Captivity - Day 80 lefty Lives Matter

You'd have to be dead to miss all the protesting lately. Some agree, some disagree, some throw acid, and some just don't understand. We didn't understand, until yesterday, when we started lefty Lives Matter.

You think it will never happen to you.
Until it does.
Then you get an appreciation for the struggles of others.

It was a nice day - there were no clouds or any obstructions. No demonstrating.
As on all good days, there was a trip to Dairy Queen to procure a malt and banana split (sometimes only a split, because dogs don't like bananas).

Out of nowhere, a police car comes ROARING around Mrs lefty, causing her to brake. Officer Zoom waved 'oops' and flew down the street. And everything that came from Dairy Queen was all over the car.

This was only because I'm left handed - don't tell me otherwise.
This is an insult to anyone who doesn't use their right hand. An insult to Dairy Queen and all other ice-cream-like stores. An insult to us all, as citizens of the Earth. And, according to Al Sharpton, an insult to black people.

There will be demonstrations.
Demands for reparations.
Huge cleaning bills.
Looting of stores that don't carry things for lefties.
Throwing right handed legislators off bridges.
A huge contingent of right handers marching with us  (Right Guilt)
People who identify as lefties.
Police will have to take Dexter Sensitivity Training. Colleges will offer them.
A special contingent of the Lactose Intolerant, marching in solidarity (sorta).
In protest, all major sports will Take A Straw before the game (in their left hand)
Any member of the press who questions the movement will have to apologize.
The street will be closed down as a permanent memory of the injury and reminder of systemic left-ism.
A clear distinction between the left handed and the political left
Don't give me that crap about them not knowing I was left handed, even though I wasn't in the car

Upside Down World

In an effort to mend fences with the black community in Minneapolis, police were caught on tape slashing tires at a protest.

[Kentucky governor] Beshear says state will put resources into making sure all black residents have health insurance.

It's not like I haven't been saying this.....

Just let me know, through the Comments, when I've been locked up too long.