresh off his mental health take on the Depp/Heard trial, Doctor Lawyer lefty weighs in on this. The answer, of course, is yes. The First Amendment keeps us from the establishment of religion. A public school is state-run, therefore prayer is establishment, same as bible readings in class. If it were a private school, no problem. This is not a religious freedom argument - he has freedom to practice his religion anywhere else but on state-owned grounds.
God hasn't produced peace, so I don't think he's interested in your football game.
Dear God, we humbly ask your help in blowing our opponents to bits, in thy name.
Today's Safety Warning
I received a text, telling me a friend wanted me to join them at Google news. Type YES for the url.
I'm not going to test the theory, but I did the first thing you should do: asked the friend if they sent it. The answer, of course, was no. Forward to 7746 (SPAM) and delete. Notify the friend to change passwords NOW, just in case.
lefty Attenborough's Hour of Animals
Portugal has a lot of land. But we're not going to discuss that today.
Portugal has islands too.
Down south is Desertas Grande ("bigass ice cream sundae"), where there are two main inhabitants. Ok, two interesting inhabitants. First there is the wolf spider. It has eight eyes and can reach 5.5" (12 quarts Canadian) across. Because of the wolf spider, nobody visits the island. It will attack anything it thinks it can eat, like lizards, cows, and small cars.
Swimming around the island are the last of the [something or other] seals, hunted almost to extinction by very very naughty people. It is estimated that there are about thirty left (seals, not naughty people). Once a year, environmentalists invade to measure this and that, and install streaming cameras. This has the effect of really annoying the seals, who refuse to reproduce if they are going to be streamed in the process. Meanwhile, sealpr0n.com is raking in the money.
The seals can stay under water for fifteen minutes without surfacing, which enables a siesta after lunch. The first thing that occurs to me is what it looks like when seals sleep. Some pull under a cliff and sleep upside down, bellies up. This coincidentally is the way human males sleep. Sometimes it's the way human males reproduce. The only way to tell which is to look at the expression on the human female's face. Belly up is also the way city employees work, but this is only a theory, as no one can find anyone present or working at City Hall.
Many nature shows have discovered that the Portuguese people speak Portuguese but nobody knows why. Brazilians do too, although they are quite far from each other. There are theories that Portugal broke off from Brazil and traveled to the Mediterranean. Warning: do not use Google or any other translator to go from Brazilian Portuguese to Portugal Portuguese. It is very slightly off and you wouldn't want any wacky mishaps.
Brazil: Good morning.Portugal: Your mother is a sewage line.Brazil: How are you today?Portugal: Your mother sniffs socks, but she's not very good at it.
Brazil: It's a hot one today.Portugal: Your mother is a hot one. Everybody says so.
The women in Brazil are exquisite, as they are in Portugal, especially if you like enormous buttocks. Women with average size buttocks can be found, but it will require a small expedition. If you go in search of the average size buttock female, do NOT go to Desertas Grande. They have spiders the size of your head that eat babies.
Week's best title for something or other: Catalytic Hydrogenation Phthalate Plasticizers (or Don't Get it on Your Fingers)
My niece has been in contractions for a week. They tell me this is not all that great. Fortunately I am a guy, therefore exempt from all this stuff. The women all talk about it and the guys either nod their heads or are kept in the dark, gratefully, by their wives, who know it's just not good to talk about this with this husbands. It is a fact women are stronger than men and can deal with bodily functions, plus they're smart enough not to involve their husbands (with any more than cigars and drinks).
Dear Adobe
It would be extremely helpful, as well as most productive, if when I clicked on a feature, the entire program didn't crash.
Thank you.
It's interesting that the climate change people haven't gone after wireless charging. It's grossly inefficient; it wastes large amounts of energy that should be charging your phone. So if you want to do your part, plug the phone in to charge it.
Chaos erupted when Americans brought a 'souvenir' through an Israeli airport: an unexploded shell.
These people are too stupid to fly. Have them swim.
What could possible have gone wrong when bringing a shell on a plane?
Was it in the same case as their automatic weapon or the dirty bomb?
- Mastodon, the social network, saw 30,000 new users after Elon Musk bought Twitter.
- Think about this... Thirty thousand people are terrified of free speech, and would prefer to delete speech with which they don't agree.
- [holds hands over ears] LA LA LA LA I can't hear you
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