Hey, welcome to ummm.... wait... ummm.. aren't you going to let me guess?
Ok. Welcome to Monday (because my alarm said so). If it doesn't go off, it's either Saturday or Sunday, so I have a 50% chance of guessing what day it is. Plus my calendar says it's Shower Week.
It's been a great few days. For Nanook. Or anything happening near the north pole. It is important to remember that penguins appear at the south pole (and the zoo). And in really strange dreams.
Regardless of any news, DC is the worst city for recovery: it's full of hot air.
The queen may never return to royal duties, due to the Flying AIDS. That would be a shame. He and Bernie Taupin did a lot of great work together.
Today's Best Headline: Virus found in feces more than a month after patient tests negative. Repeat after me: Do NOT go into science.
There will be a Travis McCready(?) concert to test whether American is ready to rock again. Has anybody given a thought to how spectacularly this could go wrong? Apparently not. With a name like Travis McCready, the audience won't be rocking (no offense to whatever they will be doing).
Apparently there's a viral video of a Chinese woman pleasuring herself on different furniture in Ikea. Chinese media got ahead of it, so it only had 9 million views. Yes, they held onto the Flying AIDS, where people died, but at least they got the masturbation video out. Where there's a will, there's a way.
Amtrak to require riders to wear face coverings starting today.
They really jumped on this one, didn't they?
As far as I know, Idiot Governor remained in his underground lair this weekend.
My boss encouraged his staff to have sex.
Oddly enough, Mrs lefty doesn't see that as an effective reason.
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