Your love is like a sushi lunch from 7-11
- New York mayor pledges to rid city of gun violence
- bringing in Superman and Wonder Woman, housing criminals on Krypton
Today I identify as a dump truck - vooooom!
ThermionicEmissions has its sixth follower. I am beyond excited. Can't you tell?
Pr0nhub and Google better watch out.
Flying AIDS News
It's difficult to sort out the best Flying AIDS headline, but I think I found it:Washington DC Requires Nude Strippers To Be Masked, Clubs Warned About ‘Staff Not Wearing Masks’They are required to wear a mask, while sharing bodily fluids with you. Brilliance that could only come from DC. Has anybody seen Fauci?Get well wishes to Reggie Dwight, aka Elton John, who tested positive for the Flying AIDS. He was vaccinated.There’s a new version of omicron but so far it doesn’t appear to be more dangerousno no no no very dangerous, PANIC, get 5th booster!They had covid-19 once. Then, they got it again.
WHO warns of potential for more variants as omicron subvariant found in USTwo-thirds with Omicron say they have had Covid beforeOSHA will try a different route to a vaccine mandate for businessesRed wine could reduce chances of COVID-19 infection, U.K. study suggestsbetween the pot and red wine, the world could become a better place..
California’s COVID gun store shutdowns ruled illegal
- Pentagon Places Thousands of Troops on Standby for Deployment to Eastern Europe in Standoff With Russia
- #ImpeachBiden now. Hurl the Pentagon skyward to see how aerodynamic its shape is.
You're probably going to say that you didn't see this coming....
Child badly burned while pouring gas onto bonfire at home in New Jersey
Same child will die while demolishing his house from his bedroom
At least we're moving in the right direction. That old American spirit shows itself yet again!
- After all the creative work I put into the blog, who'd have thought that the page that gets the most visits, by far, is the review I did of a police scanner.
I watched Jimmy Fallon last night. And by watched, I mean played with my laptop and listened here and there. [Foreshadowing] A headache appeared out of nowhere. Ok, I'm late to the party, again. I wondered what the jokes would be about, as a study showed every late night show was very left-leaning and anti-Trump, while he was in office. Fallon went after Biden, shockingly. In a very stupid way. He even managed to get a shot at Trump (I voted libertarian). So very little has changed. He's still got that younger brother personality, full of energy. Not my speed. The headache felt more and more like drilling in my head, so I went to bed.
Ya know, I have a bad feeling my headaches are secondary to a toothache. This is frightening and disturbing, as I had all that work done last year. Yes, dentistry is a racket, but they fixed my problems. How do I know there's a tooth problem? When Wife looked at it, it hurt like hell. Pizza doesn't look good to me. I couldn't take out the trash (this may or may not be related).
The disturbing thing about the dentist was they all wore masks, so I couldn't see their faces. Dentist offices are usually bubbling over with gorgeous women. Don't get me wrong - I was happier that they knew what they were doing, but still... Anyway, I have no desire to go back, masks or not. The pain isn't pleasant (no, really?) so I'll have to pull all my resources together to make an appointment. I don't know why this is, but it is. My arm could be broken, but calling the doctor to check my injury could take weeks. I'm bad that way. I'm bad in many ways, but Wife and Dog tolerate me well.
Dog is out of control, being aided by Wife. Dog flatly refuses to pick up her stuffed animals, which frequently are in places that would trip us. Wife keeps reminding Dog that if she kills us, there will be nobody left to follow around the house, or even feed her. Then Wife goes to pet store and buys Dog three more stuffed animals. Speaking of killing, I have to keep reminding Wife that I don't have enough life insurance to make it worth killing me. I keep it this way on purpose. Did you ever get out of bed to a huge pile of true crime novels? They started like "True Mafia Killings." I'm starting to get suspicious because her new books have titles like "Death of an IT Guy" and "The Guitar Player Murders."
For all the people and media screaming DISINFORMATION, has anybody thought about the actual 'experts' that can't agree? The steadily-changing advice? When you hear DISINFORMATION, it's DISHONEST and a PLOY, with an AGENDA.
Cranky old Neil Young (I'm a fan) told Spotify that Joe Rogan needs to be pulled or Neil's music will be pulled. Over misinformation.
Idea: subject the misinformation to the same brief tests as the 'official' cure.
Recommends it be renamed: self-crashing, auto-exploding, talks with strange accent
C'mon guys.... the Batmobile could operate with no one in the car. It's 2022 already.
Peter Dinklage, known good actor and least likely to get on most Disney rides, had some things to say about Woke Disney casting actors not similar to original parts, such as the upcoming Snow White. Surprisingly, Dinklage seems to be for more of it.
In the remake of Snow White, Disney wanted to make sure no character was white. And that there was room for 14 more sequels. The casting so far:
- latina Rachel Zegler as Snow White (the woman is seriously beautiful)
- Dennis Rodman and his North Korean basketball team as the 8 Dwarves
- Whoopie Goldberg as the evil stepsisters
- Steve Irwin as one of the Brothers Grimm (we are never told which)
- and Meat Loaf as the glass coffin
A Night at the Opera, A Day at the Dentist
Something happened to a tooth. It's a tooth not touched by the dentist (yet). I have a theory.... after all the necessary work was done, the other teeth got jealous and demanded services too. Maybe the dentist hypnotized them, I don't know.
In any case, there was some serious pain. In a place I like to use. At this point, everybody's main goal is to get rid of the pain, ASAP. And I forgot how these folks operate. Let me give you an example: let's say you walk in the door with a dog stuck in your jaw. A smiling, personable tech will sit you down and take xrays. They like taking xrays. If you told them your arm hair hurt, they'd take xrays. After the pleasantries are finished, she will ask you what the problem is. You never went to dental school, so you figure you better explain it, so they'll be able to fully diagnose the problem. So you tell her the story, she takes xrays, then tells you she's off to see the wizard doctor, who will have a look at everything. Thirty minutes later, the doctor appears. You look around for where the applause is coming from. It may be the overhead speakers, which normally play absolute crap you do not want to hear. The doctor asks what's wrong. You have the privilege of saying the exact thing you said to the personable tech. You feel that you are repeating yourself repeating yourself.
Just to make sure you're serious and not kidding about the problem, Doc is going to 'tap' on the area and you say when it hurts. Even the patients whose bodies do not regularly try to escape the chair by themselves feel a little scared when she brings out the Dental Sledge. You see the size of this instrument alone and inherently know this part of the examination is not going to go well. Dentists have a horrible reputation, some deservedly so, and they're not going to help themselves by bringing out stone age nazi tools of torture. Unfortunately, things are not stopping there, no sir. One phrase that automatically indicates you should be anywhere else in the world but in that chair is, "Tell me if it hurts." Then the gentle tapping starts. And when I say gentle tapping, I mean banging away. They cut you a break - the first tap is never the problem....
Dentist: I'm going to tap. Tell me if it hurts. BANG. Does that hurt?
Me: [recoiling in terror] Nope.
Dentist: Does this hurt? BANG.
Me: Nope.
Dentist: Here? BANG.
Me: OMFG YES, THAT'S DEFINITELY THE ONE, YES SIR, YOU HAVE DEFINITELY HIT IT, I HOPE I DIDN'T WET YOUR CHAIR.
And they look at you as if you're being unreasonable by screaming when they slam your painful spot with a sledgehammer.
Some think dentists are nazis, getting off on inflicting pain.
Dentist: I'm going to tap. Tell me if it hurts. BANG. Does that hurt?
Me: [recoiling in terror] Nope.
Dentist: Does this hurt? BANG.
Me: Nope.
Dentist: No? How about here? BANG. No? Here? BANG.
Me: AAAAAAAAAAAH.
Dentist: So here, right? BANG.
Me: AAAAAAAAAAAH - right.
Dentist: Ok, how about here?
and it becomes almost a game, like Pound the Pain, or Pound the Gopher, or Pound the Patient. The really good dentists manage to keep a straight face when they hit you, some not even displaying symptoms of sexual excitement.
Finally the doctor pronounces a diagnosis, which you cannot pronounce.
Well, Mr. lefty, you have a dog stuck in your jaw. This is called canine mandible impactus.
What can you do - it hurts?
Well, we can shave some of the tail hair down, so it doesn't get into your mouth.
But it hurts.
Here's what we gonna do: we'll make you another appointment in eight weeks, and you'll come in. We'll get out the canine mandible impactus meter to check everything out. Then we'll do a short procedure called a canine mandible no impactus, which should take care of your problem. Ok?
Ummm... ouch... I was kinda hoping you could do something today, to get rid of the pain.
No, we can't possibly do that - we won't get as much money that way. Here's what I'll do: I'm going to send another of our personable techs to discuss finances with you. You think you're in pain now.....
- World's Smallest Books:
- Famous Jewish Basketball Players
Don't joke about that shit.... the Anti-Defamation League will git uppity and start demanding the NBA hire more Jewish players.
Similarly speaking.....
With an upcoming spot in the Supreme Court, President Taxit promises to appoint a black woman. With a history of dumb moves, The Diversity President strikes again. This is the highest court in the land. It's rather important. You want the best and brightest. But Biden doesn't hire that way - he appoints by gender and race. This is racism and sexism to start with. If he announced he wanted a white male justice, we'd have (more) riots. And it would be illegal.
Just like my stance on tech workers, I don't care about any of your personal stats - I want the best person for the job. In my interviewing history, that's the only candidate that got hired. We turned out to be a very diverse group; but we didn't go hiring by gender, race, sexual preference, hair color, or religion.
I knew a woman who was thinking of becoming a phone sex worker, back when that was a thing. She thought it would be cool to go further and become a Mistress, with a house full of slaves; guys in maid outfits, cleaning the place, with no expectation of sex.
Did I mention we were a couple for a year?
NO, not that way. I turned in my maid outfit as soon as I was promoted. Something about maids not having mustaches and a successful game of Rock Star and Groupie. The relationship got off to an auspicious start when she showed my brother some nudes she was particularly proud of. And she had reason to be proud..
She had an amazing talent. Ok, a few amazing talents. She could do the thing that stupifies every man; take her bra off under her shirt. But she could also appear taller. She was not a tall lady, but she could dress a certain way and everybody thought she was tall. Either that or she was skilled at mass hypnosis.
This is precisely why I don't write about my girlfriends.
Somewhere out of the blue (more likely gray), I found out we were coming into a major snowstorm in a few days. I guess not paying attention is occasionally a problem. I mean, you can usually just count on it to be gray, with a few odd days of sun here and there. For some reason, we have all our groceries. Usually we're in need of something as it snows. No doubt the shelves are picked clean of milk and bread, if there was any delivered (Supply Chain Shortages). We do not get snow like Canada or Minnesota, where 12" is just an annoyance. We get 4" and everything's a mess until July. All these years with snow and the city has not figured out how to manage it. They could even ask Minnesota how they do it, but no. Wait... I know why... if they learned how to do it right, they wouldn't need a small army of snow removal workers. Nobody does anything to endanger bureaucracy (except firing toll takers to put in the Automated Spying System{ASS}).
As you know, I've been trying to get out on weekends, so we already have the reason I can't get out this weekend. With the amount of times this has happened, you'd have to call it a conspiracy. Either that or everybody got together to make sure I never got out to bother them. Like they did to make sure I never had kids. You realize that I haven't been to Guitar Center since before the Flying AIDS. Yes, I know I'll be disappointed when I get there, but I'd at least like the option of going.
Again, remember, most heart attacks occur while shoveling, so don't shovel.
Earlier, Neil Young was cranky about Spotify and threatened to pull his music over Joe Rogan's 'misinformation' about the Flying AIDS. Neil said it was either Neil or Joe. Spotify chose Joe. Meanwhile, Apple has taken advantage, sending notice to its subscribers with playlists, tweets, and push notifications.
I spent a few seconds on this.
No disrespect to the people who are affected by this, but the problem never touched me. Why? I rip albums and CDs to my hard drive. Everything's automatically available (including a folder full of Neil Young songs). I can take it anywhere (on my phone) and no one is keeping a record of what I listen to, to market to me. I don't have an account to any streaming service because it never occurred to me that I needed to do it that way. Plus I'm not really sure the services are going to have the music I listen to. I also don't want tweets and push notifications. Just a thought.....
- OK, WTF Is Going On With the Reddit Antiwork Subreddit and the Fox News Ambush?
- Indeed. Although the article looks at the Fox News ambush, it's interesting to note the viral posts in the subreddit.
- It looks like a bunch of waah waah waah, sprinkled with an idea here and there. Perhaps these people recently graduated from one of our Woke universities and are demanding to sit home and have somebody pay them. Most of their complaints come down to this: do something, instead of complaining. Don't like your boss or your job? Get a different one. Come up with a need and fulfill it. Prefer unions? Organize. You are responsible for you.
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