Google Note: if you subscribe to ThermionicEmissions by email, Google, in their infinite wisdom, is nuking that service by June. You can still subscribe via RSS or torture your eyes by coming to the blog. My apologies, but it's out of my control.
Your love is like insufficient coffee for the morning
I am not an expert in many things. In fact. my wife says I am not an expert in any things. But I pick up quickly. After watching several seasons of Emergency, I am an expert in fire companies and hospitals. 20 seasons of Air Crash Investigations makes me an expert in airplanes and crash investigation. I can tell you by looking at a crash, which way the plane hit the ground. I can damn near fly a plane. By way of warning, I wouldn't get on any plane I was flying. But if both pilots jumped out of the plane while it was flying, and there was nobody left who could actually fly a plane, or had seen a plane on tv once, I could damn near almost set the auto-pilot to some numbers or something. And this is what's important in flying.
Now, I want every one of you in the airline industry to stop laughing right NOW. If you keep it up, you'll be oxygen-starved, and those cute masks will not fall from overhead. Ladies, since we're only a short way into actual flight, no one has designed a fashionable oxygen mask, because you wouldn't be caught dead wearing the one that falls down in an emergency (and dead you will be caught).
Watching Air Crash Investigation sure has contributed to my knowledge. It's like a more interesting version of Computer Crash Investigation, which I already do. Except for the bodies: computer crashes don't generally involve bodies, unless you didn't back up your data. Also, the show completely and absolutely does not deal with... human... stuff... remains. You'd think the planes were flown automatically. This is wonderful for me because I can learn things and safely ignore body parts, which generally tend to make me pass out, like getting an actual non-spam call on my phone.
This also makes parts of hospital shows a little rough for me. But there are fire engines.. WOO WOO! And when the docs say to give the patient 300 millicraters of chocolate milk, all the people in the house yell at the tv: "That's not right, you idiot. You don't give that to a head trauma patient." It's like participation tv.
Last year I put up what initially looked like a Charlie Brown Christmas tree. Two years back, I put up what currently looks like a Charlie Brown mailbox. It leans to one side, like way too many of my neighbors.
So I can safely say I'm an expert in many areas. And even if there were any doubt in my mind, I could go online and claim to be an expert, just like everyone else!
Today I identify as burning detritus from a missile hit.
A very rough survey of family and in-laws shows no vaccine takers, old folks excepted. It's very interesting that so many don't want it. don't blame me - I said nothing to no one.
- the archbishop of Canterbury calls on public to pray for the queen
- nobody told him it was the duke who died
- can somebody tell me if they're all reptilians, or just the queen. Does she eat the body?
The government vows to strike back against the Russia hack. President Biden vowed to get even, saying "I'm gonna get that wascally wabbit!" His handlers' eyes rolled and they pulled him away from the mic. Expect a 'clarification' later today.
Amazon CEO Jeff Bezos says Amazon should "do a better job for our employees" after unionization was voted down. He pledges
- no more peeing in bottles - everyone will get 1 gallon jugs
- we're already paying you $15/hr, STFU
- the more I pay you, the less my ex gets
- Do you realize I've had to give up one of my 16 mansions for you?
- you have great job security: we're like Faceyspaces - people are too stupid to go anywhere else
- drivers' trucks will get engines and brakes, so they don't have to stick their feet out the bottom, like Fred Flintstone
- shifts will be cut to 25 hours a day
- Hobbies: napping
I want to warn everyone who uses health aides for assistance: keep your car away from them. The one who takes care of my mom just had her 2nd car crash and couldn't show up. Then her employer didn't have a replacement. They sure have a lot of car crashes and an insane inability to provide coverage. Apparently this is normal for the industry. Yay. I wonder if they have car crashes if they take the bus...
- Regulators are eyeing Pelotons, saying they're unsafe around children.
- What about the people who use them? They're foul and evil.
Read this. Then read it again. Then get very mad.
Regardless of who you vote for, this is intolerable. Major media screwing with a presidential election? Seriously? It's right out in the open.
In completely unrelated news, O'Keefe was thrown off Twitter and YouTube the next day.
I often wonder about famous persons and their internet usage. We know some of them live on Twitter, talking about their boring famous lives, and 'influencing.' But what of the famous who have no desire to live on Twitter (or whatever) and just use it for information or entertainment? Wait til I find out famous people read this blog. Or some of my Twitter guitar buddies are actually famous. Everybody, except Keith Richards, uses social media or the web, even if just for amusement.
Famous people reading the blog? Nah. This blog is way too well-hidden for them to find it. It's probably better they're anonymous anyway... it would turn out they're famous people I don't like. So don't forget to tell your friends, or people you don't like, to visit... doesn't matter if they're famous or not.
Did you ever think maybe some of the more sane celebrities like to see things burn now and again? Arnold logs in as a Kardashian and just types stupid shit. Her followers might not know the difference, so he has to make it really ridiculous. Everything Gwynyth Paltrow said about vagina-scented candles was actually Ron Howard. And everything Barbara Streisand ever complained about was... no, it was her... nobody else could do that.
And don't mess with me - I was blocked by David Coverdale (Whitesnake). Still not sure why.
- Oregon wants to go All Masks All the Time
- PANIC PANIC. Run around with your hands over your head - THE SKY IS FALLING. THE ALIENS ARE LANDING. THE IRS IS COMING FOR US
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