So I'm sitting there, in a meeting. There are 27 other people in the meeting and we're getting nowhere. I'm starting to get edgy, and you know what that means: I've got the potato chip clips out and I'm attaching them to my balls. We can't even get people to agree on which problem is the actual problem. Meanwhile, there are 3 people telling the meeting owner what the actual problem is. They taught me right after I was hired not to say, "Hey, Jackass, do what I tell you. Stop talking like you know something." My head hurts, the phone is ringing, and I'm out of clips.
Your love is like a barber who'd rather be a lumberjack
So this vote counting thing goes on and on. It's been delightfully peaceful, as if a hole suddenly opened up and all the assholes got sucked into it.
In unrelated news, Antifa, BLM, the Proud Boys, and others have absolutely nothing to do. They're all sitting around, in the middle of the street, with empty signs and no motivation. There's nothing to do.
How about we march due to the high price of milk?
Nah, done it.
Protest the conditions in jails?
We did that last week.
I know... we can protest those people who protest and block streets!
But that's US!
Oh. How bout the rising price of meat?
We're vegans.
How about we play baseball?
Do you seriously want any of us near bats?
Man, this protesting stuff is hard. I know - we can block streets, protesting that there's nothing to protest!
You might have something there.
Yeah, we can be violently against slow vote counting, until it's time to get back to being anti-Trump.
We're PRO-Trump.
We are?
Yes.
Are you sure?
Yes - ask Cooper. His group is anti-Trump. Last week they smashed Trump Tower.
Then what are we?
We're PRO-Trump.
What do WE do?
Largely hang around, looking threatening, and occasionally beating one of those guys up.
Doesn't sound like a lot of fun.
No, it's not.
Well then why?
I don't know - we've just always done it.
Well how about this year, we ALL stay home and stop behaving like total assholes?
YEAH - HOW ABOUT IT?
Not sure I'm getting this dog talking thing. Most dogs communicate pretty well with their owners. Penny does.
- feed me
- play with this damn ball
- waiting for a treat, guys
- in the CAR?!!!!
- rub my belly
- nite nite
- that food you're eating sure smells good
- I need to put my head out the car window and bark at things
Today I identify as a tic-tac object, buzzing an aircraft carrier
The Space Shuttle is 20 years old. That's forever in technology.
Initially, the Russians came up, to interfere with the elections, and promote peace between our nations. 20 years later, President for Life Vladimir Putin is poking at us with subs and satellites. Such irony. 8" floppies, anyone?
Speaking of lizards, watch out for frigid lizards falling from trees. You don't actually have to watch out for them - I just liked the title.
Although, 'Russia Sausage King killed in sauna with crossbow' is also pretty good.
- Got a relative in the service? Ask if they've ever seen something they can't identify in the air or water. I hear it was interesting on ships.. Do tell.
A pair of good samaritans interrupted a kidnapping in Philly. When I was very little, I wanted to know who these samaritans were. Were they a club? A religion? An offshoot of Russian Orthodox, coming to interfere in our elections?
Eventually I looked it up. This was much less shocking than hearing 'mass of Christian burial' as 'massive Christian burial'. It took years of therapy before I could even look at a Christian again.
- So in the Star Trek with John-Luke, is Q a forewarning of Q-Anon?
- Millions of Trekkers have now validated their existence.
I hadn't seen a movie with Mom for a while, so I suggested a nice family movie - she picked The House of Screaming Death.
- India is urging people to consume sugar, because it's been overproduced. Sounds like an ideal vacation spot.
Do you know that the Australian Department of Foreign Affairs warned citizens against traveling to the US, in part due to anticipated violence around the election? Part of me is chuckling, the other part is laughing loudly.
- PA was a battleground state in the election, and the text spam was off the hook (so to speak). On election day, I was considering turning the phone off. I'm looking into call and SMS blockers and will advise. It was absolute insanity.
- Speaking of the election, the Divide and Conquer was working at a level never seen before. Families and marriages were in conflict. This was stupid on so many levels. I want to set an example, after the fact. I don't hate you because you voted differently than me... it just means you're mentally deficient and don't understand. But I would never hold that against you - you're my readers first, voters third. I would not pull a list of voters, which will soon be available, after a hack, and visit your houses. Since you've never seen me, it would be a hell of a shock. Fortunately, I'd never sit you down and explain why you voted incorrectly, or force you to listen to me sing a few renditions of "New Yawk, New Yawk." I will not poke your ears out or hit you with red-hot pokers from the fireplace. I promise never to bring Al Gore with me to talk to you on any subject at all, for what feels like hours at a time, but in reality is 3 minutes. I wouldn't kick you off this blog and insist you go to a different, less sarcastic blog. I would not divorce you and claim you're no longer a ThermionicEmissions reader. I would not hurl any bodily fluids at your political signs, but insist everyone who put them up to take them down. I can't imagine pulling credit reports and messing with your ratings. My dog will not poop on your lawn, although she'll probably bark. I will not have your bank transfer any of your hard-earned money to an offshore account and put it into bitcoin, nor will I have your kids' school curriculum changed to all SJW, all the time. There will be no (new) scratches on your car, no (additional) adult toys in your bedroom, and no local government agencies to take your children because you're obviously an unfit parent. It's about love, people.
- Speaking of love, Antifa and Black Lives Matter are in front of the White House, causing trouble, vowing to stay for weeks if Trump is re-elected. Because voting is apparently not enough. Again, I have a solution: let them fall in love and go off happy, to live their lives in bliss. This blog is about solutions. The important thing here is not to be mad at these groups... they're doing what they do. What would you think if you saw a lone Antifa or BLM member walking in front of the White House with a sign that said "It's a fair election and the will of the people"?
Philly and surrounding areas were literally boarded up, in case of violence. Fortunately it was a waste of lumber.
- A guilty pleasure: Slade
The Flying AIDS is hitting middle-aged men disproportionally.
Damn virus is AGE-ist. Middle-age Lives Matter!
- The making of Led Zeppelin IV
So it's lunchtime and I'm eating the Regular: alligator and anchovies, when I hear the requisite banging and power tool noise. The Loud Family moved out 5 months ago and I don't know where this is coming from. It used to be such a quiet neighborhood, til I moved in. I looked out and couldn't find the source of the noise. This is disconcerting... normally it goes on outside, so at least you can sit inside and bitch at the offending neighbor. It's scary too, because you never know what they're up to. There's the House that Took Over the Street, down the block, with 6 floors down and a panic room. At least you could hear them when they were excavating. I think they're monitoring me for one of the letter agencies. The fact there's construction going on that we can't hear is most upsetting, because this might be an update, or a new House that Took Over the Street. There are no obvious taps on my electricity or phone lines, but that's coming. Next week they'll bring in the complex spy and tracking gear for the War Room. Since things are getting more and more... complicated.... it could be any of the Usual Suspects: CIA, NSA, FBI, DIA, Foreign Technology Desk, the Russians, or worse, the Democrats; the last 2 in preparation for the 2024 election. You know they'll deploy the normal tapping stuff, plug the thingy that listens to your conversations by pointing the laser at your window. The laugh is on them, when they hear the kids talking and the dog barking. There are people who say I'm paranoid. How can you not be paranoid, with all the letter agencies building underground spying bases to monitor you? Perhaps, in a historic moment of cooperation, like peace in the Middle East, the CIA house down the block is sharing information with the NSA house now being built. Remember: the wet boot flies at sundown,
In unrelated news, the libertarians might be building a house soon too. The way things have been going, they'd put the basement up top and forget to build the rest. The last count I saw was .99% for Jo Jorgensen, which is a little less thani Gary Johnson, in 2020. The 2 main parties worked their magic to keep the libertarians out of the debates, which hurt, but we need to to better. Locally we did, but not by much. Let me put it to you this way: if you're standing on the debate stage with Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump, how can you not look like the voice of sanity? By the same token, if you were allowed on the debate stage with Joe Biden and Donald Trump.....
We need to do a better job. If Trump was voted in as the candidate of true change, they need to hear about our platform. I didn't expect us to win this race, but it was a poor showing, and it got worse when Pennsylvania literally took votes away from Jorgensen from one count to the next.
HAPPYs
Delbert McClinton 80!
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| some mornings, it's best to go back to bed |
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