Saturday, March 21, 2020

Captivity - Day One

Idiot governor Tom Wolf declared closure as of last night, so Pennsylvania is locked down.

I got up early this morning, around 1pm, and surveyed the damage.
It was sunny, which only served to add to the confusion. This happened because idiot governor and state legislature ruled that it can only be sunny once a week at most. Mother Nature obeyed.

The guard posted at our door nodded good morning. I invited him in for coffee; he seemed about ready to come in, then he recoiled. For some reason, we're the only house on the block with a guard. He has a hazmat suit, so I figure he's one of idiot governor's boys. We make coffee a lot and leave the door open, so he can smell the rich aroma of French roast. If they're going to stand outside, we're going to play with them.

Mrs lefty had been on the phone. This is not actually different from normal. She talked to all our relatives, plus some other people's relatives.  She revealed the discussions to me, when I fell down the stairs at 1pm. Everybody was calm. Most knew there was something off with this. There is nothing sweeter than vindication.

If you're going to be held hostage in your house, the present is a decent time, strictly in the area of technology. You have the internet, phones, and video conference. Unless, of course, the other end of the video has an iDevice, then you're f'd. iDevices use Facetime, which no other device on the planet does, so you have to find another way to do things.  Hint: the encrypted text messenger called Signal has video too, and runs on all phones or computers.


Me? I'm still furious.
We are big boys and girls. We can make our own decisions. If we want to play at Corona Playground, there's no reason we shouldn't. We have had our movement restricted for no good reason, nor is there a good reason to restrict movement.

Stay with me a moment, please.
If you have a brain cell in your head, you're not going out close-dancing. You're going out for food, medicine, and hopefully to help others. There is no radical change - you use your best sense. We do not need to be restricted in movement. The government isn't going to rid us of anything but tax money. This is a perfect explanation of why we don't need Big Government. In fact, many Big Government roadblocks have been removed, so food and services can continue. Just like the libertarians said. You don't need all that crap to live your life. The roadblocks aren't helping anybody.


  • most importantly: remain calm
  • if absolutely necessarily, watch the news or check social media ONCE a day. More than that is toxic: it focuses you on Bad.
  • help others, especially the elderly and sick - there have been all sorts of stories of neighborhoods getting together, maintaining help groups and keeping in touch by email.
  • make Family Time. This ancient art existed before Faceyspaces. Play board games. Tell scary stories. Watch some absolutely hideous tv.  What manly men haven't played Barbies with their little girl? What manly men haven't played Barbies without their little girl? What manly men haven't played dress up like Barbie? Please don't respond to that question.

Mrs lefty stated that the captivity will have some consequences: family feud, divorces, alcoholics, and Corona Babies. Please use contraception unless you are already trying for a baby. I'm thinking about alcoholism, but my old boss suggested drugs. He said it took too long to get good at alcoholism. RIP, you big dummy.


I'm thinking of removing our car's muffler and painting FREE CORONAVIRUS on the sides of the car, so I can go cruising. If you're in the hood, stop by and see me. I'll be just in front of the police car with the flashing lights. You should probably wait the til police car goes away first. You don't want idiot governor to throw you in gulag without hazmat suit.

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