We've turned up missing.
Things happened.
With my computer.
Things that you wouldn't believe.
Things that couldn't happen, even if I performed them manually.
I think I purchased Satan's solid state drive.
This would not surprise any ThermionicEmissions reader.
I put the drive in for more space. It proceeded to become involved in the boot process, so when I removed it, the machine wouldn't boot.
Several of the best utilities and the best advice later, nothing continued to work.
Further, several of the drive partitions had switched places. This does not happen. I couldn't make it happen if I wanted to. Once I realized what happened, I reinstalled my operating system (which disappeared) and off we were.
We're going to have a group of exorcists by later on today. The only question is if the computer has to be Catholic...
What does this have to do with the blog?
I was too demoralized to bother with anything else, plus I had to remain calm and silent: the police said some neighbors had come up missing.
Mr lefty's birthday was recently.
For her special day, she took my mother to lunch and completely ignored me.
That's ok, I was consoled by the Twins.
Code Green will also present a problem at our massage parlors. The masseurs have to get certified to massage at 6'. Ever tried to give manual stimulation from across the room?
It looks like our vaunted Captivity series is coming to an end. And when I say coming to an end, I mean 'as Idiot Mayor deigns'. Then it will be back to our normal ranting.
So Scotland is looking at their own spaceport.
Over at NASA: "Sir...SIR... come quickly! We're getting some otherworldly noise over the radio. Maybe it's the signal we're not alone!"
"No, Johnson, that's the Scots talking."
Back at home, we've been cleaning and rearranging furiously.
And when I say furiously, I mean we're furiously throwing anything that isn't nailed down (and a few that are) across the room. Occasionally through windows. If we wait til very late, it competes with the fireworks. Fireworks? Fireworks. We have 1 or 2 idiots who set off fireworks for no apparent reason, every few days. I like to communicate with them when they do...
Them: BOOM
Me: Take your small dick inside with your fireworks!
Them: silence.
Them: BOOM
Another massive step for neighborly relations.
Sometimes I grow weary of being the Weird House; other times I have to protect my title.
As everyone knows, we're on the brink of electric cars.
Seems like a good idea.
Of course, there's always fallout...
- Godammit, Jimmy.... you took the car and didn't plug it in. How am I going to get to work today?
- No, you have to plug it into its own special outlet. And you CAN'T plug the tv into that outlet... this is the 3rd tv this month.
- You also can't plug your little sister into that outlet. Sometimes I think the stork dropped off the wrong baby.
In grade school, we found out a neighbor's kid honestly thought the stork brought babies. He must've had some interesting parents. If Mom, heaven forbid, lost the baby, did they tell him the stork took the baby?
I think I've found a solution to knocking down statues: any statue destroyed will be fed to the destroyers.
I wanted to bring you this, which is the main reason I brought everything back up: Fish eggs can hatch after being eaten and pooped out by ducks.
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