Your love is like a hammer to the finger
Today's Olympic News: two countries strongly disagree
- Philly's Mayor has decreed the zoo will be closed until all the animals have been vaccinated
Today I identify as a vacuum cleaner bag
- I need to start smoking at work - I'm missing out on all the smoke breaks
Mercy mercy and Land O' Lakes, my car is ready to be released from the jaws of the collision center. I don't remember what it looks like, so I'll have to trust that it's the right car. This could get ugly. On the other hand, I always wanted a 1980 Sedan deVille or a Town Car. This would also mean they got their pinstripe painting guy to put on the pinstripes that I didn't know my car had. As usual, thank the heavens for my wife, who did know the car had pinstripes. I remember the car had 4 doors, so they can't get anything past me on that one.
This means I'm finally out of limbo(s). Wife would tell me never to say such a thing.
If it makes her feel any better, I still can't get RedEx to pick up a next day envelope
- I have to go - Real Housewives of West Virginia is on
ME: Dear, you have some white... stuff... on the back of that shirt
HER: Oh, it's probably shaving cream
ME: Never mind.
ThermionicEmissions sends its heart out to all Afghanistan vets and families of those that didn't return. Unfortunately, like all wars, it was for the Military Industrial Complex. But that doesn't negate what you put into it. If it hurts too badly, please seek help.
The United States spent $822bn fighting the war and training Afghan forces, only to witness the Taliban's rapid conquest of the country.
- Discussion is allowed as long as you don’t say the wrong thing.
- Nabisco workers are striking for normal hours
- Nabisco workers' jobs are payment enough. Have you ever walked past one of the bakeries? It smells like heaven.
Welcome to the Taliban helpline:
- press 1 to shoot many people with a leftover AR15
- press 2 to shoot then rape a woman because she's not wearing a hijab
- press 3 or take over the country to close all blue jeans manufacturers
- press 4 to close down the shaver and shaving cream industries
- press 5 to sell some of those nice poppy plants
- The (fleeing) acting Afghanistan bank governor says the US left too quickly
- Because 20 years wasn't long enough to get anything done
- Butt Bandits of Bavaria: although I found the action decent, none of the actors had anything near a Bavarian accent. It was unrealistic in that there was no lube in 2 of the scenes. This will never be real life until most women say yes to anal. 4 stars.
- My Step-Brother Likes my Tranny Cock: the entire premise was off because it would more likely be a step-sister. The instrument in question dwarfed the rest of the instruments in the movie, which made me feel insecure, nervous, and looking forward to the sequel, "My Step-Brother Likes my Tranny Cock 2 - Return of the Monster." Did you know you could dial a number and get a tranny to come 'visit' you? I have to go now...
- DIAL-A-MILF Oh No, it's my MOM!: a tired, hackneyed old premise, based upon the MILF trope everybody's doing these days. Although there's no age list in pr0n, actresses are 18-23. 24-28 MILFs. 29-31 Cougars. 32-up grannies. Let's face it - not everybody's mom has DDs. Still fun, I give it 3 stars.
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