Captivity - Day 47 The dead are messing with us

The weather is more brown than green today. I'm not sure whether this is a weather cycle or it felt more like a brown day. It's not even a nice shade of brown, which means that instead of the autumn leaves, shit will be falling from the clouds.

Attack of the Synchronized Mowers is still going on, but they stopped selling tickets and are now performing free, due to the Flying AIDS. The audience itself has to wear masks, but not the grass cutters.


The paranoid think everyone's out to get them. We medicate them.
BUT, just because you're paranoid, doesn't mean they aren't out to get you.

THEREFORE, if you hallucinate, it doesn't mean the hallucinations aren't there.
The problem comes when you mention the hallucinations. The quantum physics people tell you that simply mentioning them calls the hallucinations into being (assuming they don't exist already). This always makes things fun when you see the doctor, who can't tell if you were hallucinating or are hallucinating now. If the doctor thinks you might have been hallucinating, you get meds and begin doing what the medical folks call the Thorazine Shuffle. This is what happens when you take too many antipsychotic medicines. You start to look like a zombie, which, while handy for video games and certain tv shows, doesn't look good on your work history (unless you work in federal government, at which point you're guaranteed an upper-level position).

When the dog gets into bed, you can plainly see her. When you can also see the dog get into bed on a different side of the bed, you have to wonder which dog was real, if any. Given the history of the dog, the one that isn't foaming at the mouth, trying to kill you, has a better chance of being your actual dog. If both dogs are foaming and your dog doesn't foam, it's best to get the f- out of your bed at once.

You can also look at the stairwell and say to yourself that the laws of physics do not allow the railing to sway in that manner, at which point you're back to the Thorazine Shuffle. The only way to get past this is to tell the doctor the hallucinations are all pleasant, non-threatening ones. "Oh, I see flowers and stuffed animals" instead of "I see Ozzy's 80th birthday" or "Those street signs are gendered."

The next day, a mother or wife asks you to clean that washy-scrubby-dishy-cleany thing you put on your hand to do the dishes. These things have no actual name. She says that the procedure will go better when you remove that bug that's crawling across the cleany thingie.  This does not help you, because most of the cleany bits are moving, causing a metaphysical dilemma and total breakdown of your belief system.

And that, Your Honor, establishes my sanity in this sanity hearing.




You better watch out - SWAT and Sheriffs are breaking down doors to arrest people for working.

A gun was pulled at a bank the other day over an argument about social distancing. WHEN WILL WE go back to the time when guns were strictly to rob the damn bank, not to assault other customers??

California Governor Gavin Newsom (D-Uranus) said that as the state prepares to reopen retail, 'We're not going back to normal.'  This man is obviously a body-snatched fraud - California was NEVER normal.