Dammit, Why Do I Listen to Me?

Your love is like   deep fried grease bits

I know I have to do the dishes. Normally they're called Zombie Dishes, because every time I do them, they're back the next day, like zombies from the dead. I recently noticed the amount of dishes ramps up when we cook a lot. I feel all kinds of scientific, when in reality, it just takes me a long time to notice stuff. It did not take me long to notice the tree-pruning shears. I told Wife it was a great improvement over the hedge trimmers, which I borrowed and, along with the hockey mask, took to terrifying the neighbors (more). Something was missing, though, and I realized the hedge trimmers were electric and I needed a power cord. So I went out and bought a gas-powered chainsaw, which really raised the level of horror. 

Today I identify as  one of Google's most popular and influential blogs.  I couldn't type that with a straight face.

Mainstream or Pr0n

This is the exclusive ThermionicEmissions game where the reader picks whether the 2 movies or tv shoes are mainstream or pr0n.  No looking it up on the web - that's cheating.

1. Stepsister Wants Me
2. The Masked Furry

Leave your answer in the comments.

So it's been a year since Russia invaded Ukraine. It's absolutely unconscionable. It's 2023 - what does that lunatic hope to achieve and why is there war? People on both sides are dying, which is unacceptable. I don't have anything against the Russians or the Ukrainians (the people). Putin is an old school bully and history will remember him as such. But it's interesting that this has gone on a year and the combined(?) efforts of the world haven't dissuaded him.

When it started, I was adamant about the US keeping their feet off the ground (one of Obama's famous lies). Then I heard what President Giveaway was sending over. Then the military armaments. Probably military 'advisors.'  The president just issued more sanctions on Russia (because Putin cares). And to everyone's surprise, gave $550 million to Ukraine and Moldova to strengthen their energy infrastructure. Hey, don't we have a problem with the Chinese in our electrical system and white supremacists shooting up substations to foment a race war?  America was surprised bv President Giveaway's $550 million gift. They were surprised it wasn't $550 billion. 

The US government added that more security services will be provided to Ukraine including new drone systems, high-mobility rocket systems, ammunition for artillery systems and communications gear. 

Like I said, there is only one winner in every war: the military industrial complex. 

This guy needs to be impeached before he personally ratchets the Debt more than any 6 presidents and Congresses. Small wonder the Trump signs are appearing. I'm still the local representative for the Green Pen for president. Remember: with the Green Pen, there will be no red ink, and anything has to be better than Biden. I didn't think anything could tear me away from my libertarian roots, but The Pen is it!

Why being declared dead when you're alive still occurs

Don't you hate when that happens? I often get declared dead, but I think it's because I don't move much.

Two ways to shut your wife down

1. Excuse me, at what time today do you believe I started caring about that?
2. Perhaps it would make you feel better if I massaged your breasts

You can't lose, especially if she goes for #2.

81% of international flights into NYC had SARS-CoV-2 in waste, small trial finds

We cannot stand (sit?) for the latest invasion into our private business. Sure. they'll claim the data is aggregated and non-identifiable, but they're full of... you know what I mean.  It's getting so one cannot excrete waste without having their privacy invaded. Is this the world in which you want to live? Is nothing sacred?

Whose idea was this? How do they come up with this shit? How is it measured? How much is normal? Will you get Amazon ads for Home Sars Test Kits? Toilet paper? Will the TSA back up when you get in line to have your breasts checked for offensive weapons?

I think I have a magnetic personality, but it must have a switch. People tell me I'm easy to talk to (I couldn't make that up). I suspect something to do with my office triggers it, mostly with Wife. Whatever it is, I become the Most Magnetic I could be, when I'm in the office, doing something that requires concentration, or an online meeting. Just the other day....

[online meeting, everyone can see each other]  Yes, blah blah, yes, no, those really hot stockings... yes..

[Wife appears at door with a container of flavored creamer. She is cognizant of me being in a meetingl so she doesn't make a sound. She just points to the creamer, so I guess that I can guess what she means. This is a metaphor for our relationship. Mind you, I'm supposed to be participating or at least looking interested in the meeting, but I have to look away at this Creamer Spectacle. Since she's 'not interrupting me' by speaking, I have to guess....]

Yes. that's creamer.

[shakes head, points to creamer just as before, as if that should clue me in. I remain clueless.]

Yes, we need more.

[shakes head, points to creamer just as before, as if that should clue me in. I remain clueless.]

It sure is a nice day today.

[moves mouth without making a sound]  No. Would you make me a coffee?

POOF - you're a coffee.

[shakes head, barely whispers]  No, you make it better.

I'm sorry, is there a fire here? No? I'm in a meeting. 

[whispers] That's why I'm not making noise to bother you.

I see. YOU MIGHT AS WELL SPEAK UP THEN.

I need some coffee.

I hate to say this, but you're going to have to wait an hour til this meeting is over.

ha-RUMPH. Well.... how much creamer do you put in?

Til it tastes right.

ha-RUMPH. Ok.

I just want to know what it is about important work events that triggers a need in Wife to interrupt me. Of course she's not interrupting me because she's not making a sound. Sometimes I get a little agitated, and she knows to walk away. The problem is that she comes back, with the question she was trying to ask written on a sticky note.

I sometimes think about asking how this remains 'not interrupting me', but I suspect the answer would make my head hurt. It would continue for the rest of the day, torpedoing any useful work I could perform. Sometimes I give up and answer, for what's left of my own sanity.

TSA raises alarm amid increase in guns at US airports

Ever since 2001, I referred to the TSA as Security Theater. And it is.

This story, however, proves that passengers are performing Stupid Theater. 

Let's be serious: my mother, half out of her mind, was not allowed to bring certain shampoo because there was more in the container than the 'allowed' amount. And these MENSA candidates are bringing guns.

Unless there's an organized group trying to tweak the TSA's nose, we should be ashamed.

Tesla's self-driving beta code may ignore stop signs, act unsafe. Patch coming ... soon

So it ignores stop signs - so do most people with cars. Some say Musk got this into the news to take the spotlight off the steaming hole that is Twitter. Musk is upset about the characterization of recall, since the fix will be delivered over the air (software update to the car). 

It might be that I'm too critical of driverless cars, but I can't imagine them leaving the manufacturer with software that sometimes ignores stop signs. I believe that to be kind of an important thing. I also have no trouble waiting until the software is 99% good. Again: not ready for prime time. Would you use driverless BETA software? Much like Windows, the customers are the beta testers.

Speaking of Tesla but not about Tesla specifically:

Unplug that Anker battery pack now: House blaze sparks recall

Perhaps batteries are also not ready for prime time. Their tendency to auto-combust is worrying (he said, with typical British understatement, even though he's not British). A recall typically brings to mind sending things back. Anker says to skip the sending and throw them out immediately. Anker will be sued then fined out of existence when the batteries spontaneously combust in the trash system.

To be fair, we can't blame this on Elon Musk. However, we can blame the upcoming verbal hue and cry over Twitter 'security' on Musk. Twitter users pretty much got herded into using Two Factor Authentication (2FA) to log in. For example, you'd log in with your login and password, then Twitter would send a code to your phone, which you would also use. Those 2 factors made signing in safer, a giant PITA, and Twitter would know your phone number. There are other ways, including an app. Musk decided that 2FA would only be available to paying Twitter-ers ($11 month), as of March 20th. While this may help produce revenue,  he didn't consider the back-end. Twitter will spend eons dealing with account hacks. You don't put a price on security: you secure everybody and everything, to save yourself a ton of grief. As a guess, Twitter will be hamstrung when the account hacks start. It's historically been slow to respond. Watch what happens when a department that doesn't generate revenue becomes really very incredibly busy.

NASA Mars orbiter reveals China’s Zhurong rover has not moved for months

China insists this is propaganda. They claim that the American rovers haven't moved, but the Zhurong is superior in every way and more difficult to spell. It is actually hundreds of feet in the air, taking readings of the air up there. They also say that the American rovers keep trying to shoot down the Zhurong balloon rover, which is for peaceful purposes, and simply got off track.

Just to prove narcissism and SJWs aren't limited to the US, a singer opened a basketball game and changed a word in Canada's national anthem for her chosen cause.  Frank Zappa has a few releases called "Shut Up and Play Your Guitar," which, strangely, were all instrumental. This was because people wanted to hear him play more. How about "Shut Up and Sing the National Anthem"? Will SJW-dom ever cease? (No) If you want to change your national anthem, get a petition signed by at least 80% of the country's population. Prime Minister Trudeau was so incensed, he put down his soy latte and left the dress shop.

For the next basketball game, the Canadian Basketball Association announced the players will take a knee (somebody else's), make a short, 1 hour speech on their favorite cause, then play baseball. They are certain the fans will welcome the change. Just in case they don't, the CBA ordered the stadium doors locked and all the fans will be enrolled in mandatory sensitivity training.