Your love is like Jeffrey Epstein's
Here's some interesting hacking news:
Hackers who released info on Arab royal families apologized.
Turns out Arab royal families don't argue - they send out hit squads.
They may have something there, although I'm not sure hospitals could justify hit teams on their payroll.
Biden crusade against ‘domestic extremism’ spurs thousands of FBI probes, fears of a police state
President Taxit has not left the damage at taxing us to death - now he's on domestic extremism. Bush the Lesser did this too. There was a naughty list that included Ron Paul supporters, people waving flags, people talking about the Constitution, and Insane Clown Posse fans. ICP sued and got off the naughty list, but the rest of us....
Biden must go. Start with impeachment.
Today I identify as Christmas music in October
Where, oh where, has our Gavin gone?
California governor (and part time Christmas tree stand) Gavin Newsom has disappeared from public view for ten days,
It's ok, I got this.
Gavin was caught saying things like, "socialism is bad" and "we must keep the homeless from shitting on the sidewalks." Alarmed that he had attained a modicum of sanity, Newsom was spirited away, to an undisclosed location, to have the tiny amount of sense vacuumed from his head. Not to worry, California, the same old hilarious governor will be back soon.
- The head doctor of a B.C. clinic just diagnosed a patient with 'climate change.'
- the doctor was summarily diagnosed with overload and took a few weeks off to visit the Happy Place
Flying AIDS News
Molnupiravir: First pill to treat Covid gets approval in UK
Northern Ireland’s health minister is suing Van Morrison after the
singer called him “very dangerous” for his handling of coronavirus
restrictions.
I just want to point out here that America doesn't get these kinds of side effects. But it's not worth moving to the UK.
And another thing.... a Russian porn star was 'detained' after flashing her bare buttocks in front of the Kremlin.
Again, not in America. America needs to lead, not follow.
- You think you're talented? I can tomato sauce stain my shirt without actually eating
Local News
A Pennsylvania fifteen year old girl is in the news after a video of her having sex with twenty five guys went viral. Unfortunately, ThermionicEmissions is not able to locate the video and does NOT support video of underage sex. We cannot reveal her identity, due to her age, but we got an interview:
TE: So, howya doin'?
Girl: Fine, thank you.
TE: Still sore?
Girl: you have no idea.
TE: So, uh, why?
Girl: I've been thinking about it. I think there are a number of reasons...
- After looking online, I discovered you can't have sex without taping it. It's against some law or other.
- I have the mother of all daddy issues
- Ten guys just weren't doing it for me
- practicing for the Olympics
- my girlfriends all did twenty, so I wanted to show them up
- my mom has been great to me and stayed home to raise me. I needed to act out.
- I'm on tv and the queen of the internet!
So how about that tragic Travis Scott/Drake concert. Eight dead.
They were running away. From the music.
- Why You Should Delete Google Chrome On Your Phone
- They're years behind me. Delete anything Google.
The American Trucking Associations (ATA) estimates that the US is short
80,000 truckers - an all time high for the industry. And if nothing
changes, the shortfall could reach 160,000 over the next decade.
I never got an answer to the honest question: why do most black and latina women have large backsides? I need to know the science. Why is it genetically important?
Speaking of genetics, a recent article mentioned that the most popular category of pr0n is incest.
There seems to be something wrong here.
I'm sure you're with me: at no time during your years did you want to boink anyone in your home.
I realize it's fantasy, but it has to be based upon something.
I had a few cousins I wanted to be more friendly with, but that's kinda boring.
"Hey Mom. you look pretty good there, stuck under the couch...."
"Yo, Bro... it's ok cuz you're my STEP-bro."
"No Dad, I will not do stuff Mom doesn't do anymore.."
"Sis - why don't you fill up my tank instead of having sex with me to borrow my car?"
Apologies to all of you who don't watch pr0n.
Oh cut it out.
I attended the Philly Fall Guitar Show recently.
It wasn't much fun if you were a lefty, but it was great to get out and be with all that equipment (see guitar blog).
For the first time in a long time, I was an asshole magnet<tm> while driving.
After a while, it appeared the curse was back.
They love me.
They only want to be close to me.
And by close, I mean in front of me
And by in front of me, I mean doing 20 miles under the speed limit. On the Turnpike.
They love me.
Most of the time, people are whizzing by at 20 miles over the limit.
This time they couldn't wait to get near me, so they could slow down.
Granted, our roads were planned by drunk monkeys, and the 'improvements' made things much worse.
But they love me, and only want to be near me.
On a Saturday morning, there was traffic. I feel sorry for the people who drive during rush hour.
"LEAVE ME ALONE," I cried.
"But we LOVE you." they said, lovingly.
"Get fscked," I countered.
"We only want to be near you," they said.
"I''m doing the speed limit, whether you like it or not," I told them.
"Oh no you're not!" was their response.
The spring guitar show isn't til July, so I don't have to leave the house again til then.
- Peruvian family dog turns out to be a fox
- cuz they look so much alike... cue Peru jokes...
Everybody's talking Climate Change.
I want to do my part, even though the real polluters aren't.
- cut down farting to Tuesdays and Sundays
- I get carbon credits for rarely leaving the house
- holding a sign about climate change on weekends. Preferably outside.
- masturbating in the dark
- talking about electric cars a lot
- watching pr0n on battery power
- having sex on Saturdays (which would be a 100% improvement)
Back on the left handed horse... we demand PARITY!
Police pull us over. If we were black, we could scream RACISM!
Screaming "You pulled us over because we're left handed" just won't work.
We will never be truly equal until being left handed can get us something.
- California couple sue clinic for alleged IVF swap 'horror'
- named baby Abby. Abby Normal.
Former Bishop Xavier Novell reportedly began a new job at Semen Cardona, a company which produces and exports high-quality pig semen to over 20 countries.
I'd say the people who accused him are possessed.
But PIG SEMEN!
There's a show called "Nightmre Neighbor Next Door"
These people are truly warped, and not in a good way.
One lady pushed another lady down steps. Parking and trash fights, online tirades, police, etc.
This is nice, but hardly compares to some of my experience....
- the lady next door took exception to my flamethrower, even before her house burnt down (not my fault - I was out on that day).
- the Homeowners' Association sued a neighbor for painting her steps
- the lady next door took exception to my automatic weapons (even before the holes in her house)
- the guy on the other side parked his car. For 10 hours. Every night.
- the lady next door took exception to my stockpile of nuclear weapons...
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