Tuesday, May 19, 2020

Captivity - Day 60 Tracking the Wolf-Moose



Derrell Sims ("The Alien Hunter") refers to aliens as Extraterrestrial Skinheads.
Take it however you want, but this is WINNING!

He ingratiated himself to the Japanese by doing a great (foul) impersonation and knowing Japanese, while they were talking about him in front his face.


Remember: friends don't let friends use Faceyspaces


SmileDirectClub Inc sued NBCUniversal for nearly $3 billion for defamatory reports about news their Teleledentistry. Teledentristy. Dental services over phone or video. A negative report on teledentistry. Who woulda thought?  Hey, Mrs Patient - can you pull C12 please? Don't worry - it won't hurt.


The Precision Multiple Stereo Mower Committee was out in full force.  I'm not positive, but I think they added a few mowers to the chorus. It's difficult to get the entire block synchronized, but they have those earpieces that the talking heads wear on the news. It must be something to see from above. At the very end of the show, they get into letters for the chopper, that say F- You (just for the children). It's better than watching band rehearsal at school. Of course the chopper must stay 11,001 feet from the mowers, due to social distancing.


Today we watched a number of public officials giving stats on the Flying AIDS, as if they had a single clue as to what's going on with it. We found out that New Jersey had 274 patients go into the hospital and 273 discharged from the hospital. The official, excited as can be, announced that it's because of the people of New Jersey. The sign language dude saw the stats and walked off the set. Even he knows the figures were bullshit. To their credit, the charts were nice and pretty, which is the job of chart-makers the world over.

What have we learned?
They still know nothing.
There is a business re-opening plan, based upon nothing.
You may not leave your house to go to the businesses, based upon nothing.
We have somehow flattened the curve, whatever that means, based upon nothing, and there have been some damn fine charts!



The crud on weekday tv is of a higher quality than the weekend crud. We have only seen 434 lawyer commercials - it was a needed break. Star Trek is on now. My only complaint is that they're all reruns. It says right in the guide - rerun. Anyway, perhaps there are some things you want to hear or may have heard....


  • Hey Spock- why do you have more makeup on than Uhura? Is a woodie logical?
  • Scotty - don't you have anything to do? Get off the bridge. And take that alleged accent with you.
  • Sulu: we got a message from a Dr. Crusher. She asks that you stop messaging Wesley.
  • Dammit, Jim, I'm a doctor - not a.. doc... never mind.
  • Kirk - get that dead animal off your head. No, you cannot make the nurses' uniforms 3" shorter. You two - beam down and explore the planet. We will bury you in space.
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